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limewave
12-16-2010, 04:48 AM
I need your help! If you were an elementary school teacher, what gift would you like from a student?

sfa
12-16-2010, 04:55 AM
A sincere thank-you note written by your child is the number one item I've heard teachers like to get--it's meaningful, heartfelt, and doesn't take up space in their home or need dusting.

My sister (teaches K-8 music) also likes disposable stuff--edible treats, poinsettias, etc.

Giftcards are also popular--Barnes and Noble and Target go over well, or giftcards to restaurants and coffeeshops if you know the teacher likes those places.

malkin
12-16-2010, 05:03 AM
I agree, notes or kind words are good. Cute/funny stuff that applies to a specific kid is good too--like a pack of bandaids from the parent of a kid who bites.

Often, I have re-gifted the other 'standard gift" stuff immediately.

The gifts of soap and lotion always make me wonder if I might have some personal hygiene issue that I am not aware of. I guess if anyone gives me deodorant or mouthwash I will know for sure!

jessmarimba
12-16-2010, 05:49 AM
I always think it's cool when the kids - especially the boys! - give baked goods that they made. That is, if you trust them to not do anything nasty to the food.

(I just teach extra-curricular music, but I volunteered one fall for a school that was 50 miles away and I would go in after my normal office day. They had nothing to pay me, but I've never taught a more thankful group of kids. A bunch of them got together and made white chocolate macadamia nut cookies...YUM)

Veronica
12-16-2010, 06:00 AM
Notes written by the kid are really nice. If you have to give me a gift, I'd rather get gift cards. If you know the teacher really likes a certain place (I get a lot of REI cards :D) that makes it more personal. Barnes and Noble is always a good choice.

I use to like to get plants, but Cassie tries to eat them or is afraid of them. :rolleyes: Makes it hard to enjoy them at home and our classrooms are too small to allocate much space for plants. Although, those small cactus gardens are kind of cute.

Last year my hall passes kept disappearing. One of my kids made replacements on his computer and had them laminated. That was an awesome gift! Very thoughtful and meaningful to me.

I still have a card from a 5th grade girl (who's now a sophomore in college.) She drew a picture of me, sitting in my chair and reading aloud to the class with a nice note inside.

No ornaments, candles, coffee mugs, cheap chocolate, or bath stuff. Unless you know they like that kind of thing.

Veronica

Becky
12-16-2010, 06:18 AM
No ornaments, candles, coffee mugs, cheap chocolate, or bath stuff. Unless you know they like that kind of thing.


This. My mother, who is an elementary school teacher, is allergic to most fragrances and ends up giving away all of that candle/bath/fragrance stuff.

Consumable items seem to be a bigger hit.

OakLeaf
12-16-2010, 07:11 AM
Consumable items seem to be a bigger hit.

... but then there's my mom, who's struggled with her weight for years, and was recently diagnosed with Type 2 diabetes ... it's a lot easier to re-gift toiletries than cookies. Just in general, holidays already have plenty of opportunities for over-consumption without adding to the problem for someone else.

What about an indoor herb garden? (not one of those expensive hydroponic rigs, just the ones with the little window pots)

Can you go in with other parents for a bigger gift? A spa day? A year of Netflix?

badgercat
12-16-2010, 07:25 AM
Can you go in with other parents for a bigger gift? A spa day? A year of Netflix?
I think I remember our "room moms" organizing things like this at least a couple times when I was in elementary school. The teacher didn't end up with a bunch of cr@p and it also helped any kids whose family wasn't interested or couldn't afford to give a gift to the teacher from feeling awkward the last day before winter break since *no one* was giving individual presents.

I was really into arts and crafts, so in 2nd grade I gave my teacher a Christmas-themed cross-stitch with her name on it--I told my mom what I wanted to do, she helped me design the pattern on graph paper, then I stitched it--I was also a teacher's pet :rolleyes:

Crankin
12-16-2010, 08:40 AM
I always liked getting gift cards to places like Starbucks, or unusual food items. One time, a boy gave me gourmet pasta, in the shape of dreidels.
I had so many Dunkin Donuts coffee cards (I don't like that place), that I gave them to DH and he just used them up, after 3 years.

ame
12-16-2010, 10:42 AM
These gifts are making me broke! (But, we have such great teachers) This year my daughter made "dinner and dessert" in jars (Soup and Cookies). She's 6 and it was easy enough for her to participate, and with 9 teachers between my 2 children it was still cost effective and fast. I got the jars at <shudder> Walmart and printed the tags on sheets of photo paper. Here's the link I used: http://christmas.organizedhome.com/gifts-crafts-gift-tags/gifts-in-a-jar-recipe-index I also gave her class a book.

tulip
12-16-2010, 10:54 AM
Is this a new thing? I don't ever recalling giving teachers gifts. Not that they didn't deserve them, but it certainly was not done.

