How the other half lives . . .

[limewave]

We live in a small cape-cod home built in the 1960's. There's one bathroom for all of us. One living room. 2 bedrooms.

Over the last year I've had friends building a house about 2 miles from us. The house is nearly completed and they have moved in. We went for a quick visit earlier this week and this afternoon I'm taking the kids there for a swim.

My kids were BLOWN away by the home. DD thinks it's actually Cinderella's castle as every single room (including the bathrooms) have crystal chandeliers. There are 4 suites: The master suite which includes bedroom, bathroom, dressing room, walk-in closet for him and her. A Paris-themed and Lakeshore-themed suite that both include a master bedroom with walk-in closet, bathroom, and 2 children rooms with their own bathrooms. The last one is more of an apartment that has 2 bedrooms (each with their own bathroom) living area and a separate kitchen.

The pool has lighted fountains and a waterfall. There is a shooting range in the backyard. Outdoor kitchen. Of course all of this sits on the lake front. I haven't had the full tour yet, but I'm sure I'll get one this afternoon!

After our first visit, I spent the rest of the night scrubbing our floors and vacuuming the drapes. I love our little home, but wowzers!

Seriously, what do you get them for a housewarming gift? I really want to welcome them to the neighborhood, but everything I can think of to give them seems podunky.

[beccaB]

I live in a tiny house too..5 people, a few of them teenagers! One bathroom. A not so well liked thinker once said, "That which doesn't kill you makes you stronger"
As for a housewarming gift, how about a fine wine and gourmet food basket? People can always use consumables.

[indysteel]

Yeah; I have the same reaction when I visit my best friend at her 7,000 square foot home that she shares with her husband (no kids or pets). They have a pool and tennis court. They bought it about the same time that DH and I bought our much more modest (but still really nice to us) home. She lives in an affluent suburb while the town I live, well, not affluent. It's a bit of culture shock.

As for a housewarming gift, I'd go with a bottle of wine and something homemade, like cookies,....or nothing. Honestly, I only got a handful of housewarming gifts when I bought my first house. With my second (the one I got with DH just before we married), I got nothing. I'm not entirely sure they're the norm anymore.

[tulip]

Bake them homemade bread. I like the sound of your house better.

[jessmarimba]

Can you give them a gift card to a neighborhood cafe or something? To me that seems less like giving them money and/or something they don't need and more suggesting the more charming aspects of where they'll live in a way that pretty much forces them to experience it.

(And trust me, I'd probably find your 1960s cape cod more appealing than their place...new houses just don't have any personality!)

[Biciclista]

I'd give them some of those super cleaning pads to keep those chandeliers clean (I wouldn't give them a housewarming gift, really). I like your house better too. My house is a lot like yours except we have the good fortune of two bathrooms. smaller houses cost less to heat for one thing!

[limewave]

(And trust me, I'd probably find your 1960s cape cod more appealing than their place...new houses just don't have any personality!)

Normally I don't care for new houses either but they actually did a lot of architectural detail in this home, it is stunning.

So I'm thinking about getting them a gift basket from the "Cheese Lady." It's a small local business and she has the BEST cheese. My favorite thing is to get fresh goat cheese, roasted tomatoes in olive oil, and flat bread (all at her store) to make home made pizzas. It's super yummy and decadent (and within my budget).

[indysteel]

smaller houses cost less to heat for one thing!

Seriously. My friend mentioned once how worried she is about plumbing issues because they have SIX bathrooms/halfbaths. Why they bought a house that large for just the two of them is beyond me. When she first told me they were buying it, I have to admit that I reacted somewhat negatively. She interpreted it as envy, but my feelings were and remain far more complicated than that.

[ny biker]

Well, I had a friend in college whose family had a huge, expensive house on a giant parcel of land. He once described his father as a ball of hate.

Happy homes come in all shapes and sizes.

[Catrin]

... When she first told me they were buying it, I have to admit that I reacted somewhat negatively. She interpreted it as envy, but my feelings were and remain far more complicated than that.

Why would 2 people need all of that? I can understand wanting something nice, but really, 6 bathrooms for one married couple? Do they perhaps envision having one of their parents eventually moving in or something? It sounds like a great... multi-generational home (for lack of a better term). Perhaps this is just my own background showing, I just think all of that would be so hard/expensive to maintain properly.

I've only seen your house once, but I liked it :D

[Owlie]

Why would 2 people need all of that? I can understand wanting something nice, but really, 6 bathrooms for one married couple? Do they perhaps envision having one of their parents eventually moving in or something? It sounds like a great... multi-generational home (for lack of a better term). Perhaps this is just my own background showing, I just think all of that would be so hard/expensive to maintain properly.

