I have problems going out too.
I think there is something about becoming overweight, that people start discriminating against us, and then we start doing it to ourselves.
I was partnered with a younger thinner woman some years ago for fitness testing, and I could perform 3 times as many crunches as her. But I didn't feel it was because she was thin. But when I couldn't perform something, I then had to blame it on my fatness. I was at a lecture once, and a woman nearby sat on a chair and it broke. She was thin. But if I sat on that same chair, I would have felt that my fatness broke it.
Oddly enough, I got a pair of lycra Terry cycling shorts and I feel so good in them. I know this is silly. But I think it is because they remind me that someone thought that overweight people care just as much about their health, and want to be active, and want clothes to be active in, as anybody else.
Yes some overweight people don't care about health, but many skinny people don't care about their health either.
But once I finish I ride I feel I am feeling better. Today I started reading a book by David Burns, who is knowm for the book "Feeling Good: the New Mood therapy" which has become a classic in self-help. He says that it is our thoughts that create our moods, and often these thoughts are unrealistic, and pessimistic, and sometimes just not useful at all. So he has many exercises to get at these thoughts that are so automatic and fleeting we are not even aware of them.
I suffer from severe depression, but I think that this book can help everyone deal with everyday frustrations of life.
There is nothing wrong with wanting company for a ride. But if it limits your riding, then you might try to find some other people to ride with. I find it difficult to take a fifteen minute walk. But if I say, I need something at the store, and I will walk there, I am more likely to do it. I don't know if this will work for you.
Good luck with the riding. If nothing else, perhaps a different time of day would be easier for you to get yourself out.
Mary
When I get passed I think this:
Here's the thing -- sometimes, when I'm riding up a hill, it does take me awhile, and I'm huffing & puffing my way up the hill (mind you, they're not BIG hills....they are long & rolling though)... There are lots of cyclists out where we ride, and of course, they constantly pass me.
Oh boy, have you ever named my tune!
So a month ago I finally got around to reading Heft on Wheels by Mike Magnuson. And on page 46 and 47, he also names my tune. I take encouragement from this. It makes me smile:
"When the attacks begin - meaning that someone blasts off the front of the pack - we are climbing into these hills...And at the back of this long string is where I'll be: 255 pounds of sweat and hard breathing and guts churning with Gatorade and PowerGel and the Taco Bell that I know I shouldn't have eaten for lunch. The farther into the long climbs, the farther I drop back, till I'm as much as 600 yards behind everybody and all alone, with only the roadside flowers and dogwood trees to see the effort I'm putting forth."
"But the diamond in every hill's lining is that if you go up, you'll eventually go down and....I am, like Frosty the Snowman, the greatest belly-whomper in the world. The little guys relax on the long descents, to recover and gather their strength for another climb, and this, of course, is the proper way to cycle - ride hard, recover, ride hard, recover - but the long descents are my only chance to catch up, so I click into the biggest gear I can crank and I let it rip..."
"So if I'm out there riding with you, and you think you're a bad@@@ cyclist, a hammer, a machine, and you're feeling all smug about yourself because you're a few hundred yards ahead of me on that long, long hill, let me tell you buddy, if I can see you on the road ahead of me, if I'm anywhere close to you, I'm really kicking your @@@".
It's not zen, but it works. If you want zen, try this the next time you are passed:
"You're harshin my mellow, man" :cool:
You gals are really wicked great :)
Thank you all so much for your responses -- everything -- things you have all shared & the sharing of your experiences!
My husband and I went out yesterday in the blazing afternoon sun, 97+ degrees with 70% humidity. We've had soooooo much rain in May & June, so it was great just to be out & not waiting for "perfect weather".
We planned on riding a 14 mile country road loop that we did last week, and we did -- but, this time we turned around at 7 miles -- for a total of 14 miles.
The day was just TOO hot -- but, we did climb the hills, and I actually did go up one faster than I had last week -- which felt great. To be honest, I brought all of you ladies along with me in spirit ;) , and we made the hill together!
plantluvver -- The only other rider I know is my husband. I've got a few
girlfriends, but no one else rides bikes. So, I will make it my
goal this week to get out at least one day by myself. Perhaps
I'll make a riding friend when I'm out & about. :) Or, I really
might enjoy going solo.
eclectic -- You're right -- PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION :D
betagirl -- It means a lot to someone when they hear something positive
from another human being, even if it's just a smile & a "hello".
I know that to be true. And, I'm happy that you're riding with
your friend. I'm sure that he appreciates the company soooo
much!! :)
Beth-Ro -- Thanks for the book recommendation. Thank you for making
me smile :D !!
GLC1968 -- I DO feel great to be out there and I can definitely tell that
I am improving. It really is such a good feeling. I've been
paying much more attention to my gearing, too - When I first
started riding, I didn't know how to shift -- Proper gearing
really makes climbing A LOT EASIER - PHEW!! :cool:
I hope that you all are having a beautiful & peaceful day -- to you & yours!!
Thanks again!
Denise