Children's organized sports--helpful long-term afterwards?

http://calgaryherald.com/life/parent...perts-think-so

Some folks wondering if that having kids in organized sports might turn off some children later on, in life from exercise in general.
Well, only if the parents pay attention to the child, when child expresses dislike in the sport that they participating in. This is not necessarily easily to gauge, because a sport may be a bit challenging first but it does become obvious later, if the child is not motivated consistently or is getting injured too often. But child must feel comfortable expressing dislike/disinterest to parent(s).

I do support exposing children to broad range of sports where they learn and play it safely. I always hope that there is at least 1 sport/exercise that the child enjoys/naturally gravitates, gives them happy memories where later they will return to the sport as an adult for long-term enjoyment and health.

And thus, this is what cycling did for me.

I haven't read the article yet, but most organized sports for kids are team things where technical skill is highly necessary. Most of these are not sports you see adults playing in later life, i.e. soccer, baseball, football, ice hockey, gymnastics. I sucked at that kind of stuff as a kid, and while they didn't have much for girls when I was child in terms of team sports, we did do this stuff in PE. The one thing I consistantly did was ride my bike and play in the woods.My own kids did baseball and soccer. The oldest was great at baseball, but quit after 6th grade. Music became his "sport," specifically marching band. The other one was terrible at baseball, OK at soccer, quit both in gr. 5. He started running competitively in gr.7, mountain biking in gr. 8, and competitive road cycling in gr.9. He is really a superior athlete, to this day, but you never would have known it from the team sports. The cycling stuff was all done outside of school and a lot of work for him and us, but he loved it. I think the suffering aspect helped him in the military! The other one is also a very good endurance (cycling and running) athlete, and none of that was apparent as a child. He was a good swimmer then, but never competed. He also kayaked at camp and got quite good.

I didn't have too many friends who were in organized sports as kids. My best friend's dad, though, put a lot of pressure on both daughters to play soccer for the sake of soccer scholarships (mom was a bit saner in that regard--she thought it should be fun). Both were also in taekwondo. My best friend in particular had a number of ankle sprains that basically meant that by the time we graduated, she couldn't participate in either anymore. And most of these sports are pretty physically and/or technically demanding and aren't the sort of thing that one returns to later on (at least, most of the time).

Jr. high PE classes were what drove me to hate physical activity, actually. Run 3 miles, no walking, or you get a C for the day? Come on. But then, the only organized sport I participated in was fencing, which was thoroughly awesome. I'd like to go back, but a) I was really bad at it, and b) it's really expensive, and finding an organization is not the easiest thing in most cities.

I would never have discovered the joy of physical challenge if I hadn't been exposed to it in high school, I'm 100% sure of that.

I'm probably different from most though, because it was something I did against my parents. First to become physically strong as part of a fantasy of resistance, and soon after when I discovered I was good at soccer, as something that they placed zero value on, that could be mine without being appropriated by them.



ETA - just realized how that ties into my new sig line. Sweeeet. :)



OTOH, for DH, pretty much anything organized, including sports, became an occasion for bullying, and so he's not only pretty sedentary, but vehemently opposed to pretty much anything organized. Sigh. So, if you can glean anything from two people's completely opposite experiences, maybe it's that you can't generalize about any activity without knowing the specifics of the people involved.

I think it depends on the individual kids, the parents, and the coaches...and maybe somewhat on the sport as well. If there is too much pressure placed on kids, I can certainly see how it would stop being fun and potentially turn them off of physical activities. On a different but somewhat related note, my gripe with a lot of organized sports is the huge time commitment required, to the point where almost every weekend is taken up with games/practice. Not conducive to families getting to enjoy other activities together like going for a hike, bike ride etc. and doesn't allow much time for parents to occasionally have a break either. I don't remember having swim meets/practices on the weekends, other than the big state meet at the end of the summer; practice was on weekdays and meets were Tuesday and Thursday evenings. However, I have friends whose kids play soccer and it seems like every weekend during the season has a game or tournament...not sure if this is something that happens more in certain sports or if things have just changed that much in the last 10-15 years.