I've only seen your house once, but I liked it :D

No, I agree entirely. But maybe my laziness is showing. ;)

[Biciclista]

7 bathrooms would be better. You could use one a day! put signs on them "Sunday" "Monday" etc so you didn't get mixed up.

[Owlie]

7 bathrooms would be better. You could use one a day! put signs on them "Sunday" "Monday" etc so you didn't get mixed up.

And then you don't have to clean them as often!

[zoom-zoom]

No, I agree entirely. But maybe my laziness is showing. ;)

Ha, I totally agree! I HATE housework!

Honestly, I think massive houses are kind of gross and reek of conspicuous consumption, which is so 1990s. Even if we had the good fortune to be able to afford a mansion there's no way we'd do it. I couldn't live in something over 2k square feet and not feel guilty. There are so many in need (people and critters) that I'd rather help. Dumping money into a big home, then dumping more into the cost of maintaining said home...no way.

[ny biker]

And then you don't have to clean them as often!

Once I lived in a rented condo with 1.5 bathrooms. I never used the powder room, so all I had to do was dust before guests came over. Also I kept my bike in it.

[sarahkonamojo]

Invite your friend on a bike ride. She can get to know the neighborhood.

[shootingstar]

Housewarming gift: If they like it, a huge year round wreath to hang on a door. Neat if your kids could help you make it...but nah, alot of work right?

Homemade food is always nice. Or a big basket of tropical fruit --something different with interesting snacks.

A home with too many bathrooms, means too much work for me. That includes a big front lawn and long walkway.

[7rider]

Seriously, what do you get them for a housewarming gift?.

A gift credit to the local power company so they can keep the fountain lights on and water bubbling??? ;):p

I find we tend to expand to fill the space we're in. We have a 3 BR, 2.5 Ba house. 5 years ago, the spare bedrooms were empty. Today? Um, less so! :o

But our house - which is by no means large - is as big a house as I would ever want (but I do want a deck and another garage). I hate to clean the house we have now. Can't imagine cleaning anything bigger.

[indysteel]

A gift credit to the local power company so they can keep the fountain lights on and water bubbling??? ;):p

I find we tend to expand to fill the space we're in. We have a 3 BR, 2.5 Ba house. 5 years ago, the spare bedrooms were empty. Today? Um, less so! :o

But our house - which is by no means large - is as big a house as I would ever want (but I do want a deck and another garage). I hate to clean the house we have now. Can't imagine cleaning anything bigger.

I'll trade you a deck for a second bathroom. A groundhog has made a home under our deck. We have to remove part of the deck to get to him and backfill the chambers. Ugh. The city park is our neighbor, so we get lots of critters.

Actually, we have a second bathroom on our second floor, but it only has a tub. I'm not a fan of baths. And both bathrooms are the size of a coat closet. Thankfully, DH and I have worked out a morning routine that avoids conflict. It also gives us time to spend with the cats in the morning. They're not allowed upstairs, so I'd just as soon get ready downstairs anyway. The biggest drawback is our guests end up using the same bathroom that gets all the heavy use (and all my dark hair). I'd rather have a guest bathroom or half-bath that isn't used much so that I don't rush to clean it every time somebody stops by.

At the risk of making anybody feel bad for wanting or having a larger home, I just don't get the need for more, more, more. My coworker and her husband bought a house 3 years ago that was bigger than their previous home. They lived in that house all of 2 years before they decided they had to have an even bigger house. When I asked why, she said she wanted a bigger....wait for it....laundry room.

Really? You're going through the hassle and expense of buying a 4,000 square foot home for just the two of you because you want a bigger room to clean your clothes? That's nuts. I hate moving and buying/selling homes so much that there has to be a pretty good reason before I'll put myself through that kind of stress.

[Irulan]

Happy homes come in all shapes and sizes.

Thank you.

wow as someone who is househunting for an upgrade, all the negativity is a little.... um, whatever. Everyone has their reasons for bigger/smaller, fancier/simpler and just because it's not for you doesn't mean it's a bad thing. I can totally see being stumped about a housewarming present but why such a quick leap to judgement on people's housing?

I mean, so what if she wants a bigger laundry room. It's her house.

Not everyone who is affluent is full of hate or a social climber. Some people work darn hard for what they have and if they choose to put it into a big house instead of something else, so what? I swear, the manner in which some things go, in lightspeed fashion, to negative judgement is downright unfriendly.

We are in the process of looking for a new house that will meet our needs better, and yes, it is probably going to be a little bigger and a lot nicer. I guess I won't be talking about it here.