Until I was in the 8th grade, I was in a bunch of different elementary schools. I was one of the kids who got reduced/free lunch. There was no way my mom would have been able to buy my teachers gifts. And there was no pressure to do so. No one did, not even the rich kids.

Just wondering when this all came about...

Cataboo
12-16-2010, 11:14 AM
I don't remember ever doing it when I was young - My sister does it currently for her daughter's teachers. Her daughter has medical issues, so the teachers do sometimes have to do an awful lot more for her daughter though.

I did get a note from my 4th grade teacher recently (my niece had just started at my old elementary school and ran into my 4th grade teacher), so it was awfully nice being remembered. I emailed her. She was quite happy I'd remembered her and how much I remembered of her class.

Veronica
12-16-2010, 11:50 AM
I don't know when it started. I was a bit shocked the first year I was teaching and got gifts. That was 19 years ago.

Veronica

zoom-zoom
12-16-2010, 02:18 PM
I like what Dane's teacher asked for...a charitable donation in his name, if we chose to gift.

Veronica
12-16-2010, 02:25 PM
I like what Dane's teacher asked for...a charitable donation in his name, if we chose to gift.

I'd love to know how the teacher worded that suggestion. So I can copy him next year!

As a teacher of young, impressionable children (with parents who don't always read everything or sometimes even English) I've been reluctant to suggest that. You don't want it to sound like it's expected or that you're not grateful.

Veronica

Crankin
12-16-2010, 02:44 PM
Well, I started teaching in 1976 and I got gifts; not so many in the beginning, but I had many years of receiving delicious homemade tamales from my students or lasagna.
I never gave gifts as a kid, back in the dark ages, in elementary school. But, since there were only like, 5 non-Jewish kids in my elementary school, X-Mas gifts were not on the radar. I remember in maybe 5th or 6th grade, the room mothers getting together and giving a class gift to the teacher.

redrhodie
12-16-2010, 03:22 PM
How about a donation to a good cause? I'd probably want that if I were a teacher.


ETA: Oops, I missed this was already suggested.

malkin
12-16-2010, 04:02 PM
We never gave holiday gifts to teachers when I was growing up (60s-70s), and I didn't do it as a parent (90s-00s, except for funny stuff or needed stuff which we brought in at any time of the year.

I noticed this year that some of the staff I work with really expect gifts and know which parents did and didn't gift.

We also have a ton of staff to staff gifting which I think is excessive, and we had a staff collection of cash for two of our families (who somehow missed the application for another charity) which I think is inappropriate as a 'dual relationship' which we as health care providers must avoid. (We're not a real school, we're a Mental Health Day Treatment Facility.)

zoom-zoom
12-16-2010, 04:20 PM
I'd love to know how the teacher worded that suggestion. So I can copy him next year!

As a teacher of young, impressionable children (with parents who don't always read everything or sometimes even English) I've been reluctant to suggest that. You don't want it to sound like it's expected or that you're not grateful.

Veronica

He said "if your family is considering giving a gift to Crystal and I, we would like you to consider one of the following websites: worldvisiongifts.org or seva.org. There are a variety of gifts to choose from that change lives and demonstrate compassion. Thank you." (Crystal is the classroom assistant)

Veronica
12-16-2010, 04:40 PM
Thanks! I copied and pasted it into my plan book. Presents are fun, but I really I don't need more stuff. Really, what I want is for parents to make sure the kid does the homework, reads for 20 minutes every day and knows all the basic facts.

Of course the kids who give presents are the ones who are on the ball. Do you suppose there's a correlation there? :D

Veronica

tulip
12-16-2010, 06:29 PM
I think the best gift would be for the students to do their best work all year long, and be respectful and polite.

Veronica and other teachers--do you find that you or other teachers "keep score" on which students give presents (and what they give) and which do not? It seems like a really bad system to set up those kindof expectations from students, even if the expectations are perceived and not real from the teachers' points of view.

