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View Full Version : Natural gift skill you wish you had, that you have already



shootingstar
02-09-2013, 07:25 PM
I've always envied people who are musically inclined. To me reading music, thinking musically, is like a foreign language to me. An exceptionally gifted musician, singer leaves a wonderful footprint behind long after they are gone.

On the other side, I feel immensely blessed to naturally want to write and do art. It's been a part of me ever since I was a young teen. Not fully developed but that's ok. I do what I can, when I want to.

(And no I wouldn't be putting cycling in this same bag. Not for myself. I enjoy cycling but it doesn't express the true essence of "me". Not really.)

IBrakeforPastry
02-10-2013, 04:48 AM
Smooth and articulate speaking. I can get stuck in the middle of a sentence, looking for the right word, the way to explain or describe something. I read a lot, I'm pretty intelligent, but my spoken vocabulary doesn't reflect that. It's frustrating.

missjean
02-10-2013, 07:18 AM
Oh, I would love to be able to sing, but I can't carry a tune in a bucket.
But, I can make or fix pretty much anything I set my mind to.

IBrakeforPastry - that is something that happens to me too. The word I need just disappears from my brain. It will have been there, just waiting it's turn, then when I need it, it's gone - then I'm left saying things like, you know, that round thing you make soup in.

goldfinch
02-10-2013, 07:54 AM
I wish I had more athletic ability. When I was a child I was the clumsiest child. I could never catch a ball. I maybe hit a softball twice in my life. Bowling results in gutter balls. I can't make a basket if throwing a basket ball. I was always the last to finish a running race. Second to last last (after an extremely fat girl) picked for sports teams in school. My entire family was this way. One of my sibs is autistic and another has Asperger's Syndrome. Lack of coordination are markers for these conditions. I was tested many years ago and the test found that I had problems with fine and gross motor functioning.

I gave up trying the physical stuff as all I got was failure.

Then in my late 50s I picked up biking. I suck but I love to ride and despite my clumsiness I don't seem to have a balance problem. I do have to be careful about attention though and can easily make mistakes like pulling out in front of traffic that I just don't seem to notice.

This has been on my mind because I am going to post a thread about how to improve my biking skills.

I really have little to complain about though because I had plenty of other skills that served me well through the years. :)

Crankin
02-10-2013, 08:46 AM
Well, I would like some mechanical ability and like Goldfinch, some fine motor skills and better spatial relations. These are all connected, and they pretty much stopped me from doing a lot of things. I also cannot catch or hit a ball, and bowling, forget it. I don't care about that now, though, rather how these lack of skills have affected my riding. I've come a long way, but really I don't think there will be much more improvement.
I can read and write well, speak pretty well, and I'm super organized. I have absolutely no musical or artistic talent, though, and it still amazes me one of my kids is a fairly accomplished musician.

Swan
02-10-2013, 11:07 AM
I wish I could catch and aim! Whether I'm tossing a breakfast bar at my mum, practicing archery, or playing a video game, I can't seem to aim at all! I've been trying to work on that, though, and can hit a bulls' eye 2-4/10 times now... It may have something to do with my horrid depth perception, but maybe one day I'll get a real hang on it.

Other than that and running (bad knees and ankles, oh gosh), I'm going to allow myself to feel proud that I'm fairly well ridiculously skilled in just about everything else I've ever tried!

shootingstar
02-10-2013, 12:16 PM
I don't have mechanical skills and I really know this, when I watch dearie solve malfunction, non-operational piece of equipment or gizmo and the natural problem-solving process he goes through when there's no manual around.

I also know my geo-spatial skill is crappy. Heck if I get off at a subway stop that I haven't used before, it takes me awhile to figure out my location to new intersections, etc. Whereas he seems to naturally follow along all sorts of routes after some map-reading...and this is before days of GPS portable aids (and I'm not talking about just a compass. :)).

However I know that I have refined technical skill since I've had to implement for several employers, computerization across multiple dept. functions and train others in a detailed way, deal with software problems, design software reports, etc. This skill most definitely was acquired in my late 20's onward and I had no idea I had this skill in me. Related to technical and abit of art skills is sewing.. excellent tailoring is technical but creating a piece of clothing with the right colour, texture and cut on a person, is also abit of artistic....you have to be able to envision when looking at a bolt of fabric. I used to get so inspired going to fabric stores. It is like going into an art supply store with all the different paints, etc.