[indysteel]

Thank you.

wow as someone who is househunting for an upgrade, all the negativity is a little.... um, whatever. Everyone has their reasons for bigger/smaller, fancier/simpler and just because it's not for you doesn't mean it's a bad thing. I can totally see being stumped about a housewarming present but why such a quick leap to judgement on people's housing?

I mean, so what if she wants a bigger laundry room. It's her house.

Not everyone who is affluent is full of hate or a social climber. Some people work darn hard for what they have and if they choose to put it into a big house instead of something else, so what? I swear, the manner in which some things go, in lightspeed fashion, to negative judgement is downright unfriendly.

We are in the process of looking for a new house that will meet our needs better, and yes, it is probably going to be a little bigger and a lot nicer. I guess I won't be talking about it here.

I don't have a problem with everyone who purchases a bigger/nicer home, but I do bristle at the people in my life who are on a fairly constant quest--and I am generally capable of perceiving the difference--for more stuff or for stuff that goes far beyond meeting their needs or is outside their means. They're never satisfied, and I find it sad for a number of reasons. With both instances I referred to in my posts, there is much to the story than just their housebuying that leads me to my conclusions about them.

But that said, you're right in that I painted with much broader strokes than I intended, and I'm sorry to have come of as that judgmental. My current home is bigger than my first (which isn't difficult since it was 900 sq. feet); so it's not that I totally reject the idea of upgrading.

[Biciclista]

not sure what leaning to the left has to do with anything here. We're talking about a couple who are buying a house with 6 bathrooms. What the heck is the point of that?
And how long ago did "leaning to the RIGHT" stop meaning CONSERVATIVE as in NOT ostentatious or conspicuous consuming?
More than half the people on our planet are lucky to have clean water to DRINK, and some of us have houses with 6 toilets which flush GALLONS of drinking water away - such a waste!
So if we want to entertain ourselves on this thread by pointing out how truly ridiculous that is, I guess we're going to do it. If this is bothering you, maybe you should examine your feelings. We certainly weren't picking on you.
I see nothing wrong with upgrading, getting a bigger and/or nicer house, but there are limits to what most of us think are reasonable.

[Tri Girl]

Well I can say that I'm glad I live in "my half." I don't need a big house. I opt to spend my money on bikes instead. ;)


And it seems people who have houses that big most likely don't tend to clean them themselves. I gotta think if you have a house that big, you have a housekeeper helping keep it clean.

[hulagirl]

not sure what leaning to the left has to do with anything here. We're talking about a couple who are buying a house with 6 bathrooms. What the heck is the point of that?
And how long ago did "leaning to the right" stop meaning conservative as in not ostentatious or conspicuous consuming?
More than half the people on our planet are lucky to have clean water to drink, and some of us have houses with 6 toilets which flush gallons of drinking water away - such a waste!
So if we want to entertain ourselves on this thread by pointing out how truly ridiculous that is, i guess we're going to do it. If this is bothering you, maybe you should examine your feelings. We certainly weren't picking on you.
I see nothing wrong with upgrading, getting a bigger and/or nicer house, but there are limits to what most of us think are reasonable.

+1!

[goldfinch]

not sure what leaning to the left has to do with anything here. We're talking about a couple who are buying a house with 6 bathrooms. What the heck is the point of that?
And how long ago did "leaning to the RIGHT" stop meaning CONSERVATIVE as in NOT ostentatious or conspicuous consuming?
More than half the people on our planet are lucky to have clean water to DRINK, and some of us have houses with 6 toilets which flush GALLONS of drinking water away - such a waste!
So if we want to entertain ourselves on this thread by pointing out how truly ridiculous that is, I guess we're going to do it. If this is bothering you, maybe you should examine your feelings. We certainly weren't picking on you.
I see nothing wrong with upgrading, getting a bigger and/or nicer house, but there are limits to what most of us think are reasonable.

+2

I couldn't have said it better.

[ACG]

For the housewarming gift, suggestion by most others; home made bread, baked goods in a pretty basket, a small plant, or see packets with a little pot ready to be planted.

It is the thought that counts.

[Tri Girl]

For the housewarming gift, suggestion by most others; home made bread, baked goods in a pretty basket, a small plant, or see packets with a little pot ready to be planted.

It is the thought that counts.

I agree. Something homemade would mean the most.

[Irulan]

if only two people are in a house, it's still the same amount of showers, flushing and tooth brushing regardless of how many bathrooms there are. Let's assume that the toilets don't run. You can have one running toilet that uses way more water than 5 low-toilets that never get used. You can have a 3000 ft sq house that is more energy efficient than an poorly built 1000 ft sq place with an old refrigerator and leaky windows. Appearances aren't everything.

So how do you balance what you want and what's appropriate? And who gets to decide what's appropriate?