I just don't think it should be the norm to give teachers presents. Same for office gift-giving. It just doesn't seem right to me because it's like gift giving out of obligation or pressure, and that's pretty much contrary to the notion of giving gifts in the first place. That's not something that I would want to teach a kid.

But here we are stuck in the system, I suppose. I did not participate in gift giving activities like Secret Santa at my old job. Nor did I participate in giving to the family that the office "adopted." I participate in bettering the world in my own way. I got some dirty looks, since employees were "encouraged" to sign up, so everyone knew what everyone else was doing. My new job does not do gifts, thankfully.

Veronica
12-16-2010, 06:44 PM
I don't "keep score." I do send thank you cards to the kids who gave me gifts. I do give my students a gift - something little since I need to get 30 or more, usually academic related. :D

I think part of it is showing appreciation and that they have a relationship with you. I don't think they feel obligated. The grins on their faces when they hand me the gift are priceless and they can't wait for me to open them. You gotta remember I spend 6 hours a day, 5 days a week with these guys. They get attached. And so do I.

Veronica

tulip
12-16-2010, 06:59 PM
Thanks for explaining, Veronica. It's nice to get another perspective, and I'm glad it's positive for you and the kiddos.

jdubble
12-16-2010, 09:55 PM
This year, my sons' teachers are getting apple pie filling that we canned this summer using apples from our backyard gravenstein tree, and a $10 gift card to Powells Books.

Last year, the boys and I made different chocolate barks with peppermint and toffee, and I bought little glass jars at Ikea to put it in for a couple bucks each, figuring the jars could be used for whatever after the candy was gone.

A friend and I made cute simple aprons for the preschool teachers a couple years ago. I made herbed vinegar another year - bought some nice bottles at the kitchen supply store around the corner, poured in some plain vinegar, my son stuck in rosemary, peppercorns, thyme, etc. Wrapped a ribbon around the bottle and let them sit for while to infuse the flavors. We also made "sand art brownie mix" (layered brownie ingredients in a mason jar) another time.

Crankin
12-17-2010, 03:15 AM
Veronica explained it perfectly. The relationship between students and teachers is unique.
I *do* like that I am out of the atmosphere of staff to staff giving. At the end of my teaching career I gave small, personalized type gifts to my teammates (3-4 others), and to all of the assistants who co-taught with me, usually 1-2. But, at one point, I was giving to a lot of others in the school. There were just a lot of women who were so into the holidays, it was crazy. I've participated in Secret Santa some of the time. One of the funniest gifts I got was when my department did a Secret Santa. I got a box of "Condom-mints." It was from a very quiet, young male substitute teacher. I never quite got why he chose this for me, but it was a conversation piece.
Of course, therapists don't exchange gifts, but the administrative staff at my clinic are going nuts with the holiday stuff. There is hardly any work being done when I go in the chart room. Yesterday, when I left, three women were having a heated discussion about when they stopped believing in Santa and all of the holiday food they are making; I smiled, but it's hard to listen to this all of the time.

channlluv
12-17-2010, 08:17 AM
I am an elementary school librarian, and I work with about 300 kids on a weekly basis. I have received several gifts this week, including chocolate (which I share), cookies (also shared, except for the ones made by my gourmet chef friend, which I savored), homemade granola, a handmade ceramic plate by a mom who volunteers in the library and is a good friend (I also bought a similar plate from her to give to my mother-in-law who collects Santas), a little bottle of bubble bath, a $10 Starbucks gift card and a $25 Amazon gift card, both of which came from a fundraiser our school ran about a month ago in advance of the holidays.

I love every bit of it, because every single one of them came with a hug and a "thank you for what you do for our kids" message.

My daughter's teachers' room parents sent out a message a week or so ago making it clear that the teachers and aides were not requesting gifts by any means, but that several other parents had asked what they might want or need, so the room parents sent this message with a list of places the teachers like to shop/eat so that those of us who wanted to could buy gift cards.

This year I bought each of them a $5 Starbucks card and my daughter wrote a personal note in the card thanking each of them for something specific to do with her schoolwork/activities.

