My own stupidity

So today I was biking to the bike shop on our fabulous Midtown Greenway, a wonderful bike/ pedestrian pathway through a rather traffic/ construction infested part of town. I was at a crossing and all of the cars stop and the lights are flashing to stop for pedestrians. Well long story short one car didn't stop, one of my tires is a taco, and I'm just a little bruised and scatched up. An officer was at the scene in two shakes, I think she was heading down the street to begin with. I didn't press charges just because I wasn't hurt and the man agreed to pay for the repairs. We head on to the few blocks to the bike shop and I am in the officers car and I learn that she is a fellow cyclist with a $10 garage sale bike and a $3000 carbon trek. Alright it was great to relate but she couldn't stick around the bike shop, you know she has to protect the streets and all. But we are at the shop and the jerk who broke my wheel won't even pay for the wheel replacement that is equal to the one I have. I am angry we start arguing. Alright fine. Then fill out this form the office gave me in the car. Okay no? The bike shop gal said the police department is just down the street. Bad man snaps at her. This guy got off easy. He didn't stop for a pedestrian cross walk, I'm not pressing charges, I just want the $60 for a new tire. We is giving me the worst sort of grief and I am sick of his ugly mug. I send him out of my sight. I shouldn't have done that, i should have called the officer back. What the heck was I thinking. I am so stupid.

I'm so glad you're okay! That's the most important part. However, I feel your pain in your "what was I thinking"! I know I make not so great decisions sometimes when I'm "in the moment". I sold my bedroom furniture for much less than I should have because the people who showed up ready to haul it away happened to "only have x amount of dollars on them" and the bank was closed, etc. I gave in because I wanted the furniture gone, but later thought, "Why didn't I just tell them to come back the next day with rest of the money and I'd be happy to let them take my furniture!"

I'm wondering if you could still press charges ... if you have changed your mind. The officer must have gotten his information. I would have probably been like you and not wanted to file charges, but yet how maddening it must be that he wouldn't even pay for what the tire was worth. Maybe he needs to be taught a lesson.

But again ... glad you're okay. :)

Pleased to hear you are ok, MS, but very very angry with this guy.

I agree with Jiffer... go back to the cop - she will remember you, and get her to help you through the process!

Don't let this guy get away with it HIS stupidity...

It's probably not too late to press charges. What a jerk!
I'm happy to hear you're ok but are you sure you don't have knee problems or something ?wink wink
I get so mad at this stuff:mad:

First, I'm glad you are okay.

Second, contact the officer and ask her for some help.

Third, can you take this guy to small claims court? Ask the officer to supply a written statement.

He gave me $40 and refused to do more. I tried to remind him of what just happened and our agreement. He started talking lawyer (who just happened to be on the scene) and I should have called the officer back. I think taking the money was my mistake but at the time I was like $40 is better than nothing. I really should have called the officer and she would have been right back.

Call the officer anyway
Get her advice

You don't have a peice of paper anywhere saying that the $40 was "full and final settlement" and you haven't signed such a document either.

It was a down payment on the original understanding you made in good faith - that he would replace your wheel for the actual cost.

Good faith verbal agreements can stand up in a court of law over here...

You also have the arguament of being in shock - you were the victim - your body was dealing with the stress of a near miss.

Contact the officer - she will remember - she will empathise... call her...

This guy is a bully.

Please call the officer.

Call the officer. The driver is a @#$ and was taking advantage of you. The officer will be able to tell you what your next step should be.

Thank you guys, I thought that calling her back would be another stupid move because I didn't take the right steps initially and that each decision I made left her less and less to work with. I did call her but it was too late and she didn't answer. I will call again before work and during my break tomorrow.

I usually keep things together. My bestfriend has never seen me cry. I just don't cry in front of people but the bike store got a lot today. They were really sympathetic and although I have never purchased anything before they have seen me in the store every now and then. If I ever get it together they will be seeing a lot of me.

Processing this has been really hard. The shock has worn off and I am feeling that knee that got whacked with the Cro- Moly pipe. But worse I don't want to bike. You know how you eagerly await the call from the bike shop saying your bike is done. I am not. That means I have to ride it home. I don't know how to do that. I figured this out when I was I was thinking of how I get to work in the morning and that is usually bike. Mine is in the shop but I do have a spare I cleaned up for a friend but she has not recieved yet. But then I realized I don't want to bike. I would rather walk 4 times slower and get up at 5:30 instead of 6:00 than bike.

Hang in there mads. Don't let this single bad experience taint your perspective on things. The anger and apprehension you feel are normal...let them process...let them pass.

I'm very glad your injuries weren't worse.

madscot, I know how you feel. Meeting bad people in traffic is such a confidence killer, and not wanting to ride really sucks...

If you can, try to make the next rides easy on yourself. Get up earlier (or go in later) to miss traffic, try to have plenty of time, try biking in with all the time in the world just to keep your pedals turning. Stop and have a coffee on the way. Have somebody ride with you.

Hope your knee and psyche heal well!

Mads, it's ok to walk, or even take the bus. You're hurting, both mentally and physically. It's reasonable to not want to ride with a busted knee. So give yourself a bit of time for your knee to heal. The backup bike will be there after work.

You're beating yourself up a *lot* over this. You weren't stupid. You trusted that the guy would do what he said he would do. That is a reasonable thing to trust in. The accident wasn't your fault either. You need to be gentler with yourself! You were doing the right kinds of things the whole way through the incident. Now you know for next time to just press charges, but really that's the only thing to change. Pressing charges will help you some, but more importantly, the driver will have the accident on their record. If they ever hit another cyclist or pedestrian, the criminal justice system will have more leverage.

It's also ok to cry. It's part of being human. You may want or need to cry a lot in the next few weeks. You're allowed. It's a way of dealing with stress.

1. Charge the guy.

2. Did you get his insurance information?

3. Contact your own lawyer.

4. Go to the doctor.

You are being WAY too hard on yourself! Even the thread title is unnecessarily self-deprecating. Just take it easy, and you'll be back into riding in no time. The guy was a total ***. You didn't do anything wrong at all. You were shaken up as you should have been, and were disgusted with him as you should have been, and that's that. Now that he's been such a jerk, he deserves charges brought against him. You should absolutely pursue it. I'm sure it's not too late. Teach him a lesson!

And, again, don't be mean to yourself. You rock!