I know that my artistic side in sewing is helpful because my mother is superior in tailoring and good at basic pattern drafting (she is self taught. I'm hopeless at pattern drafting), but she really chooses such boring colours and textures for others. Therefore she is more technically bent...and actually this shows up when she does mathematical calculations in her head while my father patiently watches her and waits for her to spit out the answer. :) My father is naturally more artistic --likes Chinese opera, Chinese calligraphy, etc.

zoom-zoom
02-10-2013, 12:50 PM
I wish I had more athletic ability. When I was a child I was the clumsiest child. I could never catch a ball. I maybe hit a softball twice in my life. Bowling results in gutter balls. I can't make a basket if throwing a basket ball. I was always the last to finish a running race. Second to last last (after an extremely fat girl) picked for sports teams in school. My entire family was this way. One of my sibs is autistic and another has Asperger's Syndrome. Lack of coordination are markers for these conditions. I was tested many years ago and the test found that I had problems with fine and gross motor functioning.

I gave up trying the physical stuff as all I got was failure.

Then in my late 50s I picked up biking. I suck but I love to ride and despite my clumsiness I don't seem to have a balance problem. I do have to be careful about attention though and can easily make mistakes like pulling out in front of traffic that I just don't seem to notice.

It's interesting that you bring this up...I am not particularly graceful or coordinated and have no less than 3 confirmed blood relatives on the spectrum (my son, my nephew, and my brother). My son does quite well on the bike, in spite of his Asperger's. I think it helps that he also has ADHD and when he's on minimal meds he has far less fear/caution. It's hesitation that gets people in trouble when they ride off-road (I have a broken wrist to show for it).

My desired skill...the ability to read music. I have a VERY good ear for picking up melodies and harmonies and recalling them for years afterwards and a decent voice, but the inability to sight-read was a deal-breaker when I auditioned for a college concert choir.

emily_in_nc
02-10-2013, 12:52 PM
I would most love to be able to sing and dance beautifully, I think.

My skills are more in the writing and technical realms. I am also very organized. These skills served me well in my career as a software engineer, but I would love to have more performance-related skills.

Better social skills would be nice as well!

Koronin
02-10-2013, 02:32 PM
I'm totally tone def, can't draw worth anything, and as much as I love sports, I'm not very good at it. Unless you count archery as a sport as I am good with a bow and arrows. Otherwise I'm much better with macanical and electronic things and can fairly easily read diagrams and blueprints for cars or houses.

malkin
02-10-2013, 03:19 PM
Oh, I'd love to sing like Judy Collins and dance like...well, like a person who knew the difference between left and right at least. Drawing would be fun too.
I might wish to play the piano, but then all the fun I'm having learning right now would go away, wouldn't it?

It was a fine stroke of luck that I landed in a profession and a position that uses many of my strengths: communication, language, play and recognizing progress in very tiny increments. I still get to sing and dance and make art and music but I don't have to demonstrate any particular competence at those things.


edit: Brewer says that while I'm at it I might as well wish to sing like Julie Andrews and dance like Cyd Charisse.

hirakukibou
02-10-2013, 04:13 PM
I am pretty artistic, except I can't draw myself out of a box. I am a pretty good writer and have a good singing voice. I do wish I could read music better, but that would take more work than I am willing to put in right now.

Owlie
02-10-2013, 05:42 PM
I wish I had some musical, artistic and writing ability. I can write for my field, but I used to be much more adept at expressing myself with words. Now that I think about it, it happened in college when I didn't have to write for anyone outside my field and didn't have time to read for pleasure.

My sister got all of those. She also got the athletic ability.

tulip
02-11-2013, 08:02 AM
I am very good at languages, and can speak my own and one other fluently, and get by pretty well with others given just a bit of study. Music also comes relatively easily but I don't do it very often any more.

I'm shy and not very outgoing and wish I was more comfortable in social situations. Funny, when I'm speaking a language other than my own, I'm much more comfortable being social.

GLC1968
02-11-2013, 09:25 AM
I would like to have an aptitude for languages. I do alright in my native tongue, but I have always really, really struggled with learning new ones and I wish I was better at it. I suppose if I were to immerse myself, I might do OK eventually but I've not had the opportunity in my life to date.

I can't spell either but with the advent of computers and spell check, it's not such a bid deal anymore so I don't mind the deficiency.

But really, what I've always wanted was the ability to sing. I can read music, I can play instruments, I can hear music with a critical ear...I just can't carry a tune to save my life. I've always wanted to. Singing competitions enthrall me because it's something I just cannot do at all.

tulip
02-11-2013, 10:09 AM
I would like to have an aptitude for languages. I do alright in my native tongue, but I have always really, really struggled with learning new ones and I wish I was better at it. I suppose if I were to immerse myself, I might do OK eventually but I've not had the opportunity in my life to date.

Immersion was key for me to become fluent in my second language. But the others come much more easily now. It was a priority for me, so I made it happen years ago and the benefits have been long-lasting and extend beyond the original second language.

