Dianyla
07-11-2005, 10:57 PM
Thought I'd share with you guys my adventure story from last weekend's STP. I had been training to do it in two days until about a month ago when some business travel got scheduled that required me to be on a plane on Sunday morning so I had to switch to doing it in 1 day instead. Hopefully my training partner yogaangel (http://forums.teamestrogen.com/member.php?u=1397) will pop in here too and tell her story, her ride was a lot more exciting than mine!
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STP-2: Thursday
So my only job for today is go to the office, act productive for a respectable amount of time, leave early, and get everything packed and ready in order to leave for Seattle on Friday morning and also be packed to leave Sunday morning on a business trip. I haven't even figured out which bike clothes to wear and what is really going to happen with the weather. I've been stalking the forecast all week and the pattern has been a little stormlet coming through every few days with a 1-2 day window of dry weather in between. Rain is still a very strong possibility but so far everything indicates that the temperature will be mild in the low 70s (thank god!). I get all my work stuff wrapped up, which takes longer than hoped because I had to do all my final travel arrangements for the trip next week (yeah, better get that hotel booked already), set up my out of office stuff, and get all my itinerary things printed out. Finally run out the door at 6:30 and high-tail it over to the local bike shop.
Yogaangel had already proxy-shopped at REI for me via cellphone, describing to me which rain booties they had and none of them sounded right to me so I decided to go to the Bike Gallery instead. Besides, even when on a short schedule I'm always interested in seeing what gear variety might be had at another retailer. Because I'm a gear *****. I get there 15 minutes before they close and make a beeline for the clothes area. Within seconds I have totally scored. Not that I need them this time of year, but I find the coveted wool Ibex knee-warmers in my size for $15 on the clearance rack. Then, not one, but two! Smartwool longsleeve zip underlayers, women's size medium for 50% off. Which is still embarrassingly expensive even at half-off so I won't list the price here. Call yogaangel and inform her that I found the base layer she's been looking for and agree to pick it up for her. Then I start evaluating the bootie situation and quickly realize that I can't realistically try on booties without my shoes. Fortunately they sell my shoe at this store so I enlist the help of a CBSG (cute bike store guy) to fetch me a pair in my size so that I can try on booties. Most of the booties are made for weenie road shoes that don't have tread, and most of the ones I tried either didn't fit over the treads or they were so tight that I could feel them compressing my flipper-feet. And then I see this one pair just flopped onto the ground apart from the others, the only one of it's kind in the pile. Picking it up it has no price tag and is a size XL, they look huge. I think to myself "Huge... yeah... sounds about the right size" and try one on, and it fits perfectly! Most importantly it's waterproof outside and fleecy inside, and it has these goofy little yellow fabric panels at the tip of the toe and the heel for visibility. It has no price tag (that means it's free, right?) so I have the CBSG check on it and it's $25. On impulse I pick up another spare inner tube and a few handfuls of Gu and in 15 minutes total shopping time I have cleared the building.
Oh, and I forgot the part where a second CBSG shows up to tell the first CBSG that he is leaving early. I looked up from my footwear-trying-on-task and just blurted out "oh you might want to zip your fly up before you leave". Did I mention I get a mild case of true-ette's syndrome when I'm stressed? :)
Next stop: Trader Joe's to buy Larabars and sundry vittles. I wolf down the doggy-bag of Thai food from lunch in my car in the parking lot because I'm about to fall over. Next stop: Birdbath & Beyond to find a birthday present with my brother. Why now? Oh, yeah. Because his birthday was only a month ago and I'm a bad sister and haven't gotten him one yet, and anyways I need to get one now because we're staying at his house tomorrow night. Fortunately my shopping karma is strong today and within 15 minutes I have located and acquired a very appropriate gift that's exactly in the price/quality range that I was looking for. Last stop: my local Albertson's to pick up more food and get one last eyeful of Hot Stockboy before I leave. Oh, and during this entire shopping expedition I think I made/received no less than 6 cellphone calls from yogaangel, some of them involving blond moments and awol sleeping bag stuffsacks, but that's really her story to tell... :p
OK, so we're still on STP-2 and it's 10pm and I've finally arrived home with all of my various foraged items. I need to prepare some foodstuffs, pack for the STP, pack for Chicago, and at a bare minimum lube my chain. Shouldn't take that long, right? So, um, yeah. I realize that I need clean clothes for next week so I put a load of laundry on. Also realize that I am already 1 day late on one utility bill and have about 5 more due next week, and I have about 3 weeks of unopened mail piled on the kitchen counter because god only knows what other things lurk in that pile. And I'm bummed because my cool blue sleeveless Biker Chick jersey didn't get shipped until yesterday Wednesday (when I'd ordered it last week, grrrr!). Oh, and I'm also in the habit of compulsively straightening my house up every time I go travelling so that when I come home I'll have clean towels in the bathroom, clean sheets in the bed, and things are soothing and peaceful state to arrive home to. So anyway, loooong story short I just kinda didn't quite make it to bed that night. :eek: I could have done the bare minimum that I had to get done and gotten maybe 5 hours but I was so wired I'm not sure that I could have slept if I tried and at some point my bizarre logic was that I'd be so tired then I would be guaranteed to sleep the night before the event in spite of nerves.
