It just dawned on me that my "girls" nights have more to do with getting away from the kids than from DH.
;)
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It just dawned on me that my "girls" nights have more to do with getting away from the kids than from DH.
;)
I do enjoy 'away time' from my husband. Some people have commented, even, on how surprised they are that I will take vacations without him, just with girlfriends or whatever. Sometimes he just doesn't want to do the things I want to do and why would I make him suffer through stuff?
I went to Italy with a friend of mine for 9 days last year to climb and drink wine, and it seemed perfectly normal. I guess it's just whatever works for each couple.
ShootingStar, my DH enjoys drinking wine and beer, but those guys drank, if you understand... they did the same thing when we went to the dinner club that was part of this group, and their spouses were there. He was in his 40s at that point, so it was not a "young guy" socializing thing. Most of the men were older than him, too.
I would rather be with my DH than anyone else. We've been married for 31 years and I've always felt like this. I like to be alone at times, but only for short periods. While I've always been social and had lots of friends, I don't particularly want to be with them all of the time! I have no desire to "get away" or travel on my own. I have nothing to get away from.
Well it hasn't been quite like that. I was unemployed for nearly 18 months. While looking for work, he and I were together lots 24 hrs. x 7 x etc. which is why each of did do some solo cycling on our own several times each wk. Things just evolved that way nicely and then we cycled together whenever the local suituation/any trip suited. :)
Right now I'm in a different city than he because I found a job in a different province. (sigh...life just takes some wierd turns).
I wish I was at point in life to be travelling with him on the fly.....'causes he just learned last night he'll be going to CHINA by invitation, to speak on cycling matters this fall!! :eek: (Before he was scheduled for South Korea which he will be there too, but truncated.)
I am jealous. :rolleyes: But I am so glad I bit the bullet and went to Europe cycling, etc. for a month last summer. It was the best way to have used my accumlated air miles which I had been saving for ages. The trip had special meaning in addition to the great stuff we saw and experienced, since he has family in Germany.
Goldfinch, I wonder if my DH and I could handle an arrangement like you have. I think I would be so much happier - not so much because of being apart from him, as just having some physical stability and the ability to participate in activities that require some commitment.
Was it difficult for you to make that decision? Was being apart so long a hard adjustment for either of you?
My situation was different because we needed to spend time apart. After we both were retired we were in each other's face too much. Issues developed. It did not work out. Our interests are very different, much more so than in the early years of our marriage when we worked too much to have much of any outside interests.
I began hitting the road alone in the motorhome. He goes on retreats. We talk a minimum of three times a day so we know day in and day out how things are with each other. Now, I like the together times and the apart times.