Crankin
02-11-2013, 10:17 AM
I wish I was fluent in another language, too. I have the aptitude, but unless I'm immersed at this point, it's not going to happen. I can get by in Spanish, for traveling purposes, but verbs make all the learning go out the window when I'm trying to speak under stress. And now, because Spanish is the one language I am just a little familiar with, when I try to learn a little of another, I keep thinking in Spanish. I marvel at those who speak multiple languages. I have one son who is fluent in Italian (he lived there for half a year) and my younger son came back from his first deployment in Spain a few years ago, speaking rapid and fluent Spanish. He now can handle a bit of Farsi and Pashtun and is taking Chinese in college.
Sometimes, I feel utterly talentless.

shootingstar
02-11-2013, 11:22 AM
I know I don't have a natural affinity to learn another language. I knew only Chinese until kindergarten. Learning English was an immense shock. But yes, I mastered it within 1 yr. even though I had to go for ESL help for another yr.

Chinese has degraded immensely --I could never offer interpretation in any job. This is a serious matter in the business world particularily anything involving legal, finance and health matters on the job. Myself and siblings have all learned the hard way in our jobs. That is the truest test of linguistic fluency and accuracy --to speak the language accurately in response to unscripted, unpredictable situations with other people, particularily with members of the public...as your client.

But yes, I must still speak it within my family.

French was a struggle to learn. I think I only know certain words, phrases, because I had to study language.....3 different times over 2.5 decades! All mandatory --public-high school, university.

GLC1968
02-11-2013, 11:39 AM
French was a struggle to learn. I think I only know certain words, phrases, because I had to study language.....3 different times over 2.5 decades! All mandatory --public-high school, university.

Yeah, me too. 5 years of Spanish, 1 year of Japanese and I can't speak either of them at all. What scares me is that I got A's in all of the classes too...and yet I managed to not retain any of it! :rolleyes:

skhill
02-11-2013, 01:49 PM
I wish I spoke a second language too. I read Latin and Classical and Koine Greek pretty well, but I never got around to learning a modern language. But really, I wish I had more mechanical ability/ handyman skills. Sometimes it's a struggle to even hammer in a nail straight.

I'm very thankful for my musical skills. I play several instruments tolerably well-- not professional caliber but well enough to play in local amatuer groups. I can sightread and sightsing (which is much more difficult) quite well, and y'all have reminded me that's not an ability that should be taken for granted.

Veronica
02-11-2013, 02:15 PM
I wish I spoke a second language too. I read Latin and Classical and Koine Greek pretty well, but I never got around to learning a modern language. .

I majored in Classics with an emphasis in Latin. It's not the most useful degree to have. :rolleyes: It's made me popular at work though, as many teachers come to me for grammar and root word needs.

I'm pretty happy with who I am, but I would like to have more skills to take on zombies. :D

Veronica

tulip
02-11-2013, 02:49 PM
For those of you who want to learn a second (or more) language, immersion is really the only way to do it, not only for the language itself but for all of the cultural references, the food, the manners, the art, the architecture, etc. You cannot learn it from a book, and while Rosetta Stone will get you to a certain point very effectively, it won't get you all the way. I find nothing more exciting than learning about another culture by being thrown right in once I get the basics of the language down. I can feel my brain growing when I've done that, and it's pretty invigorating. It's never too late, in my opinion.

---
I think the hardest thing for me is being confident in a new skill that I am learning, and not talking myself out of it at the beginning by telling myself that I suck at it--it's a habit that I learned early on and it's a hard one to break. Any new skill takes ALOT of consistent practice and work, and I often have just thrown in the towel when it gets hard. That's my biggest challenge these days, is to overcome that initial "I suck at this" attitude.

GLC1968
02-11-2013, 04:36 PM
I think the hardest thing for me is being confident in a new skill that I am learning, and not talking myself out of it at the beginning by telling myself that I suck at it--it's a habit that I learned early on and it's a hard one to break. Any new skill takes ALOT of consistent practice and work, and I often have just thrown in the towel when it gets hard. That's my biggest challenge these days, is to overcome that initial "I suck at this" attitude.

Ha. This is exactly why I've never done any foreign country immersion! I have convinced myself that I'd get there, not be able to communicate and hate it. And for a closet introvert (how's that for a description?), it's a terrifying thing to even imagine. It's easier to just say that I suck at languages.

FWIW, I think I'd be pretty good at taking on the zombies. ;) That's kind of a hard skill to market though.

Veronica
02-11-2013, 04:56 PM
FWIW, I think I'd be pretty good at taking on the zombies. ;) That's kind of a hard skill to market though.

We went skeet shooting last year. I had never even held a gun before. I pretty much sucked at it. I think my weapon of choice would probably be a baseball bat. And I wish I had martial arts training or that I could zigzag like a football player.