STP-1: Friday
The Mom-Mobile arrives at 8:30 am and I'm almost ready. She's cranky and I can tell her blood sugar is down so I toss a chipotle chicken sandwich in her direction. Besides keeping her quiet for 10 minutes it markedly improves her mood. Cram my bike and bags in the back of her mini-suv and we head over to pick up my training partner. Cram her bike and bags in and hit Starbucks and we are on the road. Mom had me drive and it was quite rainy in several stretches on the way to Seattle which makes I-5 turn into an almost white out with the rain and waterspray being kicked up by trucks. Sphincter factor: 6.5. Not to mention the dread factor of thinking "weather, please don't be like this tomorrow!" Once in Seattle we visited the Mother Ship Gear Palace to just ogle the fancy stuff and possibly find a larger handlebar map holder but the bike section was picked pretty clean. Yogaangel found her dream socks; it's easy to find wool and it's easy to find pink, but rarely together. She's got a thing about pink, to say the least. Upon leaving REI we suddenly realized just why there was such an awesome parking space available right next to the store (wow can you believe our luck?) seeing that our car had gotten a little visit from the Ticket Fairy. Sigh. From there we headed to my brother's house and vegged for a while, watched some of the Tour de France and ate a big pasta meal. One very last gear run to his local bike shop (which was open 24 hrs the eve of STP) just to see if there's really any last item we might possibly need. Incredibly, I left empty handed! :rolleyes: The rain had stopped by then and the final as-close-as-it's-gonna-get weather forecast was finally available for tomorrow: Partly Cloudy!!! This made the final evening's packing much easier, though I still couldn't bear to part with all of my rain gear, if only because I'm sure it would have rained if I hadn't brought it. I decided to fit everything I needed in my camelback and not carry the trunk bag like I normally would. Got everything packed and sorted into my camelback bag to take and the one bag to put on the luggage truck. Stretched the legs out a little bit and we were in bed by 10:30 pm and I dropped off almost immediately.
My final gear list:
Worn: bike shorts, fleecy tights, socks, shoes, bra, longsleeve light wool layer, light jacket, gloves, pantyhose on head, helmet
Carried: sunglasses, wallet, cellphone, keys, light rain jacket, rain booties, inner tube, very basic toolset, tiny first aid kit, sunscreen, chamois butter mini-packets, vagicaine
Food: 2 nutella croissants, 4 nutella-cookie bombs, large bag pretzels, 2 Larabars, 1 chipotle sandwich, 10 packets Gu, 1 extra packet cytomax, 3 L water, 1 L prepared cytomax
STP:
4am arrived so very painfully early. I really would have liked to redo my fuzzy braid but there wasn't time so I just stashed it in the pantyhose-do and noone would know the difference anyway. Brushed teeth, slathered shorts in butt butter, dressed, and we were out the door. Put my camelback on backwards with the pack in front of me, and my big backpack on my back, and with this big pregobelly I had to bring my knees out wide at the top of each stroke. Now I can see why most women stop riding at about 7-8 months - I had to ride very gently so as to not tweak my knees on the short 2 miles down to the start line. I also realized during the ride to the start that my headlight's battery was fading, so I just took it off my bike and put it in the bag that I put on the truck. Bright idea #127.