[zoom-zoom]

Can we all agree that Donald Trump is not appropriate (and I'm not just talking about his real estate, heh)? :p

[Crankin]

I am sure most people think my 3,000 sq. foot house with 3.5 baths is too big for the two of us. But, we bought it on a whim, because we were bored with our typical New England newer, center entrance colonial that was 2400 sq. feet, including the finished basement. I hated living in a Stepford neighborhood.
But, we got a very unique house, in a cool neighborhood, with a pond. We've spent a ton of $ making it ours. I am not ready to downsize, and except for the 2 "kids" bedrooms, we use every room in our house.
And I am definitely left leaning. And I tend to agree with Irulan. I earned the $ to buy the house, and I am not, generally an ostentatious person. I do like nice things and space.

[salsabike]

Not everyone who is affluent is full of hate or a social climber. Some people work darn hard for what they have and if they choose to put it into a big house instead of something else, so what? I swear, the manner in which some things go, in lightspeed fashion, to negative judgement is downright unfriendly.




Agreed.

[GLC1968]

Some people choose to spend their money on big, nice homes. Others on fancy cars. Others on fancy bikes. We personally spend a ton of money on groceries because I'm picky about what I eat and we can afford it. What's the difference?

While I agree that huge houses are often a waste of money, I also agree that this thread got more than just a tad judgemental. Who are we to judge what other people choose to spend their money on? Didn't Limewave say her friends desgined their house? That means to me that a lot of thought went into it. If they love it, good for them.

Personally, if I had a LOT of money (we are talking millions here), I'd design my own tiny house on a HUGE piece of property with spectacular views and a nice long driveway so that no road noise could be heard from the house. And I'd buy only the very best for what goes IN the house because I'm tired of junk that doesn't last as long as it should (like appliances and furniture). But that's just me. ;)

[indysteel]

As one of the people who got overly judgmental in this thread, I again want to apologize. I have friends with money who have bought nice houses with it and I haven't batted an eye. I have others that did the same thing that I have very good reason to believe were self-medicating in the same way that an addict might. Where my best friend is concerned, I have good reason to think it was the latter. So, yes, I have an opinion about it that goes beyond some knee jerk reaction to blatant consumerism. Do I think also think her 7000 square foot home for two is excessive. Yes, I do. Do I think a 3500 square foot home is? Not really. Is there a bright line about such things? No, but that doesn't mean it's a conversation not worth having. And I don't think it's wrong to encourage one another or others to consider other things other than their own needs or desires. We do that all the time with any number of environmental and social issues.

While I'd like to wholeheartedly agreed that how people spend their money is none of my concern, the reality is that sometimes it is. There are environmental concerns. There are economic concerns. There is a societal cost to more and bigger stuff. We don't make these very personal decisions in a vacuum.

[Biciclista]

while we're designing houses I want one on a hill with lots of windows and an attic bedroom with dormers. Two small bathrooms would be nice but I don't care how big my laundry room is. I discovered that big bedrooms were a big waste of space. Make the big rooms be the living room and kitchen.

[shootingstar]

It's wierd feeling that I have a place with 2 balconies...one off kitchen and other off bedroom.

And I still haven't gotten around to getting proper outdoor furniture to hang out in either. I can't afford it ..

Will get something simple for at least 1 of them maybe next year. I just ended up getting a place with happened to have 2 balconies, an extra but more important it is close to cycling routes, services, etc.

I have heard of stories where some people won a gorgeous huge new home in a lottery. But they couldn't afford to maintain because of high property tax, etc.

My desire for a smaller place is just pertaining to my personal preference and....laziness to look after more rooms, etc.

[zoom-zoom]

While I'd like to wholeheartedly agreed that how people spend their money is none of my concern, the reality is that sometimes it is. There are environmental concerns. There are economic concerns. There is a societal cost to more and bigger stuff. We don't make these very personal decisions in a vacuum.

This.

[salsabike]

And who gets to decide what's appropriate?

This too.

[PamNY]

7 bathrooms would be better. You could use one a day! put signs on them "Sunday" "Monday" etc so you didn't get mixed up.

That is such a good idea:D

Limewave I like Tulip's idea of baking something for them, if you like to bake.

I don't know why anybody wants a huge house.

[jessmarimba]

Thank you.

wow as someone who is househunting for an upgrade, all the negativity is a little.... um, whatever. Everyone has their reasons for bigger/smaller, fancier/simpler and just because it's not for you doesn't mean it's a bad thing. I can totally see being stumped about a housewarming present but why such a quick leap to judgement on people's housing?

We are in the process of looking for a new house that will meet our needs better, and yes, it is probably going to be a little bigger and a lot nicer. I guess I won't be talking about it here.