In the past, she and I have made sugar scrub scented with white ginger and put it in glass Ball or Mason jars I buy at ACE Hardware (and her Kindergarten teacher still raves about it, eight years later and even asked me how to make it so she could do it for her friends and family), or we've made cookies together and given them plates of goodies. We've also made donations in teachers' names to Heiffer Intl. (which they loved)

I gave all of my library volunteer moms a pretty angel Christmas ornament (they all celebrate Christmas) from Crate and Barrel. ($2.95 each)

We do Secret Santa here, too, and, among the standard chocolate, tea, and flowers, I received the coolest gift ever this year: a bouquet of porcupine quills, with a note explaining that according to Native American legend, they represent innocence and playfulness and ward off negativity.

The very best part of my week is reading aloud to the kids -- I make it very playful and fun, so I figure she absolutely nailed me with that gift. Plus, my BA is in Anthropology and I spent my entire senior year leading a field team digging up Creek sites near Montgomery and counting trade beads in the state archives building. I love this gift. And they're beautiful. I can't wait to get them home to put on my desk.


It's really all about appreciation. When you notice and acknowledge someone's attention or contribution to your life (in this case, your children's lives), I think that kind of thing is really appreciated by the giftee. Or it should be, anyway, and it's good for the giver to acknowledge and express appreciation of others' work or effort on their behalf. It's all positive and foments more positive work/effort.

Roxy

P.S. One of the moms just came and gave me a big hug and thanked me for working with the kids so well, and handed me $75 in gift cards from the parent council. Yes, i'll admit it. Being appreciated feels good on multiple levels.

jessmarimba
12-17-2010, 08:44 AM
Umm...can you share the sugar scrub recipe? :)

channlluv
12-17-2010, 09:18 AM
You bet. It's the easiest thing in the world.

You'll need a big glass bowl and something to mix the sugar, baby oil, and scented essential oils with, plus a metal spoon or measuring cup to dip the sugar scrub into the jars. (A plastic mixing bowl will retain the oil and scent and ruin whatever you put in it next, but glass washes up nice. Metal would probably also work, but I ruined a plastic bowl the first time I made this.)

1 or 2 5lb bags of granulated sugar, depending on how much you want to make. Salt would also work.

1 or 2 bottles of unscented baby oil -- the regular size ones, not the little ones. I get the Johnson & Johnson brand that is enriched with vitamin E and jojoba oil.

Several vials of scented essential oils. You'll need two for each 1 bag of sugar/bottle of baby oil. I get white ginger from Henry's, but sandalwood is also nice, if a bit strong. This is the only expensive ingredient -- the ones I buy are around $6 a vial.

Several glass jars -- I use the pint-size jars for canning jellies and such, but I've also used larger glass containers that I found at Cost Plus International Market. The larger the container, though, the more sugar scrub you're going to need. One 5lb bag of sugar makes about six pint-size jars of scrub, if I remember right. (I might have that wrong, though. I make two batches and buy two flats of jars and I always have jars left over.)

Here's the fun part:

In the large glass bowl, mix one 5 lb. bag of sugar with one bottle of baby oil and fold in the two vials of essential oil using a wooden mixing spoon you don't mind tossing out after, or something that will wash up well. You could use your hands, but you'll exfoliate as you go, which isn't hygenic if you're gifting this to someone else.

It will be mushy and wet with oil. It takes several minutes of mixing to get the essential oils distributed throughout the sugar mixture. Meanwhile, your kitchen will smell scrumptious.

I have my daughter make labels using 2" x 4" mailing labels and we tie pretty ribbons around the lids and wrap them with pretty tissue paper and raffia.

WARNING:

The one warning I have with this is that if the giftee is going to use it in the bathroom, the glass jar could get slippery when wet. I think if we make it this year, I'll wrap the jars with hemp rope or some kind of pretty cloth ribbon to make it easier to grip. I might also try to find some wooden scoops to tie on as accessories.

Good luck!

Roxy

limewave
12-17-2010, 09:41 AM
Great ideas everyone! Such great feedback.

We always gave presents to our teachers growing up. In reflection, it was probably b/c both of my parents were teachers ;) As others have mentioned, my kids spend a lot of time with their teachers/daycare providers. And they are a big part of helping us raise and care for our children. It's great to let them know we appreciate them.

One year I did a big gift box with several $5 gc to starbucks, burt's bees products, and homemade goodies. This was for the daycare workers, there were 7-8 different employees.

Last year I asked the daycare what they'd like and they asked for a GC to a Hage's--which is a school supply/book store. I also wrote a personal note that they loved so much, they framed it and it hangs by the entryway :)

kacie tri-ing
12-17-2010, 01:36 PM
I just got home from my last day teaching before the break and read this.