We dropped our bags off and rearranged ourselves and took a quick picture, my brother went to find his riding partner, and then my yogaangel and I departed at exactly 5am. They were controlling the release of riders so that we all started in waves. I had read accounts online describing the first 20 miles as elbow-to-elbow mayhem but the way they throttled everyone it was very reasonable, busy but not overcrowded. As expected, I lost sight of yogaangel pretty early, most likely at the first downhill since she doesn't like to go downhill as fast. She was doing it in 2-days and staying in Centralia, so it was inevitable that we would separate at some point in the ride. Seattle police and event coordinators were at nearly every intersection directing traffic, which made a big difference. I had finished my two croissants on the way to the start and within the first 5 miles and also slurped two packets of Gu before reaching the REI rest stop in Kent. My feet were both a little bit numb and I'm pretty sure this was just due to temperature, not pressure or fit issues. I made good time to the REI stop (mile 24), a little over an hour. Ate a banana and a small handful of pretzels and was still feeling good so I got back on my bike within 5 minutes.
Back on the road I rode in a few mini-pelotons which were a blast, very easy to move at a good pace in a pack like that. Lots of very nice toned thighs and calves to look at, too. :) I was breezing along when I heard a voice on my left calling out "Hey Gorgeous!" I got twitterpated for all of 1 second until I realized it was just my brother and his riding buddy. Sigh. They blew on by with a group that was going fairly quick. Passing through Sumner there was an entire block of wet muddy gravel, and this was the only time when I was actually happy to be on a mountain bike. I knew that The Hill was coming soon so I ate 2 more packs of Gu. Geared down a little bit early since I didn't want to drop the chain and just tractored right up the hill at my usual 5mph. It wasn't nearly as awful as everyone made it sound. Then again, it is good to have a mountain bike with granny gears. As soon as I got to the top I could see it flattened out so I rested on the bike, just taking it easy until I caught my breath. I felt pretty decent and was making reasonable time until the Spanaway rest stop (mile 53) around 9am. Although when I got off the bike I suddenly realized how woozy I was getting. Strange, you don't really feel it when you're riding but get off and try to walk in a straight line and only then do you realize you are bonking. Headed to the food line and found some boiled potatoes which were really good, and picked up a peanut butter and jelly sandwich that was made with the driest chewiest whole wheat bread I've ever eaten, it may have contained sawdust but I'm not sure. Managed to choke it down with lots of water. I also took the first pit stop, and when all I got was a little dribble and some rabbit pellets, I realized that after 4 hours on the bike I was way behind on water consumption. I also reapplied butt butter to the rear edge of my chamois pad which had started bothering me. I sat down to rest a little, took off my tights, and put sunscreen on. My head was starting to hurt, and I switched to sunglasses. After about 15 minutes I felt better and headed out again. :cool:
Munched on a Clif bar soon afterwards to try and keep ahead of hunger, and marveled to think at how Luna can possibly be owned by Clif. How is it that Peppermint Chocolate Luna bars are so damn tasty and Clif Mint Chocolate bars are so craptastic? At this point the crowds were thinned out quite a bit but there were still plenty of riders ahead and behind. There were no more large peloton groups, just little 3-5 person lines here and there and most of them seemed to be riding buddies. I came across a group of three grrls, 2 on a tandem and one solo, all wearing jerseys that said Alaska and had pretty cool wolf-howling-at-moon artwork. We all seemed to be going the same pace so I drafted with them for a while with their gracious permission. After about 10 miles I realized I had gone into a trance while staring in morbid fascination at their (rather hairy) legs so I peeled off at the Mill Pond rest stop at mile 72. After a lovely break involving a real sit-down toilet in a real restroom, I sat down to eat a Larabar and some pretzels and right then my camelback went dry, how fortuitous. I filled it back up before leaving the rest stop. Since putting on sunglasses and making an effort to force more fluids my headache was subsiding, and I promised myself that I would finish my half-full bottle of cytomax before getting to Centralia. Since the temperature warmed up my feet were no longer numb.
