Tell him you will not ride with him any more. Tell his friends not to ride with him.
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I like that.
It doesn't sound to me like she's developmentally ready to make the decision to wear the helmet for a goal in the future, though (too young). It's is my experience that behaviors and schemas completely flip-flopped or disappeared altogether in the space of three months or less. Rather than put her through all the screaming and fussing and anger, I'd just not take her for a few a weeks or months until the trauma of it subsides, and she can see it differently. That means mom or dad will have to be willing to stay home with her while the other pair gets to ride. That's okay. You're meeting your child's need, even when it conflicts with your own. (Isn't that was parenting is?)
Also, whenever I have conflict with my children, the conflict is usually rooted in one of two forces that are putting pressure on one or both of us: time or money. Time coercion is what causes drivers to speed past us on our bikes, screaming and cursing. Money coercion is what makes us frustrated when we can't afford that Salsa in the window.
The great thing with children, is that time is all we really have with them, even though it is limited and precious. I don't really have to make my child wear a helmet against his will if he's not ready. I'd rather spend that time doing more pleasant things until he is. If he agreed to wear the helmet and then couldn't keep it on for the whole ride--it'd be okay. I'd just turn around and go home, giving him a happy anticipation of doing something else fun together at home. I have found that when I meet their needs, they're more likely to be willing to meet those of others, too, including mine. Eventually. ;) I'm a grown-up. I can do without until then, in the interest of growing selfless children.
Karen
Yeah I'd stop riding with him. I don't want to be the one who has to frantically ride into cell coverage to call 911 to haul someone's butt out! I can sacrifice a jersey to stop bleeding, but uh, I don't want to be the first responder to a head injury.
I wish I still had the helmet I cracked. SadieKate can tell you all about my poorly executed showing off that did that. Fortunately the helmet cracked, not my skull, and only my pride was injured. I rode home humbled and humiliated, not in a helicopter. Oh why did she have to bring the hot racer boys? I would have been so mild mannered without them there.
+1 on not riding with him. I admit I don't know from mountain bikes, but I don't think the physics are any different from road bikes - and road bikes have a habit of throwing a person violently on their head.
I'm alive today (or at least rational) because of a helmet I was wearing when I stuck a pedal in a corner - as it was, I was out cold for 25 minutes. A couple of years ago I had a brain f*rt and rode off the edge of a bike path. Even though I was barely scraped and not even bruised, my head smacked the pavement pretty hard - enough that I had a headache the next day - and it would've been a significant TBI if I'd been bareheaded. It could as easily have been a log or a rock on an unpaved surface, or a paved path a MTBer would use to get to the trail.
Ditto what the others say about not riding with him. I'm here today b/c I was wearing my helmet when I went head-first into a tree while mountain biking. It's not just falls that warrant helmet wearing, but collisions too.
One guy I know was persuaded at the bike shop. Girlfriend asked him to get a helmet, he said no, bike shop employee asked him to put one on for just a second - wanted to show him something. Boyfriend puts on the helmet. Shop worker takes hammer (or other tool), whacks him on head. Then says, "okay, now let's do that without the helmet."
Boyfriend bought the helmet! :D
that's funny, but I hope they didn't sell him that particular helmet...
Ask him if he wants you to have to take care of him when he suffers a debillatating head injury.
Does he want you to worry yourself sick while he's hooked up to this and that in ICU?
Does he want you to have to drive him to daily physical therapy sessions?
The list goes on. sit his heiney down and have a serious chat.
OK. I'll give it a try! Thanks for the support.
It sure does:
Does he want to be supported by tax payers when he's a got a debilitating brain injury?
Does he want to have disfiguring scars?
here's a good thread from another board,
http://forums.mtbr.com/showthread.php?t=111566
not for the squeamish.
This guy was out riding his commuter in his nieghborhood ( much less on a trail)