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marni
04-15-2011, 08:26 PM
I have decided that I need to talk to the breast surgeon before mid May to answer questions and concerns. I left a message Wednesday, talked to her nurse on Thursday and then when I called back at 11:30 today I got no answer because the office closes at 12:00 on Fridays, and apparently they turn off the phone well before hand. ARGHHH!!!!!

In the meantime I have been researching cancer support groups and have yet to find one locally which is not affiliated with a church. No that I am against anybody's religion, I just would prefer a more rational and objective type group that is not trying to convert me while helping me.

I am also having bad dreams, not nightmares, but definitely anxiety expressing dreams about trying to get through a major household move and not showing up in presurgery on time, or not recovering from surgery and ending up a vegetable.

I know this is all anxiety venting, and that none of this is likely and am trying very hard not to obsess but ..... I don't expect anyone to suggest something, I just needed to vent a little. Ignore this freely as you feel. My new mantra needs to be something like I can get through this, I can do this, I will do this.

just venting and letting things out because there is more room out than in.

thanks for listening.

PamNY
04-15-2011, 08:55 PM
I think you are wise to talk to the surgeon sooner rather than later -- mid-May is a long time. I hope you can find a support group you are happy with. Some religious ones might be more low-key than others, but you know best what you need.

Dreams sound perfectly normal to me. So does venting. Keeping a good thought for you.

jelee1311
04-15-2011, 08:55 PM
You can and you will get through this. Sending more hugs and cancer can suck it!

snapdragen
04-15-2011, 09:21 PM
marni, have you tried the American Cancer Society? They might have suggestions for you.

Your dreams sound perfectly normal to me, considering what you're going through.

KnottedYet
04-15-2011, 10:44 PM
Team Survivor: http://teamsurvivor.org/doc.aspx?9

Not just biking, yoga, dragon boating, etc. They also have support groups. If there is one in your area they can put you in contact with a LOT of resources.

OakLeaf
04-16-2011, 02:34 AM
((((((((marni))))))))

Most cancer hospitals have their own support groups - I would think that you could go to a group at a different hospital from the one your surgeon is affiliated with.

You might look into a counseling center or psychology practice (or your hospital's psych department) as well - professionally led group therapy isn't the same thing as a peer support group, but it can be enormously helpful in different ways.

Crankin
04-16-2011, 04:24 AM
I was going to suggest the same thing; our local community mental health clinic has professionally led groups for coping with all types of things, including cancer. And, I would also call the hospital that is the "best" for treating cancer in your area to see if there are hospital affiliated groups.
The religious thing would bug me, too. I think that is very regional...

indysteel
04-16-2011, 05:14 AM
Marni, I'm so sorry for what you're going through. I just did a Google search for breast cancer support groups in Houston. A couple of the results looked promising. You might check out Rosebudssupport.org and weathervanefoundation.org. The latter is affiliated with a hospital.

Hang in there. Sending you virtual (((())).

MomOnBike
04-16-2011, 08:52 AM
I agree. May is too long to wait, if only for mental health reasons.

On the other hand, the fact that they feel that they can wait is a Good Sign. If they had wanted to see you that afternoon in order to schedule procedures the next morning, you'd have every right to freak out. (not that you don't now. . .)

I didn't do much with support groups, other than the wonderful people here and my family, so I can't help you much there. Of course, the support group offered me met on Tuesday nights, which is the night DH & I get on our bikes and go see a half-price movie. (Priorities, and all)

In any case, keep your chin up, vent in this general direction, and contact the surgeon's office on Monday. Let us know how it comes out.

szsz
04-16-2011, 01:29 PM
I have decided that I need to talk to the breast surgeon before mid May to answer questions and concerns.

Definitely do this and also, have you thought about a second opinion? Not that it would change anything, but for me, talking to a second surgeon confirmed I had made the right choice with my first team so I felt very confident going into it. Also, another set of eyes on things can't hurt. And it was something to do between dx and surgery, which for me was several weeks.

Someone above mentioned the American Cancer Society -- a great resource. Apparently they can hook you up with another woman (local) who has experienced your same diagnosis. I did not do this, but many women in my support group expressed how helpful this was for them.

It sounds like you are wanting answers to questions -- which is of course natural. Not having answers = anxiety! Are you writing your concerns down? I have a cancer notebook that I brought to every appointment and had next to me whenever I was on the phone. Brought lots of peace of mind.

Keeping you in my best thoughts.

AnnieBikes
04-18-2011, 12:22 PM
Marni, sorry to hear about your ongoing issues. Please don't be put off by church located support groups. Our local group meets in a church because the church offers its space to community groups. It does not preach or whatever. It is just their meeting place, just like my meeting place for my quilters group. It just happens that a member of our group belongs to that church and knows someone to talk to in order to get the space.

Thinking of you.

marni
04-18-2011, 07:17 PM
The emotional roller coaster seems to have eased off a bit over the last few days. Today the trainer did an evaluation of my 3 month goal of increasing everything (weight, reps, resistance) by 10% every three months. I am a bit surprised that not only have I achieved the 10% but in most exercises by 20-25%. I have gone from barely being able to do 15 leg presses at 160 to 20 repeats at 210 and still being able to finish the work out and do an hour on the elliptical or treadmill. Haven't lost much weight, only a pound, and the body fat (by caliper measurement) is still at 26.6 and by diameter measurements at 20.5% and I was hoping that that would go down a bit more. Still and all maybe the strength gain is also worth something.

Spent the hour of cardio endurance on the elliptical listening to some good driving hard pounding music chanting affirmations to keep the rhythm and feeling like a soldier in basic training except I wasn't doing it out loud.

In addition, the Sag guy has the week off which means it will be easier for him to come with me to the Dr. consultation on Thursday.

As everyone has constantly reminded me, day by day, step by step. So I am enjoying the upswing.

Possegal
04-18-2011, 07:30 PM
Is there a Gilda's Club near you? I've no experience with them - my sister still hasn't wanted to go to any sort of support group. But others I know thought very highly of the programs they had.

Glad the rollercoaster has eased up. I hope it continues to do so as it most definitely sucks.

redrhodie
04-19-2011, 07:17 AM
Spent the hour of cardio endurance on the elliptical listening to some good driving hard pounding music chanting affirmations to keep the rhythm and feeling like a soldier in basic training except I wasn't doing it out loud.


I like this image of you as a soldier. Very powerful.