A few more miles of rolling hills and I stopped at Tenino (mile 86) and ate two very tasty molasses cookies and drank a Mountain Dew. By this point I was starting to feel fatigued in my legs and sorta creaky, but I just kept onwards in spite of a light headwind and made it to Centralia (mile 100) at 1pm. My first official century, in 8 hours. Go me! Now rinse and repeat. Tons of cyclists were everywhere milling around. I rolled to a stop right in front of a massage tent like a thirsty man staggering into an oasis. Within 2 minutes of arriving I was flat on a massage table getting prodded. My neck and arms were also getting fairly sore at this point. I felt bad for the massage therapists, they must have massaged a lot of sweaty sticky stinky people that day. After that lovely 15 minute refresher I wandered over to the toilets, then checked out the food situation. There was a food tent that specified "1-Day Riders Only" but when I went over there it was really not very inspiring. Maybe I just arrived there too late, but all I saw were just some boxes of orange wedges, fig newtons, and rice krispy treats. I grabbed a half-banana and a Rice Krispy treat and saved it for later, and walked back to the food vendor area where I bought a full plate of spaghetti to eat. That really hit the spot. I rested a few more minutes waiting for it to digest at least a little bit, mixed my second bottle of cytomax, and then hit the bathrooms again and was back on the bike around 1:45pm.
The next part of the ride was fairly quiet, people were a lot more spaced out and there just weren't that many of them. I was feeling ok but definitely starting to lag at a slower pace, at first 14-15 mph and then later a more pathetic 12-13. Starting to feel more and more saddle discomfort as well, especially up front. :bigeyes: I stopped at a gas station in Napavine (mile 110), knowing that some hills were coming up. Hit the restroom and inspected the situation. All I'm gonna say is that the little man in the boat appeared to have jumped ship and it looked for all the world like a hot dog bun down there what with all the swelling. I slapped on some vagicaine which started giving relief almost immediately, albeit a strangely numb "the coochie has left the building" sort of relief. :eek: I was definitely staying well hydrated at this point in the ride as I wanted a restroom about once an hour. Bought a 6 pack of oreos and scarfed half of the pack, and then didn't know where to stick the rest. My bento box was crammed full with a few emergency gu packets and the rice krispie treat. I didn't want to stick it into my backpack and then not have it handy. I looked down and realized that the gap in my cleavage was like a perfect pocket, the way my outer layer jacket was zipped up to just under the boobs which pulled my underlayer in snugly to form the base of the pocket. I was also thinking how someone so totally needs to invent a women's sportsbra that specifically has a pocket built in. It would probably only work for C-D and larger cups, and it would separate the boobs on the inside but have a smooth shelf-like appearance on the outside, and that would form a triangular pocket conveniently right there. Aw hell, maybe I just need a strap-on feed bag.
Headed out and was soon riding up the large-ish hill, just tractoring slowly. Passed a guy on the way up :) who was pushing really high gears and looked like he was about to puke. He complained about not having any lower gears, and I took a look at his rear derailleur and said "actually you do have one ring left". Happy surprise for him... funny how sometimes we're just too busy with our heads down to think clearly. After the crest of the hill I met the famed Banana Bread Lady! Free banana bread, which I was more than happy to donate for. Really good banana bread, too, it had this crystallized sugary glaze on top that may or may not have contained crack cocaine. A little further down the road was another home-based cookie stop, where I bought a peanut butter cookie. The young girl running the stop had hip-length twin braids. I smiled at her and said "Hey, I used to have hair like that!" and she said "oh really, what happened to it?" I said "Oh, I forgot to cut it and now it's down to there!" pointing down at my calf. I'm not sure she believed me though, especially since I had looped my covered braid into the top of my camelback so that it wouldn't pull on my neck, and it was pretty much invisible to her. She probably thought I was just some weirdo biker alien from outer space that was trying to pull her leg. Anyway.