I just have an issue with beautiful old houses that are demolished to make room for mcmansions. A lot of people are raised to think that "new" means "maintenance-free" - and while maintenance on an old home can get tricky and downright expensive, the home I grew up in was fairly new when we bought it and had just as many issues b/c of poor construction and material quality. Not to mention all of the useless construction waste that fills up landfills on a regular basis because of the demolition of perfectly useful buildings. We certainly live in a disposable society. Though at least we don't have the political obsessions China has with demolishing EVERYTHING old to rebuild it again as new.

[zoom-zoom]

I just have an issue with beautiful old houses that are demolished to make room for mcmansions. A lot of people are raised to think that "new" means "maintenance-free" - and while maintenance on an old home can get tricky and downright expensive, the home I grew up in was fairly new when we bought it and had just as many issues b/c of poor construction and material quality. Not to mention all of the useless construction waste that fills up landfills on a regular basis because of the demolition of perfectly useful buildings. We certainly live in a disposable society.

My brother lives in an area about an hour NW of Chicago where miles and miles and miles of farmland now grow miles and miles and miles of look-alike mc mansions that were erected in a breathtakingly short span of time. His house was done in about 3 months from start to finish...and has had problem after problem. Now about a quarter of the houses in his 'hood are for sale...many in foreclosure (here is a BIG problem I have with a lot of these places, since they exist as a result of folks who felt the need to buy/build the biggest home they could, whether or not they could afford it. We can't just blame the banks for the bailout disaster, which we are ALL still paying for. It took two to tango with that mess). His is for sale because he wanted to live closer to the city with his girlfriend. He's SO not a suburbanite kind of guy. But he can't sell his home. So now he pays rent and a mortgage.

[indysteel]

I'd note that there has been some movement in certain communities to regulate and limit home size. Consider this (http://realestate.msn.com/article.aspx?cp-documentid=13107733) article on the "swelling McMansion backlash." Honesty, as judgmental as you may think it is, I'm not alone in my concern over rising home sizes. Nor am I alone in thinking that our seemingly personal decisions about how and where to live do impact our communities as a whole. From an NPR story (http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=5525283) on the average size of American homes, I found this quote from a Cornell professor of management and economics to be point: "We know there are all sorts of situations where individual choices that are perfectly rational add up to a total outcome that none of us likes very much. [Large homes] is one of those."

[zoom-zoom]

This scenario (http://tinyurl.com/25z2pl5) really gets me. This house wasn't enough:
Main house: 12,000 square feet
Number of bedrooms: 5
Bathrooms: 8 1/2
Garage: 3-car
Guest house: 1,100 square feet
Value: $4.5 million

So it was demolished for this:
Main house: 22,000 square feet
Number of bedrooms: 3
Bathrooms: 5 full and 5 half-baths
Garage: 3 buildings
Guest house: 6,000 square feet
Value: Still being assessed; building permits over $3 million (total finished value was guesstimated to be ~$10 mil.)

Seriously? A 22 thousand square foot home with only 3 bedrooms and a guest home almost 3x larger than the average American home.

No one can ever tell me that this isn't purely for show. And the sad part is that the house they razed was really kind of cool looking. It was low and subtle and blended into the property. The new place is a monstrosity whether viewed from the street or from the lake. Gargantuan and gaudy.

[salsabike]

I'm not alone in my concern over rising home sizes. Nor am I alone in thinking that our seemingly personal decisions about how and where to live do impact our communities as a whole.

Indy, of course you're not alone. I share those concerns too. I think a lot of people do. What I say below is NOT in response to your particular comments at all.

Most people on this forum live much more comfortably than most of the world does. Even if your houses are small and you only have one bathroom. I'm not a big fan of putting small groups of "other" people down for being wealthy, in that context.

[Bike Writer]

One poster suggested home baked goods. This gets my vote for a housewarming gift, provided you enjoy baking and want to do that. If baking is not your thing then perhaps specialty coffee or teas. Everyone likes treats and even if the homeowners don't particularly care for coffee or tea they could serve them for guests.

Your original post suggested a very natural human response and that is comparison. We all do that about things whether it is cars, bikes, kids or homes and in the presence of largess it's not that hard to feel dwarfed. I loved your response to that feeling in that you went home and began scrubbing your floors. That might be something I would do too.

You saw something enormous and overwhelming and were in awe of it and in the process you peered into a lifestyle that is very different from that of most people. Your post did not indicate a hint of envy or scorn for that lifestyle, just a realization that it is very different from your own and that is very natural.

I was born into modest living, in some of my years I throughly enjoyed bigger and better and lots of "toys". I'm a bit older now and my tastes have changed and things I value have changed also.

To each his own, live and let live are comfortable words to live by.

