Anniversary Party ideas?

I'm planning a surprise party for my parent's 40th wedding anniversary. My brother got a great deal at a banquet hall downtown in an old piano factory. It has the exposed brick, columns, view of the waterfront, . . . it's a nice place. We're expecting 45-50 guests, some are coming from out of town for the weekend.

Just wondering if we should have some kind of schedule of sorts?

I'm guessing we do a toast.
Should there be a game?
There is a cash bar. Not sure if people will dance, but there is a dance floor.

I'm nervous about 50 people showing up and having them all stare at me with expectation.

Also, I was thinking it might be nice to host a brunch the following day for the out-of-town guests. Except that I live 30 minutes away in the next town over. I don't want to put the guests out by making them drive further . . . but I thought it would be nice for them to get extra visiting time with my parents since they traveled all the way here.

We had photos on display at my parents' 50th anniversary party. I think there were some photo albums from their wedding, plus some collages of them over the years, many of which included kids, grandchildren and close friends.

We had cards for people to write something to them, which were set out in advance at each of the tables. My sister-in-law put together a scrapbook afterwards which I think includes the cards (or a selection of them maybe, I don't know since she only finished it recently and I haven't seen it yet).

The food was buffet style so there was no assigned seating.

My brother gave a speech, as did the best man.

We had a boom box paying CDs for music.

There was lots of picture-taking -- various combinations of family members, wedding party, etc.

I went around and took photos of most of the guests as they were sitting at the tables chatting. My mother appreciated this, since she had not been able to get her own photos of many of those folks.

For the cake, the bakery decorated it with a copy of their wedding picture. It was on something edible, made from rice I think?

How old are your parents? I know it shouldn't be a determining factor, but some of us might ....actually be that age :rolleyes: ..and would be able to give a sense of what is cool/not cool these days.

Start with: What do your parents like to do together as a couple in terms of hobbies/interests? And with some of their friends? If you know their friends like dancing, then have some music with small dance space. Are your parents outgoing? (Mine aren't, they are introverted. :rolleyes:)

This is if you run out of ideas aside from some retrospective on their marriage --how they met, their wedding day, etc.

That might help you add some stories or determine a theme for party dinner.

This sounds lovely, and the brunch will be a nice opportunity for some of the guests to visit with your parents in a more intimate setting.

Only one thing though - I'd not have a cash bar. If people are coming from out of town, spending the weekend in motels, it's not so nice to make them pay for their drinks. Better to foot the bill for the drinks, or to reduce the offerings. You could limit it to beer, wine, & soft drinks. If the hall will allow you to bring in your own liquor you can control costs better that way, but do have a bartender - either a volunteer, or hired. Alternatively think about reducing the size of your guest list so that you can still have a gracious event and stay within your budget.

My parents are mid-sixties. They are pretty social. My mom is involved in lots of groups: bell choir at church, several card playing groups, and she has a group of friends she travels with. My dad is a talker :) If he has someone to listen to him, he's a happy guy.

I really wish we could afford to do an open bar . . . but we just can't. Perhaps we could provide the champagne for the toast at least? I'll look into it. That's why I thought a brunch the next morning might be a good idea.

An open bar can get pricey really quickly! I think a cash bar is fine. It sounds like a lovely, modest event; if I were invited to an event like that, I would not expect an open bar. I would make non-alcoholic drinks available for free, however.

Music from your parent's playlist would be good. Find out what music they had at their wedding, and what their first dance song was. They should be encouraged to dance to that song, alone, just like at the wedding.

Definitely have photos displayed of their wedding.

A toast would be good, but no games in my opinion. Games force people into participating, when some would rather observe. I always feel games are awkward and forced in these sorts of gatherings (showers and parties).

I wouldn't get too structured, since alot of the guests will probably enjoy catching up with each other and relaxing. Having a buffet dinner is a great idea, or at least heavy hors d'oevres with plenty of tables and seats. Walking around trying to talk and eat and balance a glass is never a good idea.

The brunch is also a lovely idea. A 30-minute drive is nothing these days; people drive that far to go to the grocery store. The people who want to come to that will; the others won't. It might be very nice for your parents to have an opportunity to connect with some of the guests more than they could at the larger gathering.

It's very thoughtful of you (and your siblings?) to celebrate with your parents.

Are you comfortable being a ham in front of an audience? You could build a fun skit around a hand of cards...where each card represents..a point in their married lives..

a prelude to the toast.

Just a thought, since your parents sound like wonderful, sociable people and would take that sort of thing well.

When we hosted my parents 50th we bought inexpensive mismatched but same color frames on line and used three framed photo's on each table and a small vase of fresh flowers as centerpieces.We let any guest who wanted a photo take one home. It was great for the grandkids to have a wedding photo of their grandparents.
We also made Italian wedding cookies and put them in clear cellophane bags with a photo sticker to hold the bag closed, each place setting was set with a bag of cookies.
My brothers friend acted as a DJ and we played my parents song and music from their era. there was some dancing. My oldest brother and several volunteers toasted but mostly people seemed to just enjoy socializing with old friends.
I hope this helps, have a great party.

That is very helpful! Thank you everyone. My parents have a lot of friends and they are all very gabby and social--you're right in that they don't need me to entertain them with games :) That makes me feel better.

I'm going to look into providing champagne on the tables for a toast. And I'm going to move forward with the brunch the next day.

This is going to be fun :D

Two weeks to the party and everything is starting to come together. Looks like we'll be able to afford Beer and Wine for everyone. I was able to get some inexpensive decorations from Hobby Lobby's 60% off sale.

My dad pulled me aside the other day just to let me know that their 40th anniversary is coming up and I should get them a card , you know, because mom is sensitive about this stuff.;)

Surprisingly, my brother is being very helpful. I feel like I'm planning a wedding except this is more stressful. My wedding was immediate family only with a pot-luck at my parents.