Moving on I made it to Winlock (mile 120) and was rather disappointed by the World's Largest Egg. I guess if it's a real egg it is truly impressive, but I had been expecting something on a more massive and kitchy scale a la The World's Biggest Ball of Twine. I hadn't planned to stop but my cellphone had rung a few minutes earlier and when I saw a nice bench I decided to stop there and eat some pretzels for a while. It was 4:30 by this point and my brother had just crossed over the Longview Bridge 30 miles ahead of me and he was sounding pretty run down. (Comparing ride notes later revealed that he had a nasty crash at mile 70 and really took it hard on the knee, and the large quantities of Vitamin I he was taking as a result were tearing up his stomach and he was either bonking or puking the rest of the ride. But if Mom asks the official story is that his ride went just fine. Yes, just fine. :wacko: ) Leaving Winlock I kept going in crawl mode over more rolling hills that just kept going one after another. At some point I popped another packet of goo and ate the rice krispie treat. An Asian man with very nice calves and I leapfrogged over eachother a few times. The last time he tried to pass me he was pedalling furiously and just as he called out "On your left" he shifted and dropped his chain. I just chuckled and said "aw, I hate it when that happens" and kept plodding, he seemed rather mortified by the incident. Stopped again at Castle Rock (mile 137) sometime after 6pm. Bought a large cinnamon twist donut and a soft PB&J made with wonderfully junky white bread and those went down so nice and easy. While sitting on the school lawn a friendly golden retriever came over and decided to adopt me for a while and flopped his head down on my leg. Eventually I had to convince him to let me leave so I could keep riding, and hit the road again at about 6:30pm.
Heading out I was still moving slowly but not feeling that bad, just tired and sluggish. Passing through Kelso at around 7:10pm I took a quick call from my mom and told her where I was, she was waiting at the finish line for my brother. Then I proceeded over some really rough roads to reach The Bridge. I'd heard so many icky things about the Longview bridge that I was apprehensive, but when I finally arrived it was almost a letdown. I'd heard that there was no shoulder and a narrow car lane and horrible crosswinds. I did feel a little wind and was pleased to note that it would be giving me a nice tailwind once I crossed over to Rainier. The bridge was full of debris but there was a normal-width bike lane and thankfully not much traffic at that time of night. Coming down the other side I was amused to see about a dozen water bottles laying on the side immediately after a rather stiff bump from an expansion joint on the bridge. I could hear my cellphone ringing again and I resisted the temptation to fling it over the side of the bridge. I stopped at a convenience store right on the other side just before Rainier (mile 154). I was really feeling pain in my legs at this point, nothing that felt like a bad injury but definitely feeling overused and abused. Took a pit stop and listened to a voicemail from my brother, he had just finished around 7:30pm. Saw a Hostess Apple Pie and inspected the label: 470 calories!! Huzzah! I remember eating these things like they were going out of style in 7th grade, damn no wonder I gained so much puppy weight back then. Bought that and another bag of Oreos, this time the mini-bites. Then my cellphone rang yet again, it was Mom. She had just met my brother at the finish line and knew that I was in Rainier, and then she started doing the math and realized I was at least 4 hours away and she started freaking out. She wanted to come pick me up, threatening that the sag wagon was going to close the course and aliens would abduct me as soon as it got dark. She just wouldn't give it a rest. Yes, I know I have a 6am flight tomorrow morning, but that doesn't help me ride any faster right now! After trying to reason with her finally I just said "listen, what I'm doing is hard enough, and you're not making it any easier." I suggested to her that if she was trying to be helpful she could pick up my bag from the truck before the finish line closes. Otherwise just leave me alone, pfffft! OK, I didn't say that last part, but I certainly thought it. Back on the road around 8:00pm.
Once on the Oregon side of the river my speed picked back up to a decent 15mph rate. Probably a combined effect of a nice tailwind, the apple pie, and the 'supportive' phone call from Mom. From here on back the road was familiar and comforting. I am so very glad that yogaangel and I trained so much on highway 30. My legs were really starting to feel in pain. I was seriously debating whether or not to I would be able to make it to Portland at this rate. On my left (problem child) knee the tendon below the patella hurt, as well as that big ol' tendon in the back of the knee (where the hamstring connects?), and the top of my IT band on my right leg were the worst, and then general screaming soreness from all muscles. I forced myself to keep drinking water and ran out, and then worked on finishing my half-full bottle of cytomax. Around that time my legs started to feel less painful, most likely from the electrolytes in the Cytomax. For a while I could see a yellow-jacketed cyclist about a half-mile ahead of me, until s/he stopped at the Deer Island convenience store. I was considering stopping until I saw some kind of support vehicle pull over honking and I was afraid it was the Sag Wagon coming to fetch me so I just kept going. Bring Out Your Dead! They'll have to catch me first! I made it to St. Helens (mile 178 ) at around 9:30pm and hit a gas station to buy some Powerade. Watched a really beautiful sunset as I tried to eat more nutella-cookie sandwich bombs but they were just too rich, so I ate more oreos instead. Eyeing my stash of goo I realized that I had about 5 packs left and I could start using these again to get back to Portland.
