Balloon tired cruisers

Holy Toledo.
I think I'm spoiled by a custom ti/carbon bike.
I'm at a 3-day seminar in the VA countryside, and the center has bikes we can use for cruising around the 2700 acre property. My room is in the converted stables on the "north campus." Too far to walk (in 90 degree heat and pumps), too close to drive to the daily sessions.
Perfect for a bike. Just grab one off the rack and go.
The bikes are no name balloon tire single speed cruisers (complete with coaster brakes and a saddle the size of a Barcalounger). I'm in "business casual" attire. VA contryside is rolling.
Ugh. This is harder than I thought! I tried to stand up on a hill and nearly fell over!!!
I think I gotta find the short cuts or this has an opportunity to be painful. :o:rolleyes:

When on vacation in Maine last year, we rented some poorly assembled K2 mountain bikes and rode them on the road. OMG! We thought we'd die!

Once, I stood on a hill and I did go straight to the pavement! I guess you have more skill than me...

In 2004 we rented mountain bikes in Siena, Italy, where we were visiting our older son. The shop owner mapped out a nice 25 mile route for us. The bikes were poorly maintained and the gears on mine barely worked. My husband had to do some serious patch work so I could get into the lowest gears. Good thing, because after a lovely lunch in Chianti, we decided to see where a road went. We missed the turn back to Siena and up we went. Up and up and up... until it was 20 degrees cooler and we could see TV towers at the top of endless switchbacks. Even my husband got off and started walking until we were able to flag down a French guy who was flying down the mountain. With a little discussion in English, Spanish, Italian, and French, any words I could remember in any language, he was able to tell us we were 3 km from the top and how to get back to the place we were meeting the shop guy to pick us up. When we called him, he said, "You did what? On those bikes?"
It turns out this was part of the Giro route that year. Good thing I ate a big pasta lunch. I had only been riding a road bike for a year!