[snapdragen]

We have our own super-monster house in my neighborhood. There are a few mini-monsters, I hate 'em, but they're not mine, so I ignore them. But this one....gawd, talk about your sore thumbs.. Almost 6,000 sq ft, 5 bedrooms, 5.5 baths. Most homes here are about 2500 sq ft. ranch style homes.

The first owners lost it to forclosure, I think it's already on it's third set of owners.

http://i64.photobucket.com/albums/h181/snapdragen/MsgBoards/monster2.jpg

http://i64.photobucket.com/albums/h181/snapdragen/MsgBoards/monster.jpg

[limewave]

This scenario (http://www.mlive.com/news/grand-rapids/index.ssf/2010/09/amway_heir_****_and_betsy_devo.html) really gets me. This house wasn't enough:
Main house: 12,000 square feet
Number of bedrooms: 5
Bathrooms: 8 1/2
Garage: 3-car
Guest house: 1,100 square feet
Value: $4.5 million

So it was demolished for this:
Main house: 22,000 square feet
Number of bedrooms: 3
Bathrooms: 5 full and 5 half-baths
Garage: 3 buildings
Guest house: 6,000 square feet
Value: Still being assessed; building permits over $3 million (total finished value was guesstimated to be ~$10 mil.)


Where was this at?

I got a full tour yesterday. There are many secret passageways and hidden rooms. There's even a panic room. It's pretty cool. The reason they have so many bedrooms (and 4 kitchens!) is that they have guests that will stay with them for several months at a time. The mother-in-law is currently visiting them for 3 months and will eventually live with them full-time I imagine.

These people have more money than I can even dream of. As DH said, the interest on their savings alone could probably build that house every year. And in a time when no one has been building, they employed quite a few people over the last year. I'm thankful they reinvested the money locally.

[zoom-zoom]

Where was this at?

South Shore Dr., in Holland...about halfway down towards Lake MI.

Ha, now I notice that the URL was messed-up because it contains the word d*ck. It's the DeVos house. Let me fix that with Tinyurl...
Here's a functioning link (http://tinyurl.com/25z2pl5).

[Bike Writer]

I was just in Holland this week, sure wish I could have seen this from the water. WOW, what a house!

[limewave]

You saw something enormous and overwhelming and were in awe of it and in the process you peered into a lifestyle that is very different from that of most people. Your post did not indicate a hint of envy or scorn for that lifestyle, just a realization that it is very different from your own and that is very natural.

Surprisingly, I didn't feel any twinges of jealousy. However, I DO get VERY jealous when I read about new bikes on this forum! :):eek::):eek: Which is why you almost never see me comment on those threads :p

[Tri Girl]

Holy Schnikeys!!! The guest house alone would house half my neighborhood. ;)

[channlluv]

The article says they want that house to be a gathering place for multiple generations of their family, and I take that to mean extended family, as it's a vacation home, or so it's described in the article. It looks like a hotel or a B&B to me.

As for three bedrooms, I think a room has to have a closet to be listed as a bedroom. There may be a dozen more non-closet rooms that may provide sleeping quarters for all the cousins, but I'm guessing.

As for buying bigger and better, it doesn't really bother me all that much if the person doing the buying can afford it. We live pretty modestly, ourselves, but DH has no problem plunking down some serious cash on bikes. It's about priorities.

I have a friend who is building one of those huge houses on a canyon near where they currently live -- I tease her and call it a compound because it will have multiple buildings and a huge pool, etc. -- but she's doing it to provide homes for her parents and her mother-in-law, and for her kids and their families when they grow up, plus they'll be doing summer camp enrichment-type stuff like yoga and dance and art classes and all sorts of stuff like that for their many friends and their kids during the summer. I'm kind of happy to be in that group.

Roxy

P.S. As for the housewarming gift, I'd pick a dozen or so pretty bulbs to plant. Something that will grow and multiply, like daylilies, and then every time they bloom, she'll think of you.

[Biciclista]

We have our own super-monster house in my neighborhood. There are a few mini-monsters, I hate 'em, but they're not mine, so I ignore them. But this one....gawd, talk about your sore thumbs.. Almost 6,000 sq ft, 5 bedrooms, 5.5 baths. Most homes here are about 2500 sq ft. ranch style homes.

The first owners lost it to forclosure, I think it's already on it's third set of owners.

http://i64.photobucket.com/albums/h181/snapdragen/MsgBoards/monster2.jpg

http://i64.photobucket.com/albums/h181/snapdragen/MsgBoards/monster.jpg
It looks like a village.

[shootingstar]

Well, in some vicarous way it is interesting to know someone and visit a large home...mansion like, etc.

In our building, we sneaked up to see the penthouse before they sold it.