By this time it was dark and here I am with no headlight and a mere sliver of a crescent moon low in the sky. My blinkybutt light was flashing strong though, and I could always make out the white line and stay somewhere to the right of it when there were no cars. When a car would come up behind me I could use the light from it's headlights to visualize the distance ahead as far as I could and move further away from the white line. It was at this moment that I was so thankful that they finally swept the bike lane on Highway 30. As recently as a few weeks ago it was full of junk and debris and I surely would have gotten a flat tire in the dark being unable to navigate around the junk. Passed Scappoose (mile 185) at 10pm and kept on trucking, slurping down a several more packets of goo for the few hills I knew were coming up. By the time I got to Scappoose I realized I was close enough and alive enough that I would be able to get to Portland. But then I also realized that the Finish line was long closed. At that point I made my decision: I would reach the City Limits, but not ride the last 5 miles into downtown. I called the ManFriend and told him to meet me at the Shell station in Linnton in about 45 minutes. Shortly after Scappoose I saw a mini-stop on the side of the road with a bunch of tents next to it, I gathered that the volunteers staffing it just decided to camp overnight to be available to help the slowpokes like me and be ready bright and early for the next day riders. In the pitch black they must have seen my blinky red light because out of the darkness I heard a whoop of encouragement. I choked up and barely managed to squeak out a response yelp, and had to quickly shove the lump in my throat back down to keep from getting an asthma attack. Further on ahead I saw some blinking ahead in the distance and it slowly got closer and closer. I passed a group of 4 who were dogging up the hill and we all just whooped at eachother in encouragement. Well, either that or I just scared the holy crap out of them by sneaking up behind them in the dark with no headlight, not sure which. :p
At 10:45 I reached the Portland City Limits sign (mile 193), and about a mile later I was in Linnton, very carefully stepping off my bike and clutching the tailgate of the truck trying not to fall over. What amazes me to no end is how I can be so tired and shakey that I can barely walk or get into the truck and yet be capable of hauling *** on a bike in that condition. Strange, indeed. The last 40 miles I kept envisioning the scene in the second Black Stallion movie where he's riding the horse around the track and just glued onto the horse, hands frozen around the reins which they had to cut off in order to get him off the horse. In a way I envy the wonderful camraderie of a community ride and arriving at the finish line in celebration the way my friends did, but instead it was just a very quiet and very solitary journey the last 100 miles.
This is the way my STP ends, not with a bang but a whimper.
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STP-2: Thursday
So my only job for today is go to the office, act productive for a respectable amount of time, leave early, and get everything packed and ready in order to leave for Seattle on Friday morning and also be packed to leave Sunday morning on a business trip. I haven't even figured out which bike clothes to wear and what is really going to happen with the weather. I've been stalking the forecast all week and the pattern has been a little stormlet coming through every few days with a 1-2 day window of dry weather in between. Rain is still a very strong possibility but so far everything indicates that the temperature will be mild in the low 70s (thank god!). I get all my work stuff wrapped up, which takes longer than hoped because I had to do all my final travel arrangements for the trip next week (yeah, better get that hotel booked already), set up my out of office stuff, and get all my itinerary things printed out. Finally run out the door at 6:30 and high-tail it over to the local bike shop.
