Imaz 07, Version Dnf.0

Well we all know how it ends, but as I was speaking to my adopt an IM kids today, it came to mind that there was a lot more to that day than just the DNF. So I thought I would share my IMAZ experience with you. The good, bad,the sad and ugly... :(

Ok first off race week was killer. It seems that most of the participants are also you tube viewers, as I was constantly being stopped and asked if I was "the" Denise from the you tube video. It was kind of comical and weird all at the same time. Now I know how famous people feel to constantly have people staring at you with that "are you...." look on their face. And hearing the "is that the girl from the you tube video" whispers. It was something.

Another cool pre race thing was meeting Laura (knappalaura) at the race dinner. I was on my own for the race dinner, so I asked if I could sit with her and her mom. They were very gracious, and her friends were so nice. I guess nice people attract nice friends.
Saturday I was up bright and early so that Spencer could run in the Ironkids race. He did great and got a medal. At least SOMEONE in the Amos family got a medal that weekend! :o
I took one last dip in the lake, and then checked my bike and bags in. I was really worried about my bike not being mechanically sound as I had problems with her earlier in the week. Luckily my friend Kevin caught that the back wheel wasn't seated correctly! OY! That could have been a disaster. It was hard to leave my bike. I think it was the most emotional that I got all week.

Race Day:
I was up at 4:00 am to drive to the race site solo. I just couldn't make everyone get up so early knowing they would be there all day. So I downed a mojo bar and pro bar, drank some infinit and topped the tank with a bottle of water. I got to the race site at 5:15 and went about getting things taken care of. It wasn't windy, something I was worried about, so I thought that mother nature might come through for me. Before I knew it the clock said 6:15 and it was time to don the human rubber band. At 6:30 they called us to the swim start. At 6:45 I finally jumped in as Paul Huddle yelled that we were clogging up the dock...
I found a nice place near the bouys towards the back. I made sure I had no one behind me.
Tread, tread, treading water.... and then BOOM off goes the cannon. I hear Mike Reilly say " And the 2007 Ironman Arizona is ON ITS WAY"... and off I went. This time around I had people swimming with me constantly. It felt like I did the first section fast, but my time was the same as last year?? But on the way back I had these two women that drove me nuts! I had one on each side and they were swimming into me and squishing me like the filling in an oreo cookie! I kept having to pull up to try to let them go or get away from them. It never really worked. I just kept thinking that there were a lot of slow swimmers this year!! ;)
Before I knew it I was under the mill ave bridge and I could see the exit steps. YAY!! I swam as hard as I could just to get the thing over! I hit the mat at 1:58 and some change...
T1- the strippers were awesome, they had the suit off in one tug. I heard people yell my name, but it wasn't my family?? I didn't see them at all. I was pretty effecient in T1 and was out of there in around 9 mins (I think)
Bike:
As I was waiting for my gps to boot up at the bike mount line I finally saw my family. Tony said to me "Look, it's not windy!!" all excited. I said "yeah, but it's going to be" and off I went. I heard my name a few times heading out of town which is VERY cool! I had to pull myself back here. My heart rate was still high from the swim and excitement, and I was feeling it. I reminded myself that it was going to be a long day. Ohh if only I knew....:eek:
I was almost to the turnaround on the first loop when I realized that I was going nearly 17 mph uphill with little effort. This is where I realized that my luck was about to change....
I hit the turn around and BAM! A wall of wind. "ohhhh NOOOOO" I thought as I fought to keep 14 mph on the gps. I fretted about what to do as I fought the wind. It was a cross/headwind combo- the worst. Well, until I took a right turn and it was a true HEADwind!! UGH! 10 mph here... I saw my family on this stretch and gave them "the look". They yelled to keep going. But I know they knew I was suffering.
I willed myself to start lap two saying I didn't come here to quit! I didn't swim 2.4 miles in that stinkin lake to quit after one lap. So out I went. I enjoyed the tailwind knowing what I had in store. And yeah, it was getting worse. I was dodging tumbleweeds, and blowing dust. I saw the family again at the out portion of lap two and I yelled to Tony "It's F-in WINDY NOW!!" he laughed and said "yeah, I know"... Yeah- HE could laugh! I wanted to cry!
I then saw them again at the begining of lap three. I had resigned myself at this point to just try to make the bike cutoff and see what I had for a run.
One thing I didn't realize is that I was working so hard on the 19 mile back sections that I wasn't taking in my infinit. I did have to stop and refill my water, but my never reach pod should have been empty by the end. Tony tells me when he picked up my bike it was half full.
Anyway, I made it off the bike at 5:03.
7:55 for the 112 miles. HORRIBLE! It should have been around 7:00 to 7:25 hours. But what could I say. The winds that day were sustained at 25 with gusts well over 30 mph. I actually saw a lady get blown over on her bike! Yeah, THAT is a crosswind!!

