Your social circles & their exercise/health

Went out with a bunch of women at lunch where we had lunch in a park. We got there by car...it must have been 8-9 kms. away from workplace. The women themselves, are in their early 40s to late 50s. Generally good spirited but they did ..complain abit about walking much when car had to be parked a bit further away due to full parking lot, etc.

It suddenly occurred to me that by coincidence, (not because of cycling connections), that all of my closest long-standing friends and most of my family members, like to at least walk, do some form of exercise (not always regular).and would have not complained walking along for at least over an hr. in pleasant,warm weather on flat surface. My mother would ..because of her gout.

I am talking about over 20 family members..course much younger nieces and nephews might complain. Course we are all getting older, but still..most of us in good walking and...even general health status.

And the long-standing friends that I mentioned, are friends I've had many years before I took up cycling and still maintain great friendships...several over 25 yr. long friendships. So the original basis for such friendships, were never based on/related to anything on sport nor health.

I just have not socialized consistently with people who find even walking much abit of a chore. And when they did complain...it was abit grating. I mean these women are in my age range...

I don't say anything when they start to complain.. they all know I cycle, etc.

I am in the same situation. I have 2 close friends from before I started cycling. However, I was a gym rat and taught aerobics, walked, etc. was very active. That seemed to be more "acceptable" to people, especially since I mostly was at the gym at 5:30 AM and it didn't interfere with other plans. One of these friends plays tennis, but is always complaining about how out of shape she is. She walks her dog like 4 times a day, so she isn't inactive. But all she does is talk about what she "used" to do... run, hike. Her excuse is her son, who is 17 and almost a senior in HS. Friend #2 is heavy and makes a lot of excuses, but she recently started walking (again). She actually understands what I do and is supportive. Our closest friends are our cycling buddies. We ride, hike, x country ski, and snow shoe with them. We met them on a ride in our club (she's a leader, also) and it turned out we had actually seen them around and said a casual hi to them for years at the gym and riding around town.We go on vacations with them, go to theatre, and out to eat. We live about 5 miles apart. They don't have kids and ours are grown, so it's a good match. There are still a lot of people my age (54) who have kids at home and seemed to be way too wrapped up in that.
I have grown somewhat intolerant of those who don't lead the same type of life style. I wish I could find more close friends who have the same interests. The one thing that's happened, which is a little upsetting is that I don't too much at my synagogue anymore. Most of the social things, speakers, events are on Sundays and I am always busy cycling or skiing...
of course that's not an excuse to not attend religious services, but I find myself just sitting and observing all of the people my age who are so out of shape and getting worse!

I often say "It's nice to get a chance to walk for a bit," as if in complete ignorance of the fact that they are actually complaining. Often they stop and say "I guess so".

I work in the med school which is attached to the hospital. There is a very close parking garage for the doctors. Everyone else parks in the staff parking lot which is a bit of a hike. When they started construction, the staff parking lot was closed, and staff now have to park about 1/4 mile away. This didn't involve bike racks, so it doesn't affect me.

Staff complained bitterly about the distance. And I personally really hate the "doctors are gods" mentality. However, I've heard more than one person say they've lost weight since the parking changed.

When I lived in L.A. most of the socializing was over dinner or at a bar. Where I'm living now it's much more common to say, "Let's go for a hike/bike/snowshoe, etc." This is the healthiest place I've ever lived. Since coming up here I've lost, and kept off, 20 pounds.

I guess I'm noticing this "divide" abit more amongst same age group peers...it must be the aging process.

None of my age cohort friends ride. None of them run or swim or work out either. Ah well. I have been starting to hang out with the 30 somethings at work.

Very interesting question. People at work actually seem pretty active--they do a lot of different stuff and we talk about it.

I have one very close friend who doesn't like to do the same things I do, but she does work out. She's also really skinny naturally and hardly has to do a thing to lose 10 pounds. :rolleyes: My other close friend is getting a bit unhealthy :(. She has a lot of pressure with kids and ex-husband in her life. We have run a couple of 5ks together, though.

I'm not sure what I would do without my bike club....although I do enjoy running on my own. I definitely need the challenge of people pushing me when I bike. I would noodle a lot if I didn't.

Other friends who are not active I have a pile of stuff in common with, so it's not a problem...although one of those who cooks tends to pressure me to eat more than I'd like sometimes.

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Originally Posted by kelownagirl

None of my age cohort friends ride. None of them run or swim or work out either. Ah well. I have been starting to hang out with the 30 somethings at work.

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Well, honest...this is why living in gated retirement communities..unless I am genuinely frail-old and wheelchair bound, will not be for me. Hear more about people complaining about their health..particularily about problems..that if they did try abit of physical activity, would be abit different result. Unless one hangs out with post 60's touring cycling groups. They do exist and they are highly active, vibrant group.

Fitness or health is not a criteria for friendship, more like openness to try new learning life experiences and if you're mobile/physically independent, count your blessings....and use it!

I do have a close friend a year older than I, who must drive for jobs, manage her cottage, etc. But enjoys walking for exercise in her small town of 2,000. She walks by herself...because she cannot find anyone to do it. And she's single. She did her walking even when she cared for her mother for several years with Alzheimer's.

I like to walk and do other active things, and so do a lot of my friends and co-workers, but I still might complain if I had to walk far from car to destination. I guess it's just a bad habit. On nicer days I don't typically mind; if it's cold, though, I get whiny.

Well, it certainly is an issue with my age group peers, but looking at my almost 26 year son's friends, they aren't too active, either. One of the groups I ride with is a mostly older group that is part of one of the clubs I belong to. They are all older than me on the most part and they are awesome. I hope I can be riding as much as they do in 10 or 20 years. I think I mentioned that last summer one of the rides was led by an 86 year old guy! The problem is that I am still working, so I don't get to ride with them that often. Once school is out, I will be able to ride with them more often because I am going back to school in the fall. I purposely planned my class schedule so I would have Wednesdays free. Maybe then I can get to know some of them better. It's a huge group, so I would guess there's a few people that I could connect with.
At work, I also have more in common with some of the 30 somethings.