I always gave my teachers gifts (and my parents are also teachers). It is in NO way about what the gift actually is. The kids are SO thrilled to hand you something and tell you to enjoy the cookie-chocolate-gift-card-ornament. And to be perfectly honest, I do. I work really really hard, and it is awesome to be able to go have a latte as a treat with my husband and not spend a dime. Because a gift card to a coffee shop is like taking me out, but I get to choose when and where. I am really careful about my nutrition, but I can't WAIT to try the traditional recipies for cookies/candy/chocolates that my kids have made that I don't make. And you know what, it also lets me off the hook for holiday gatherings. I don't have the time to make things, but I can bring an assortment of treats to a party, and it is always a hit! I really do think about my kids when I am enjoying the gifts. They are special to me, just like they are special when they are given.

Of course, every teacher loves a card. That is a given. I love gift cards. Even $5 card to starbucks with a pack of biscotti is awesome. It says, "go read a book and relax during the bread. You earned it." To be perfectly honest, we do earn it :p

I love hearing that the kids made the goodies too. Makes it special. Also nice when they are from a rockin' local bakery that you KNOW is going to be good :-)

I also got some cool stainless steel water bottles (I do work at an environmentally focused school).

We don't keep score. We do like to be appreciated. If you don't give your teachers gifts, drop them an email and say thank you. I promise that the feeling of appreciation is SO important to us. It makes us get up in the morning and work harder to know that people understand that we ARE working hard!

And I TOTALLY agree with V. We do not have "office" relationships with children. If you are a teacher for the right reasons, you love the kids....I mean really love them. It is not the same at all as working with adults.

Owlie
12-17-2010, 02:02 PM
We got our teachers gifts up until middle school. Nothing huge. Barnes and Noble gift cards ($10-15) and chocolate, unless we thought up a more suitable gift. I remember giving a glass poison dart frog ornament to my third grade teacher (her room was full of froggy things). I baked cookies for all the teachers who wrote my college recommendation letters as well.

TxDoc
12-17-2010, 05:45 PM
I just don't think it should be the norm to give teachers presents. Same for office gift-giving. It just doesn't seem right to me because it's like gift giving out of obligation or pressure, and that's pretty much contrary to the notion of giving gifts in the first place. That's not something that I would want to teach a kid.

Yes, I agree with you. I think a gift should be heartfelt and never come out of obligation. The way I see gifting, I usually associate it with gratitude. In fact the few gifts I give on the workplace are to people that I consider truly special and I am very grateful to have as collaborators and friends.

That said, I do recall that one resident once gave me a present (I teach med students and residents). It was after graduation, prior to leaving for another hospital. A coffee mug with a prayer for teachers - I still keep it on my desk, use it everyday for coffee, and think it was a nice and unexpected gesture. I think I recall it because it was a rare instance, and sort of came out of nowhere.

If gifting became the norm, I guess it would lose its spontaneity and meaning.

channlluv
12-18-2010, 08:13 AM
I don't think giving teachers gifts is an obligation at all. (If I were keeping score, I'd be disappointed -- 340 students and only ten or so gifts? Come on, whose slacking here?) But it is appreciated, being appreciated for the work we do. And I agree with Kacie and V, the relationships I have with the kids are not at all "office." I just love being around them and hearing them laugh at all the right places when I'm doing read-alouds in funny voices. Such an ego boost! It's purely selfish on my part.

:)

Roxy

shootingstar
12-18-2010, 08:18 AM
At least a Christmas card with some heartfelt words from student/parents, would be thoughtful.

I went to school in the 1960's: gifts for teachers from students were extremely rare.

channlluv
12-18-2010, 08:32 AM
You know, it might just be the different school environments, too. Every classroom in our school starts every day with appreciations from student to student in what they call Morning Meeting. Teachers reinforce good behavior with vocal appreciations of kids doing the right thing. (I do it in the library, too: "I really appreciate Kara and Michael for sitting down so quickly and quietly in the Story Circle. Thank you, Casey and Alana and Carrie for joining them." Sounds cheesy, I know, but it works.)

