Can't make up my mind - new cat

We want to get a companion for Her Royal Siamese-ness and have waaay too many choices. Over Christmas we tried with a beautiful long-haired, formerly feral female tabby from a local rescue group. Since Taffy is very spoiled, we thought it might be a good idea to get one that really liked other cats by wasn't overly attached to humans. I won't go into the long story of why it didn't work out, but we ended up returning the poor thing before her health suffered from being cornered on top of the kitchen cabinets by our cat. It's possible Taffy was merely curious, but by that time it didn't matter - this high strung tabby was so frightened she couldn't calm down. She kept getting out of the bedroom we were keeping her in because she was used to a busy shelter with lots going on, but our little monster kept chasing her into new hiding places... sigh.
So now we're looking for something a little bit more people-friendly. We have the choices of a 10 year old black male (Taffy is coming up on 14), a 3 year old but reputedly very laid back male (also jet black), another 3 year old orange-buff male that likes other cats, a timid little orange female that our cat sitter is rescuing (likes people but still don't know if she's cat-friendly), a big five year old blue-point siamese that is sort of an alpha male but gets on with most cats... Just too many to choose from. I get the feeling a male might be a better bet.
Another siamese would be lovely, but I also like black cats... and the orange-buff one looks like a big teddy bear.
It was easy picking Taffy - she just batted her big blue eyes at my husband and he was putty in her paws. Just pure good luck she regarded our old male tabby as an oversized kitten that needed frequent ear-washing.

I'm a sucker for Siamese and would have a house full of them if my partner didn't keep me in check, so you know my vote. Both of ours are shelter kitties.

I don't know if this really means anything. But, I had two Maine coons and I know they would never have let any other cat in the house, but perhaps a young kitten or 6 month old. They always seemed to treat a young kitten or 6 month old different than an adult cat. Maybe it is a behavior that helps keep babies alive among other cats.

Now, my two maine coons are gone. So, I adopted a 5-6 year old black cat that hates other cats, fights with every cat in the neighborhood! However, I brought a found stray about 6 month tabby into the house and he accepted him, even though reluctantly. I do not think he would ever have accepted a full grown cat.

So, maybe try a young 6 month cat, slowly get them used to each other and maybe it will work

I second the 6mos or under kitten. My elderly cat passed away when my littler one was about a bit over a year or so old. He seemed rather lonely so we decided a companion right away might be for the best. He accepted the kitten completely even without the careful intro - in fact it was impossible to keep them apart even though we tried. Neither of them care for other cats if they see them outside, but they are pretty good friends. They sleep together and everything.

As active as Taffy still is, I'm inclined to think a kitten might be too much for a 14 year old. She did get on with our old male when we introduced them two years ago (he was 18 at the time, lost his sister a few years earlier) but was perhaps a little too energetic for him.
I think she'd like a dog even more, but we're not prepared to get one at this time. She's made friends with two of the dogs that we encounter on our walks, so it's possible she lived with one before.
The orange female that our cat-sitter has rescued is probably out too. Although this one is much more handle-able than the tabby was, another very timid cat would probably be a bad idea.
The advantage of the local rescue group that we got Taffy from is, they have the cats living in people's homes or their own shelter so they can see if they get on well with others. The disadvantage, as we discovered with the tabby, is that after they've lived in this shelter or a foster home for more than a few years, they start to see it as home and it's a wrench to them to live in a new home. When the tabby was returned, she went back to business as usual at the shelter, grooming her boyfriend... it was a relief to know we hadn't traumatized her permanently but it also told us that she probably wouldn't accept another home easily unless the boyfriend (yet another jet black cat!) went with her.

I have 5 cats right now. Have had as many as 7. The easiest to introduce to my older and aloof cats were the kittens. Another older cat with a well established personality is harder. No matter what Taffy may never really be friends with another cat. But what you are looking for is another cat that can hold it's own but also doesn't really NEED the other cat to like her. So I recommend younger is better.

K

I've fostered lots of newborn kittens. And have way too many failed to be adopted cats. If you were to bring in a full grown male, its possible that Taffy may start marking the house to show the other cat that its his turf. Bringing in a adult male is going to be harder than a young one. If the new male is strong willed, Taffy could get stalked and emotionally stressed. Young neutered male or spayed female (kitten) will be easier to integrate and less chance for Taffy to start misbehaving.

Integrating two adult male can be done but its lot more work. Sometimes, you only get to uneasy truce between the two.