We were underwhelmed and couldn't see why it was worth paying the extra $$$$ for more space but everything else wasn't extra special.

[RadicalEdward]

For a house warming gift - if you haven't already sorted something else out

When we moved into our home some friends of ours gave us a folder with all of the local restaurant take-away menus
They both had written little notes on each of them on what was best to order at each, or directions or where to sit when eating in
It's been absolutely invaluable - and was the best house warming gift I've ever gotten
Thoughtful - and cost them nothing except time :)

[salsabike]

For a house warming gift - if you haven't already sorted something else out

When we moved into our home some friends of ours gave us a folder with all of the local restaurant take-away menus
They both had written little notes on each of them on what was best to order at each, or directions or where to sit when eating in
It's been absolutely invaluable - and was the best house warming gift I've ever gotten
Thoughtful - and cost them nothing except time :)

What a great gift!

[KnottedYet]

For a house warming gift - if you haven't already sorted something else out

When we moved into our home some friends of ours gave us a folder with all of the local restaurant take-away menus
They both had written little notes on each of them on what was best to order at each, or directions or where to sit when eating in
It's been absolutely invaluable - and was the best house warming gift I've ever gotten
Thoughtful - and cost them nothing except time :)

Wow! That is a great gift idea!

How perfect for anyone who might be moving into a new neighborhood.

[Tri Girl]

For a house warming gift - if you haven't already sorted something else out

When we moved into our home some friends of ours gave us a folder with all of the local restaurant take-away menus
They both had written little notes on each of them on what was best to order at each, or directions or where to sit when eating in
It's been absolutely invaluable - and was the best house warming gift I've ever gotten
Thoughtful - and cost them nothing except time :)

Yes! This for sure!!!! I would have LOVED to have gotten that when we moved into our new neighborhood!

[Brandi]

6 1/2 bathrooms? Really? REALLY?

[snapdragen]

6 1/2 bathrooms? Really? REALLY?

Bet they don't have mold either....:D;):D

[laura*]

As for three bedrooms, I think a room has to have a closet to be listed as a bedroom. There may be a dozen more non-closet rooms that may provide sleeping quarters for all the cousins, but I'm guessing.

Hmmm, maybe they are playing the house value assessment game: The number of bedrooms might be a factor in what the government assessor calculates. Plus, based on the style of the new house, I bet the owners might prefer armoires instead of closets.

[grey]

Some people choose to spend their money on big, nice homes. Others on fancy cars. Others on fancy bikes. We personally spend a ton of money on groceries because I'm picky about what I eat and we can afford it. What's the difference?

Personally, if I had a LOT of money (we are talking millions here), I'd design my own tiny house on a HUGE piece of property with spectacular views and a nice long driveway so that no road noise could be heard from the house. And I'd buy only the very best for what goes IN the house because I'm tired of junk that doesn't last as long as it should (like appliances and furniture). But that's just me. ;)

This describes us exactly. We don't have a huge house (1,200 sq ft, with a separate in-law suite we can rent out if we want to, it's 400sq ft). But we are saving, saving, working toward a large piece of land where we can either fix up a beat up little house or build our own, totally off grid. Not anyone else's idea of paradise, but it would be ours. Big garden - because we also spend a LOT of money on good food.

Some people like their McMansions. I don't really want to have that much to clean, or to have to buy that much furniture, or have a big pool to keep up (or pay to clean it) but that's ok, all of us are different.

[Rebekah H]

My husband is from SC and we have a house there that is in the 3000 sqft range. I could never keep up with it! Something always needed cleaning that didn't even get used and it was too spread out. A few years ago, we decided that we would build a vacation house in Louisiana so that we could spend half of the year here to be near my family more. It's around 1600 sqft and I couldn't be happier. I can't stand the upkeep that larger houses require and really, really appreciate the necessity of keeping your crap to a minimum that comes along with a smaller house because my husband is "sentimental." (Homeboy is a freaking hoarder.)

The folder is an awesome housewarming gift!! If I lived in the city, that would have been an amazing gift to receive. My personal favorite gift, for any occasion, is booze. Unless the person is a teetotaler, you can't go wrong!

[rollinat]

Speaking as a fairly recent transplant to the US from the UK, I have to admit to loving the bigger American houses. We had a fairly typical 4-bedroom single family home in the UK - we don't tend to talk about square footage the same as here, but I estimated it to be around 1200 sqft - so a fairly decent size, and similar to the house I grew up in and my parents still live in. Coming to live in a 3000 sqft home is bliss! - it's not a constant battle of trying to find places to put "stuff" (we have kids)' and of course if we have visitors now they stay for a couple of weeks or more so it's great to not feel you are tripping over people all the time. And garages big enough to actually park your cars in! - we had a single garage before which was full of bikes, camping stuff, DIY stuff etc etc. I LOVE living in the US!!