We have a big schoolwide Gratitude Celebration at Thanksgiving. We start every faculty meeting with appreciations, too, teacher to teacher. Even our parent council starts their meetings with appreciations. And by that, I mean each person in the circle is invited (not obligated) to share something nice that they noticed someone else doing since they met last, and it can be big or small, but it lets people know that their kindnesses are noticed. It also feels good to be the person calling attention to someone else's good work.

Gifts attached to those messages of appreciation are just tangible recognition of a job well done or someone going out of their way to be kind or helpful.

Not at all an obligation, but very much appreciated.

Now, gifts for family...those often feel like an obligation to me. What is it about sharing a gene pool with someone that seems to make cattiness and sniping okay?

Roxy

Blueberry
12-18-2010, 08:38 AM
Now, gifts for family...those often feel like an obligation to me. What is it about sharing a gene pool with someone that seems to make cattiness and sniping okay?

This. This is why I dread the holidays most years.

My mom, for example, insisted on giving presents this year (despite my suggestion that we should all just get together). She sent me a list. I haven't been paid since October. Ummm.....not gonna be buying lots of those "demands" this year.

Tri Girl
12-18-2010, 10:59 AM
I love hearing that the kids made the goodies too. Makes it special. Also nice when they are from a rockin' local bakery that you KNOW is going to be good :-)


We don't keep score. We do like to be appreciated. If you don't give your teachers gifts, drop them an email and say thank you. I promise that the feeling of appreciation is SO important to us. It makes us get up in the morning and work harder to know that people understand that we ARE working hard!

And I TOTALLY agree with V. We do not have "office" relationships with children. If you are a teacher for the right reasons, you love the kids....I mean really love them. It is not the same at all as working with adults.

+1

I'm an elementary/middle school librarian and teach 425 kids. I got about a dozen gifts (including one from all the Jr. High parents). Some very cool things (gift cards, pretty scarves, ornaments, cookies, hand drawn pictures, one little plastic baggie with 4 m&m's in it). I loved it ALL!!!!
I did put all the food gifts in the teacher's lounge to share since I'm on WW and trying really hard to lose some weight (I can't eat just one bite, or I'd eat it all). It truly is the thought that counts. :)

Our parents know we don't expect gifts. I would much rather have e-mails of thanks or cards from the kids or parents than actual gifts. I work hard to interact and teach all those kids and just a note of encouragement/appreciation would make my day! I teach in an upper middle class school so our parents are more able to give than when I taught in a lower socioeconomic school (but even then, kids would give me the sweetest gifts like drawings, etc).

None of us expect it, but we all appreciate the sentiment when it's given. I'd do this job for 25% less (if you can believe that) because I truly love what I do!!

malkin
12-18-2010, 01:14 PM
...I think a gift should be heartfelt and never come out of obligation...
If gifting became the norm, I guess it would lose its spontaneity and meaning.

Exactly.

azfiddle
12-18-2010, 02:23 PM
I'm a middle school science teacher. Our parents and students are generous, and I received many gifts this year. Lots of home baked goodies and chocolate, some jars of lotion, candles, a light-up ornament necklace, a few Christmas and red apple/teacher knick knacks and some gift cards.

I appreciate each and every gift and offer warm thanks and often a hug when the kids bring them, because they are still learning those social skills and need every possible bit of reinforcement. But since the question was what gift ideas to get for a teacher-

Gift cards to book stores, education supply stores or office supply stores are really useful. Starbucks is nice too. If you know enough about the teacher, making a donation in his/her name to a favorite non-profit would make me feel really great. Or ask the teacher if there is something they could really use in the classroom, but can't afford - many school districts are really in bad shape right now and money is really tight for supplies. You could go in together with several parents for a gift card or to purchase something.

From my point of view- you could skip any of the little knick knacks and holiday or teacher paraphanalia


Hope that's helpful.

Bike Writer
12-18-2010, 05:50 PM
This may be coming late since some schools are out now, but any out-of-the-ordinary appreciation is very heartwarming to receive because it isn't expected. I grew up in the 60's and no one ever gave gifts, times change.

I teach Sunday School which is very different than "school," the first time I received a gift I was very surprised. Some parents give gifts and others do not but none are expected or anticipated. I think the Starbucks or movie passes are really a nice treat and make me feel extra special.

I still have a drawing one of the kids gave me on my refrigerator right this moment and it is precious because it was spontaneous. Notes of appreciation are the very best and more than enough reward, but if a parent really feels motivated to give it will be appreciated whatever it is.