You will also need to get a second litter box. Taffy has his own. He think it belongs to him and not to any new cat. Second litter box should be made available when you bring home a new cat. Also have several water bowls elsewhere in the house so that Taffy isn't protecting his "watering hole". And you will need a second food bowl just for the new cat. All for the same reason. What belongs to Taffy is HIS! Eventually, they will share the litter box and the water bowl. food bowl should be kept separate.

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Originally Posted by smilingcat

I've fostered lots of newborn kittens. And have way too many failed to be adopted cats. If you were to bring in a full grown male, its possible that Taffy may start marking the house to show the other cat that its his turf. Bringing in a adult male is going to be harder than a young one. If the new male is strong willed, Taffy could get stalked and emotionally stressed. Young neutered male or spayed female (kitten) will be easier to integrate and less chance for Taffy to start misbehaving.

Integrating two adult male can be done but its lot more work. Sometimes, you only get to uneasy truce between the two.

You will also need to get a second litter box. Taffy has his own. He think it belongs to him and not to any new cat. Second litter box should be made available when you bring home a new cat. Also have several water bowls elsewhere in the house so that Taffy isn't protecting his "watering hole". And you will need a second food bowl just for the new cat. All for the same reason. What belongs to Taffy is HIS! Eventually, they will share the litter box and the water bowl. food bowl should be kept separate.

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Taffy is a female, and she adapted well to our old cat, as well as to other cats at the clinic where she was boarded after her first owner went into a nursing home. (By coincidence she lived nearby and used the same clinic as us, so StreetCats boarded her there as a temporary thing.)
We do have a second litter box, we bought it when we were trying to introduce the first tabby, and we plan to keep the new cat in the downstairs spare bedroom for a few days and introduce them gradually by alternately brushing them with the same brush. It worked the first time around, just not with the tabby we took in over Christmas, as she was too nervous and hid from us.

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Originally Posted by katluvr

I have 5 cats right now. Have had as many as 7. The easiest to introduce to my older and aloof cats were the kittens. Another older cat with a well established personality is harder. No matter what Taffy may never really be friends with another cat. But what you are looking for is another cat that can hold it's own but also doesn't really NEED the other cat to like her. So I recommend younger is better.

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She was depressed after Merlin passed away, and only brightened up when summer came and we could take her outside for walks... sometimes several times a day. In November we were able to compensate for the seasonal change with play, but eventually she got bored and mopey again. She is used to other animals, including other cats, and we do think she'd appreciate the right sort of companion. She had other animals in her life in the past, in her old home.

We've taken the plunge and are trying out the blue point Siamese. So far, so good, just a little swearing in the middle of the night when he got too close to Taffy, but otherwise they're cautiously checking each other out and have touched noses. Nothing timid about this boy, he's been checking out the whole house.
He's been a bit of a surprise so far. First surprise - he actually appears to be a Siamese, not a colourpoint mixed breed cat with Siamese ancestry like Taffy. Mind you, he doesn't have the baby-cry voice, so perhaps he isn't completely purebred.
Second surprise - he's HUGE. Only 12 pounds, but long and stretched out, like a panther. When I've seen purebred Siamese at cat shows, they always looked like really small cats. We had to swap a plastic storage tote for the litter box we'd bought for the previous cat as he couldn't fit in with the cover on and hurled litter all over the furness room with it off.

Congrats and excellent choice! Ours are Siamese mixes from the pound. Both are talkers. I absolutely love the breed. Our male is a moose. I have weighed him in awhile, but if I had to guess I'd say 15lbs

Success, I think. She isn't afraid of him, but hasn't tried to kill him yet - despite his weird obsession with her litter box. He'll poke his head in and start burying her waste (she leaves it on top). Yesterday he tried to do that while she was still in there and she chased him upstairs and took a swing at him.
By nightfall she'd forgiven him enough to tolerate him near her on the bed.
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Beautiful kitties! Glad it's working out.

Congratulations!! Hopefully things will continue to work out.

Beautiful. We really had great success with our most recent adoptee, too. It helps that she wasn't a tiny baby and that our boys are both fairly laid-back. She's not the least bit of a harasser, either. Now she and our younger male are buddies and tear around the house. Good thing, since he suddenly packed-on weight after his former feline BFF suddenly became ill and passed away. I think he had taken to grief eating and his activity levels without his friend were down to 0.

Beautiful. Loved the 2 cats.