T2- I was SOO happy to be rid of my bike! OY VEY!! I got my stuff and found a nice voly to help me in the change tent. I munched on some pringles quick, but I didn't daudle. I was in and out in around 7 minutes. That is like 5 minutes better than last year.
Run:
I had such promise this year as I headed out. I had more time than lastyear, and I just thought I was going to be able to do it. But then about a mile in my stomach decided it didn't like the cola and soup I had just injested at the aid station. I held it until I could find a porta loo and then let it go. It was UGLY. I then spent the next loop trying to find any magic combo from the aid stations, but everything came back up. The first loop took me 2:20. The wind was HORRIBLE, and I even had to ditch my hat because it kept blowing off. I was cold and miserable. At this point I knew that 2:20 wasn't going to do it, so I told myself that I needed to do loop 2 in 2:10 or less if I had any hope. Well I just kept throwing up. I couldn't run, it was ugly. When I got to the end of loop two I ran into a guy that was about to finish. I congratulated him and told him I was pulling the plug. He was very nice, and I could tell he felt bad for me. I saw my family and Tony looked frantic and worried. I told him that I was just too sick and wasn't going to be able to make it. He agreed that if I couldn't start running I wouldn't. By now I was shaking. Tony later told me that my lips were purple.
So I walked down the chute towards the begining of lap three, but instead of going over the mat I walked off the course. I now had to walk past the finishline and all the celebrations with familys and such and find a timing guy. I started to ask the security guard where to go to turn in my chip and he yelled at me. I guess he thought I was trying to get through to see a person in medical. So I yelled at him "NO! I don't know that person! I am dropping out of the race and I need to know where to go to turn in my chip!" and then he looked sad for me and said "Oh sorry ma'am. I'll take it"... And that was that. I walked off with my family towards the car. Was I crying? yes. It was such a hard decision. But what could I do? I would not have made it.

I also felt bad because we had flown our friend Kevin the video pro in to tape the race. So I felt like I wasted his time. And then I realized that you guys were probably wondering what happened so I called my cousin Terrie for her to post for me. Also my friend Lynn was a catcher at the finish. She waited and worried about me until the end. She saw me when I got off the bike, so she knew that I was out there somewhere. Sigh...I felt like I let a lot of people down.
The next day I had to call ASI photo and cancel the finishers plaque that I pre ordered. That will teach me to pre order... :cool:
I also went to the voly dinner so that I could get stuff for my adopt an IM kids. That was also hard. But I'm glad I faced it.
I'll be honest when I say that this DNF is eating on me. And I swear I will never walk off a course again. The "what if I kept going" scenario plays over and over in my head. I know time heals all wounds, but I think this one will still be there until 4-13-08 - The next IMAZ. And DAMN STRAIGHT I WILL Be there!!
Swim 2.4 miles
Bike 112
Run 17.6
No medal.... :(

But one good thing thing.... All of this has finally rubbed off on Tony. He has decided that he wants to do it too! He's now working with my coach and is registered for the race! So here we go! A year of transformation. We both want to lose weight, so we are motivating each other. It's going to be good for both of us. I lost 1.4 lbs this week, he lost 2.8... It's all good afterall.

Well, I know this was LOOOONG winded, but I wanted to capture it all.
So thanks for being an Iron reader! And stay tuned for the sequel! This should be good!
Bear hugs, love bugs, and butterflys to all!
Ciao!
Denise
BTW- the kids in the classes were so cool! I asked the class if by not finishing I was a loser and this little girl says "NO!! YOU DID YOUR BEST! You were SICK!!!" all adamant. She was too cute! It was a good lesson for the kids I suppose. That as hard as you try, and as much as you want it, sometimes things don't go your way. And it's ok.

Aw, Denise you got my waterworks going again! I can so tell how you were feeling, how it's sometimes hard to know what to do, how we try to ignore those subtle and not-so-subtle messages our own bodies will tell us.....but you did the right thing! You listened!! YAY!!

Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to figure out what made you throw up, and not eat that at the next ironman!!!

I competed in a 24 hour mtb relay race once. 4 guys and me. The laps were short - they were doing them in around 30 minutes, mine were closer to 40....so they would do 2 laps each and I would do one.

Throughout the night we all got feeling sick. We were new to 24hour racing and thought this was normal. We also found our brains didn't work very well. We had been leading since my first lap (yes, I was the one who passed for the lead), and we never lost the lead, but the other riders kept looking at the wrong sheet and thought we were in second place. I actually offered to drop out and let them do it - it would tighten up their rest time a little, but they were all faster than me, so we could win that way.....

I didn't want to stop, but I thought, for the good of the team, right?

They refused and eventually, when we finally had daylight again and some of our brains were working again, we realized we had it won, so all worked out well.