I really like your "closet introvert" description.

Veronica

emily_in_nc
02-11-2013, 05:13 PM
I took three years of French in high school, one year of Latin, then repeated French 1 in college (needed a "crip course" one semester).

Living in Belize, even though it's an English-speaking country on paper, there is a ton of Spanish spoken. My DH took German, so some good we both are!

We did a bunch of "Spanish 1" using the Pimsleur audio courses, similar to Rosetta Stone. We learned enough to get by on a 16-day trip to Mexico this December. We could check into a hotel, deal with money, buy bus tickets, order food in a restaurant, and have very, very basic conversations with vendors, etc. But certainly, once they started talking among themselves, we could only get a word here or there. I think if we lived in Mexico for a year, we'd become a bit more competent. But it's certainly more difficult learning a language in your 50s! That said, my grandparents and parents were excellent in languages, so I do pick them up fairly easily. And GLC, I remember more of that high school French than I ever could have predicted. Once I started studying Spanish, a lot of the French started coming back...I could remember the French words more easily than the new, foreign-feeling Spanish ones. Interesting how the brain works...a lot of stuff is tucked back in there that we don't even realize is still there, until it has a catalyst to bring it back to the forefront!

malkin
02-11-2013, 05:37 PM
TE vs. Zombies!
I can hardly wait!

re: language learning
+1 for immersion; really you need lots and lots of comprehensible input.

re: "I suck at this"
I just wrote a paper reframing this attitude into what I call "Imperfect Mastery."

Veronica
02-11-2013, 05:45 PM
TE vs. Zombies!
I can hardly wait!


re: "I suck at this"
I just wrote a paper reframing this attitude into what I call "Imperfect Mastery."

No, really I sucked at skeet. I couldn't even hit one on the ground. :D

Veronica

Koronin
02-11-2013, 08:00 PM
I took 2 years of Spanish in high school and 1 year of French in college and can't speak either one. My husband spent time in Spain (Air Force, he was there for about a year during Desert Shield/Storm) and learned Spanish. At this point he can't speak it, but can understand fairly well. He also has tried to learn some German, and actually it's the same thing he can understand it ok but cannot speak it.

Veronica, sorry about your issues with skeet shooting. I've never tried it before. I have shot both a hand gun and shot gun at ranges, but not skeet. My preferred weapon is a bow and arrows. I'm a lot more comfortable and confident with those.

salsabike
02-11-2013, 08:50 PM
I like this question, shootingstar.

My brain loves, loves, loves foreign languages. I've had 13 years of French, starting in 1st grade, three of Spanish, two of Japanese. The French comes back quickly and fairly fluently when I'm in a French-speaking place. The Spanish and Japanese worked for politesse, but not much conversation. But my head just loves the stuff, and if I could do anything I wanted, I would just go back to school and learn languages until my head was stuffed full.

And I wish I could draw. I'm horrible at it. I still draw exactly the way I did when I was a little kid, and my drawing stank then. It stinketh still. :)

skhill
02-12-2013, 06:59 AM
The talk of learning languages has reminded me of my Grandma. She once said she was too stupid to learn a second language. The thing is, she was a native speaker of two and didn't realize it: English and ASL. Her mother was deaf, and really ASL was Grandma's first language. We don't always see the abilities we do have...

GLC1968
02-13-2013, 07:13 AM
No, really I sucked at skeet. I couldn't even hit one on the ground. :D

Veronica


I just spit coffee! :D

I'm a good shot with most weapons...or at least I was before I got glasses. Now that my vision is corrected (it's been 'off' my whole life and I was compensating), I'm not sure how good I'll be. I hope to test it on archery in the near future. ;)

I don't think zombies can swim, so if you stay near water, you'll have that going for you!

Veronica
02-13-2013, 07:33 AM
I do wonder if I might be better at archery. I love Daryl and his bow on the Walking Dead. We haven't seen the latest episode yet. We like to get 2 or 3 episodes and do a marathon. I'm the same way about Justified and Breaking Bad. Tivo is my friend.

I think I just need practice, but it's another time consuming hobby.

Veronica

GLC1968
02-13-2013, 08:16 AM
If you love Daryl, you won't love the latest episode! I would definitely put watching it off until you have the next two or three episodes saved up to watch so that you don't have to wait a bunch of time to find out what will happen.

Veronica
02-13-2013, 08:29 AM
Yeah, the cliffhanger was not auspicious for Daryl. They are not shy about killing characters off.

Veronica

GLC1968
02-13-2013, 11:10 AM
Oh, well not to give too much away, but he's not dead. ,Personally, I think he is WAY too popular with fans to kill him off.