What exactly is a "small meal"?

I'm seeing a personal trainer who believes that, with my level of activity, I should easily be eating 2000 calories a day, maybe even 2500 in the summer when I really kick up my riding. I'd say that I'm really probably averaging 1600-1800 calories. Probably less. Breakfast is usually some protein, usually canadian bacon or turkey bacon, just two slices, a 1/4 cup of egg whites or egg beaters, a glass of skim milk, and a piece of wheat bread with a bit of nutella. Lunch is usually lettuce wraps, a salad, or something along those lines. Dinner is usually ground turkey of some sort, veggies, usually no carbs, or brown rice if I've had a good workout. In between, I snack on fruit, maybe yogurt. Sometimes a handful of nuts. After I eat, I'm usually hungry around 2 hours later. I drink enough water to float me around the world. How can I get more of the "right" calories in? What are other options for healthy "small meals"?

I should mention that I see a personal trainer once a week, and ride at least 4 days a week (averaging 17mph for about 20 miles), longer rides on the weekends, and running on my "off" days. I know that seems like a 10 day week, but it varies from week to week :)

What say you, oh wise ones?

There are lots of websites that help you track calories (fat, protein, carbs, whatever) pretty quickly.
I like the dailyplate
http://www.thedailyplate.com/

Just looking up your breakfast, you are at ~ 300 calories

Don't forget your in between snacks, etc. Fruit is wonderful, but carries a big calorie punch.
I write down everything that goes in my mouth - even if I have coffee and add a tbs of milk - try that for a month and you'd be surprised how easy it starts to become. If you are creature of habit, use excel or similar so you can cut/paste the stuff you eat a lot and not have to look it up everytime.

What are you trying to accomplish? Lose weight? Fuel your existing activities?

Lose weight while fueling for my activities.

I take one of my usual meals (a wrap or sandwich with veggie protein, cheese, veggies) and cut it in half. I eat one half for lunch, and the other half in an hour or two. I just make/eat the same amount and space them out more.

I follow the Zone Diet (diet meaning lifestyle eating, not "lose weight"), which says to at protein, carb and fat at every meal and snack. It specifies the number of grams of each. So for me, an example of a meal might be 3 oz chicken, loads of green veggies, and a dash of monunsaturated fat like 1 tsp olive oil or a few macadamia nuts.

A snack might be an ounce of low fat cheese and half an apple.

I found this way of eating after a long ride and deciding that I needed to find a better way to fuel my body, while also losing excess fat. Sounds like similar goals to you!

For me, 'small meals' are basically all my meals. I try to keep my three 'main' meals at 300 - 400 calories and then I add in at least two other meals that are in the 200 - 300 range. Total calories for the day is 1300 - 1600 depending on my activity level. For me, the biggest factor is WHAT I am eating. Right now, with active weight loss actually happening, I am sticking to 40% of my calories from protien, 40% from carbs (mostly veggies/fruit and 1 whole grain serving per day) and 20% from healthy fats. All food is as unprocessed as possible and 95% of it is cooked at home.

I log my food religiously for 5 days (weekdays) and then on the weekends, I aim to eat the same types of meals but I give myself a break from logging. I didn't intend to start this way, but I do feel like it keeps me from feeling like this way of eating is unsustainable. Balance is key for me.

So far, this is working (it's been three weeks). I've got plenty of energy for my workouts (training for a tri) and I'm not starving nor am I thinking about food all day. The best part is that I am steadily losing...something that I haven't been able to do effectively in the past 4 years.

You could try something similiar but just increase your calories by either adding an extra small meal or increasing them all a bit in size until you get to your 1800/day that your trainer recommends.

Why are you avoiding carbs?

Whole grain cereal with skim milk is a good meal or snack, depending on how much you eat.

Whole grain crackers with peanut butter or fruit.

Really, just small portions of whatever healthy foods that you like. Fruits, vegetables, whole grains, lean protein. Take a slow walk around the grocery store and look for ideas.

I must admit that I have not yet logged my meals (+calories) yet. Ever.
Even though I do go through annual time periods where I do gain some weight because of less cycling in winter, etc. Then by increasing cycling in warmer seasons, I lose the winter "insulation". :)

In reading how others do this plus discipline themselves mindfully to eat balanced meals, I wonder about myself since being on this forum.

In the past I have cycled approx. same distance or abit a more, several times per week on weekdays for several months that is the same as tongue tied. Usually a ride of that length in our area, means at minimum a hill or more, 6-10% grade. then weekends, it's longer daily rides.

I rarely eat any protein for breakfast (maybe I should) except when I'm on vacation somewhere. Breakfast usually includes: a half cup or more of oatmeal with milk, tea with milk and maybe with fresh fruit.

Then towards ends of cycling I end up drinking a coffee with milk, snack of a biscotti or similar.

Throughout the day I drink several cups of coffee or tea depending where I am. Snack on a slice of bread, raisins/fresh fruit.

Supper isn't exactly small but does include a light pasta or brown/red rice /couscous with veggies/fistful of seafood or chicken breast. At this time, I've been eating supper at better time, meaning approx. before 7:00 pm which is way better than a few yrs. ago.

What I should consider is how to deal with lunch since I either choose to have a big lunch or supper. Of course, the obvious ...is bigger lunch is better/more logical.

Do I want to start counting calories? For myself, no. This will make me overly conscious about eating/food and put me in state of mind that I don't need. I don't need to lose weight but over time maybe think about rebalancing meals abit.

It took me...um..several years to even eat the type of breakfast that I do now.

tongue_tied, what I'm seeing lacking in your summary is fats. Not only do you need healthy fats to lose weight, but eating more fat should help with satiety too. Have whole pasture-raised eggs or a handful of nuts at breakfast, and/or a larger dollop of real nut butter in place of the nutella; have half an avocado in your lunch salad, saute your dinner in olive oil, or have some oily fish, etc.

JMO, no professional qualifications here, just knowing what I read and what my own body needs.

We generally eat from smaller plates.