On the flipside, we all stayed sick for a week. A doctor we know who also competed there on a different team (and never did live down that I did a faster first lap on my freeride hardtail than he did on his FS XC bike), explained that the water was infested with cryptosperidium. I couldn't wear anything with a waistband for a week! It was urpy, gurgly, bloating, ouchy, but luckily, I managed to refuel as necessary and get the laps in.

A 24 hour relay is nothing in comparison to an ironman, but it's a race experience and a struggle with the question "do I continue or not?"

So, my theory in life is that each injury to a body part makes that body part more susceptible to injury, etc, in the future. Any chance that that experience made my intestines more vulnerable to Crohn's which now has me not racing, barely riding, and barely walking? Maybe. Does that mean I should have dropped out? Probably. Can I change it? Nope.

I did what I could and you did what you could. I hope next year the weather is in your favour and you drink your magic potion and feel success in every pore and doubt in none!

Hugs and proud butterflies,
~T~

Denise, I'm proud of you for giving IMAZ a shot. I'm amazed at anyone that does an Ironman..:)

I'm sure that whatever it was that made you ill will be solved for IMAZ 08..

I look forward to cheering you on at IMWA in 08 or 09 or whenever ya make it down this way :)

ps-LBTC-i'm sure that you can compare a solo 24hr race to an Ironman..

C

Denise, I feel for you. I know it would be terrible to DNF after all that work. It's the culmination of a years training. It's heartbreaking. But you did the right thing.

Before ever race, my husband makes me look him in the eye and say, "There is no shame in a DNF." He knows how stubborn I am and worries that I wold try to push through something nasty like you had and seriously hurt myself. I've finished many races. That's no longer what I think of as making me strong. Now I hope to have the strength to stop if I have to, because it's the right choice.

You made the right choice.

This year's training is going to be so much more fun with your husband training with you.

Take care.

Wow Denise, what a race report. The comment from the little girl about how you were sick... it's amazing how kids can sum it all up so quickly and effectively!

We should all hope we have your courage. As a competitor, it's so hard to walk away, you've invested your entire self in finishing. Congratulations on having that courage to do what's best for yourself.

And... here's to IMAZ 08!!! You BOTH will kick serious butt.

In my book a 24 hour mtb bike race is WAAAAAYYY harder than an IM!!
My husband loves mtn biking with his heart and soul, but I just cannot do it. I've tried, but I'm a skeerdy cat! Give me terra firma TYVM! No technical stuff for this kid. The most I will do is fire trails, or real mellow singletrack.
But yeah, you are a STUD for doing that! And I really hope that what happened didn't contribute to that nasty crohns!
I feel for you with that. It sounds like a HORRIBLE thing! My co worker has lupus, and she goes through a lot with that. I imagine that though the disease is different, the forced change of lifestyle is much the same.
As you send them to me, I send them back to you.....
~~~~~~ flutterybys~~~~~~~
Denise

Oh- and to everyone else. I know what made me sick. The lack of proper hydration/nutrition on the bike. My tummy shut down. And the more I tried to take stuff in the worse it got.My gut became bloated. I think I should have passed by a couple of aid stations and let what was in my stomach absorb before I tried to take more in. Souds counter intuitive, but I think that was the course I should have taken.

Denise,

I appreciate your honest and detailed report of the race.

I have never done your degree of racing or endeavors but I agree with your assessment as to what happened. I've noticed when I've done distance cycling, if I don't drink/eat when I am programmed to do it (ie if I say I'm going to drink water every 10 min and Cytomax every 20 and eat every 30) because I feel too good or I'm distracted, it can kick my backside. The only time I've really lost it was because I was doing an awesome average and thought by drinking, I'd slow down. I felt great until it happened too....and then it was miserable. Another time I did 100 miles with no stopping because I was going fast and didn't feel like it. The next day was bad, I was shaking and worthless.

That's awesome that you will have a partner in training! And I am positive that next year will be awesome. I'm proud of your determination :D

denise,
i just read your IMAZ tale, and i must say i was impressed!
i was riding home from church that day around noon or so, that would be going northwest from chandler to scottsdale. i ran into the IMAZ group cycling down mcclintock, and i must say the wind was as bad as i think ive ever been in. so i go home and take a nap, then i head out for our sunday nite group (by auto and again to chandler) and get stuck in traffic on rio salado, watching all these gorgeous bikes go by, as i get redirected all over creation but the bikes were just awesome so i was happy just to idle in my convertible and watch them go by. DH and i are going "oh wow that kestrel is gorgeous,"and "honey check out that cervelo."
so we leave group at about 8:30 that night and we're driving home down priest i think and we still see people running under the lights to finish the race. you people are so amazing!!
anyway, i always thought this might be something i want to do. but the run scares me.
were you scared to try? how did you get started? i thought about getting one of those books about how to train, would that be helpful?
what do you think?