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Not conducive to families getting to enjoy other activities together like going for a hike, bike ride etc. and doesn't allow much time for parents to occasionally have a break either. I don't remember having swim meets/practices on the weekends, other than the big state meet at the end of the summer; practice was on weekdays and meets were Tuesday and Thursday evenings. However, I have friends whose kids play soccer and it seems like every weekend during the season has a game or tournament...not sure if this is something that happens more in certain sports or if things have just changed that much in the last 10-15 years.

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I'm beginning to seriously wonder if it's a generation thing. As a boomer, I don't recall at all, wealthier kids in my class joining any paid organized sport that wasn't organized by the school itself where practice is on school grounds. Sure, we did have informal gatherings of softball, baseball during recess and after school. Same for ice hockey since our school did have an outdoor rink. It was the kids organizing among themselves.

Closest might have been the rare child in my classes when went to hockey camp for a few weeks or a girl taking ballet or ballet lessons. I just remember a lot of loose time for us as children and during high school. Of course, some of us (not me) ended smoking and doing some drugs..but that still happens despite whatever else.

My partner who's family was poor as mine, is a bit older. So he only played with the boys informally ..ice hockey on a frozen natural pond, swimming in their lake down the street..biking about, hanging out.

My sister with 3 kids have been busy for last few years with her hubby, schlepping kids for soccer, then winter it's ice hockey. And for their daughter she takes an additional (because she really enjoys it), advanced gymnastics (forward, backward handsprings on the mat, parallel bars, etc.). However I'm sure this will naturally stop when they get into their late teens. Will be interesting for the daughter..how long she sticks with gymnastics, she's at an age where her body is quite elastic and where she is fearless (14 yrs.). I just hope her mother, my sister will guide her daughter from becoming obsessed about remaining model thin which gymnastics has a tendency to cultivate in some girls.

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Originally Posted by Jolt

I think it depends on the individual kids, the parents, and the coaches...

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especially parents and coaches!!

There are ways to make a child’s sports experience positive and ways to make it negative.

My parents always promoted the idea of not defining success and failure in sports as winning and losing. It was about challenging myself and seeking improvement. Failure could be a gift to be viewed in a positive way as a source of motivation to improve. Their positive guiding and support instead of criticism helped me enjoy a couple of sports and especially martial arts when I was growing up and now all my physical activities. I’d say my ability to be completely absorbed in the here and now of challenging my limits in a hard physical effort reflects very well on their early guidance. Hopefully I'll do as well with a child I have.

Now if a child is taught it IS just about winning and losing and losing is failure, if a parent or coach uses anger to deal with losing, if the goals of a parent are more important than a child’s, if criticism is used instead of positive motivation and if self esteem is harmed by degradation and humiliation etc. etc….then you get the negativity that you’ve put into it.

All true ... and all to do with parenting, nothing to do with sports. Many of those are reasons I don't play music any more. I miss it a lot, but it's just too fraught. And in contrast, as I said, they're why I did take to athletics - because it was something I could do free of all that.

Music was extremely competitive in the community where my kids went to school. Older son started lessons/band in gr. 5 and we moved to music crazy place when he was in gr. 7. I was shocked when he came home the first day and said he needed to find an instructor for private lessons, that we had to pay for! In our former town, the lessons were free, given by the band director. He was told he probably wouldn't make it, as a transfer student. Unbeknownst to me, he actually had talent, so he did. At one HS band concert, I heard parents complaining their kid would never make "1st" in their instrument, as all of the others had been taking lessons at the New England Conservatory since age 4. That was not far from being true.
When DS #2 was in gr. 7, taking compulsory music elective, he failed a test. He did not play an instrument. He failed the test because he could not read music... I called the teacher, who did not believe me when I said he did not play an instrument, and that, well, I could care less if he did. The teacher was incredulous, especially since, as he mentioned, his brother was talented. I had to threaten, but DS was allowed to re-take the test.