shootingstar
11-30-2012, 09:50 PM
I was warned by dearie about my recently hired supervisor:
In the midst of the meeting with her and another colleague on a work project of ours, she suddenly cried before us and said that I knew so much. She also said: "I'm not sure why I'm crying". The guy (my work colleague) and I were abit stunned. I said, "I'm concerned". And he added a few seconds later: "So am I". But we carried on the meeting..and slowed down the tempo/pace of the meeting. It gave her time to collect herself, continue talking without either of us creating dead silence and becoming too personal.
After I left the meeting rm. with him, I asked him if I said anything inappropriate. He said absolutely not. He couldn't figure out either.
15 min. later, I had to jump to another meeting in elsewhere with another person.
Half an hr. after this meeting, I walked by her desk (open office concept where people could hear us..) and asked: "Is there anything I can help?" Of course, she said no. But she said she had a need to always know, understand.
Anyway, because of the open office concept I wasn't going to put her on the spot to probe personally. Instead I explained, I was accustomed to not knowing much (this is the existence of being a former librarian) ...but had less of need to know everything in advance. That admittedly I enjoyed that part of any job I had: not knowing everything and treated meeting clients like a journey, not often knowing much about their world but try to ask the right questions, blah, blah.. Anyway, we managed to slide the conversation safely about our clients who themselves undergoing work change, etc. I ended the chat by repeating: Is there anything I can do better? She said, "No, it's my own neurotic..etc."
I should have at least asked her during the crying outburst, if she wanted time out. But the surprise was so great, and her being a supervisor (and an experienced one elsewhere previously for over 15 years in a totally different operation) that it was awkward to know what to do but allow her some respect/dignity.
Dearie wonders if she had other problems which has little to do with work insecurities. Maybe, but anyway... I cannot make her personal problems, my problems.
Background: She is around 60 and did hold a former position with more public importance, more people reported to her, an operation in public media. So she is "experienced" in life to have street smarts, etc. She left because of unpleasant superior and tougher, more inflexible work culture.
How have you coped in your job/career, where you had to step outside your comfort zone alot?
In the midst of the meeting with her and another colleague on a work project of ours, she suddenly cried before us and said that I knew so much. She also said: "I'm not sure why I'm crying". The guy (my work colleague) and I were abit stunned. I said, "I'm concerned". And he added a few seconds later: "So am I". But we carried on the meeting..and slowed down the tempo/pace of the meeting. It gave her time to collect herself, continue talking without either of us creating dead silence and becoming too personal.
After I left the meeting rm. with him, I asked him if I said anything inappropriate. He said absolutely not. He couldn't figure out either.
15 min. later, I had to jump to another meeting in elsewhere with another person.
Half an hr. after this meeting, I walked by her desk (open office concept where people could hear us..) and asked: "Is there anything I can help?" Of course, she said no. But she said she had a need to always know, understand.
Anyway, because of the open office concept I wasn't going to put her on the spot to probe personally. Instead I explained, I was accustomed to not knowing much (this is the existence of being a former librarian) ...but had less of need to know everything in advance. That admittedly I enjoyed that part of any job I had: not knowing everything and treated meeting clients like a journey, not often knowing much about their world but try to ask the right questions, blah, blah.. Anyway, we managed to slide the conversation safely about our clients who themselves undergoing work change, etc. I ended the chat by repeating: Is there anything I can do better? She said, "No, it's my own neurotic..etc."
I should have at least asked her during the crying outburst, if she wanted time out. But the surprise was so great, and her being a supervisor (and an experienced one elsewhere previously for over 15 years in a totally different operation) that it was awkward to know what to do but allow her some respect/dignity.
Dearie wonders if she had other problems which has little to do with work insecurities. Maybe, but anyway... I cannot make her personal problems, my problems.
Background: She is around 60 and did hold a former position with more public importance, more people reported to her, an operation in public media. So she is "experienced" in life to have street smarts, etc. She left because of unpleasant superior and tougher, more inflexible work culture.
How have you coped in your job/career, where you had to step outside your comfort zone alot?