[Crankin]

Everyone is different, but I am sure that I don't need the 3,000 sq. ft. house I have. But, I love it. I wish I had it when my kids were teens. But, we had a 2100 sq. ft. house with a 300 sq. ft. finished basement, and it was fine. We built a huge screened in porch on the last house (2 rms) and that added a lot of space for 4 months out of the year. I don't need a Mc Mansion, but I have serious qualms about moving into a townhouse (our next move). I really want 3 bedrooms and perhaps a lower level family room and DH thinks 2 bedrooms are OK. It's not so much the size, just the amount of rooms. I need my space. Well, it won't be for at least 5 years, so we have time to decide.

[smilingcat]

Seriously, what do you get them for a housewarming gift? I really want to welcome them to the neighborhood, but everything I can think of to give them seems podunky.

Give them something from your heart. They have money to spend with wanton disregard. Sounds bit too gaudy for my taste. Can we say Trump, Liberace in Vegas. Yuck. nouveau riche. Sorry but that is what they come across as. But hey, it's a free country, they can spend how they like. No I'm not jealous.

My new place is around 2400sq ft. It's much bigger than we need but the view is to die for. And the size of the property was tad on the smaller side than what I wanted but I can plant about dozen fruit trees and add another dozen or so blueberry bush... I'm loving the place, the house...

Gainfully unemployed is nice too. I wake up in the morning, sip on my chai latte, listen to the traffic report and go, "wow I'm glad I don't have that stress anymore.." then gaze at the panoramic view of Mt. Hood. I love the slower pace of life. Play with my cats, dogs...

[limewave]

When I imagine myself winning the lottery or coming into millions of dollars from an unknown wealthy relative, I picture myself staying exactly where I'm at with my same job . . . but with infinitely less stress. Not having to worry about money for the kids future or retirement. Being able to travel when and where we want. Putting new siding on the house and updating the kitchen. A house keeper to clean while I bike. Things like that. I guess I'm not a big dreamer . . .

As for the house-warming gift: I went with a folder filled with a "wealth" of information on the neighborhood! They are from a different city so I thought it was a fitting gift to get them acquainted with their new home. I included our top 5 pizza places, menu's from our favorite restaurants, business cards and flyers from places I thought they may frequent, a "popcorn bucket" from the local gas station that gives the owner free popcorn for the year. DH thought that was a little tacky, but they have movie theater popcorn! And the buckets sell-out every year, so I thought it was a fun "local" gift.

[Rebekah H]

That's a perfect gift! I don't think it's tacky at all.

[zoom-zoom]

That popcorn is like crack...I would love one of those buckets! :D

[NbyNW]

I think you done good, Limewave!

[Tri Girl]

I think you done good, Limewave!

Agreed!!

Sounds like the prefect welcome gift!!!

[Selkie]

I fall into the "each to his/her own" crowd, although I do agree w/Mimi's point about social responsibility.

Always find it amusing when people have to compare their homes/possessions w/mine ("my house is bigger than yours is, nah nah nah!"). As if I'm a loser for choosing that simple is better for me. I just ignore it, change the subject. Actually, it's kind of sad when someone puts so much value on material possessions because those can disappear in the blink of an eye.

I thought smaller homes were becoming chic for those to whom things like that matter?

Our house is very small -- 2 br, one bath but a toilet in the basement, next to the dryer -- built in 1940. We consider ourselves fortunate to have purchased it before the big real estate boom. There is a lot of infill in our neighborhood, which is distressing. They tear down these solid, brick on brick constructed homes to put up big plasterboard mcmansions that don't fit in w/the surrounding homes. I love the older pre-war/ww2 era homes, imagine the folks who lived in them, kids raised in them, etc.

[divingbiker]

Our house is very small -- 2 br, one bath but a toilet in the basement, next to the dryer -- built in 1940. We consider ourselves fortunate to have purchased it before the big real estate boom... I love the older pre-war/ww2 era homes, imagine the folks who lived in them, kids raised in them, etc.

Hijack here--I could have written this, down to the size of the house and when I bought it. I bought my tiny house from an elderly woman who had lived there (and smoked, ick) for 40 years. She and her husband raised their son there.

A storage area under the screened porch was padlocked when I bought the place. After about 5 years, I cut off the padlock and found the son's hideout. He had a desk and chair, light, carpet, fixed up very cute. I found two plastic bodybuilder figurines and a 50s era girlie magazine. His name was drawn in the concrete floor.

When I moved in, the neighborhood was full of elderly people who had lived there for years. Now they've all died, and I'm the old-timer on the block.