Yogaangel had already proxy-shopped at REI for me via cellphone, describing to me which rain booties they had and none of them sounded right to me so I decided to go to the Bike Gallery instead. Besides, even when on a short schedule I'm always interested in seeing what gear variety might be had at another retailer. Because I'm a gear *****. I get there 15 minutes before they close and make a beeline for the clothes area. Within seconds I have totally scored. Not that I need them this time of year, but I find the coveted wool Ibex knee-warmers in my size for $15 on the clearance rack. Then, not one, but two! Smartwool longsleeve zip underlayers, women's size medium for 50% off. Which is still embarrassingly expensive even at half-off so I won't list the price here. Call yogaangel and inform her that I found the base layer she's been looking for and agree to pick it up for her. Then I start evaluating the bootie situation and quickly realize that I can't realistically try on booties without my shoes. Fortunately they sell my shoe at this store so I enlist the help of a CBSG (cute bike store guy) to fetch me a pair in my size so that I can try on booties. Most of the booties are made for weenie road shoes that don't have tread, and most of the ones I tried either didn't fit over the treads or they were so tight that I could feel them compressing my flipper-feet. And then I see this one pair just flopped onto the ground apart from the others, the only one of it's kind in the pile. Picking it up it has no price tag and is a size XL, they look huge. I think to myself "Huge... yeah... sounds about the right size" and try one on, and it fits perfectly! Most importantly it's waterproof outside and fleecy inside, and it has these goofy little yellow fabric panels at the tip of the toe and the heel for visibility. It has no price tag (that means it's free, right?) so I have the CBSG check on it and it's $25. On impulse I pick up another spare inner tube and a few handfuls of Gu and in 15 minutes total shopping time I have cleared the building.
Oh, and I forgot the part where a second CBSG shows up to tell the first CBSG that he is leaving early. I looked up from my footwear-trying-on-task and just blurted out "oh you might want to zip your fly up before you leave". Did I mention I get a mild case of true-ette's syndrome when I'm stressed? :)
Next stop: Trader Joe's to buy Larabars and sundry vittles. I wolf down the doggy-bag of Thai food from lunch in my car in the parking lot because I'm about to fall over. Next stop: Birdbath & Beyond to find a birthday present with my brother. Why now? Oh, yeah. Because his birthday was only a month ago and I'm a bad sister and haven't gotten him one yet, and anyways I need to get one now because we're staying at his house tomorrow night. Fortunately my shopping karma is strong today and within 15 minutes I have located and acquired a very appropriate gift that's exactly in the price/quality range that I was looking for. Last stop: my local Albertson's to pick up more food and get one last eyeful of Hot Stockboy before I leave. Oh, and during this entire shopping expedition I think I made/received no less than 6 cellphone calls from yogaangel, some of them involving blond moments and awol sleeping bag stuffsacks, but that's really her story to tell... :p
OK, so we're still on STP-2 and it's 10pm and I've finally arrived home with all of my various foraged items. I need to prepare some foodstuffs, pack for the STP, pack for Chicago, and at a bare minimum lube my chain. Shouldn't take that long, right? So, um, yeah. I realize that I need clean clothes for next week so I put a load of laundry on. Also realize that I am already 1 day late on one utility bill and have about 5 more due next week, and I have about 3 weeks of unopened mail piled on the kitchen counter because god only knows what other things lurk in that pile. And I'm bummed because my cool blue sleeveless Biker Chick jersey didn't get shipped until yesterday Wednesday (when I'd ordered it last week, grrrr!). Oh, and I'm also in the habit of compulsively straightening my house up every time I go travelling so that when I come home I'll have clean towels in the bathroom, clean sheets in the bed, and things are soothing and peaceful state to arrive home to. So anyway, loooong story short I just kinda didn't quite make it to bed that night. :eek: I could have done the bare minimum that I had to get done and gotten maybe 5 hours but I was so wired I'm not sure that I could have slept if I tried and at some point my bizarre logic was that I'd be so tired then I would be guaranteed to sleep the night before the event in spite of nerves.
STP-1: Friday
The Mom-Mobile arrives at 8:30 am and I'm almost ready. She's cranky and I can tell her blood sugar is down so I toss a chipotle chicken sandwich in her direction. Besides keeping her quiet for 10 minutes it markedly improves her mood. Cram my bike and bags in the back of her mini-suv and we head over to pick up my training partner. Cram her bike and bags in and hit Starbucks and we are on the road. Mom had me drive and it was quite rainy in several stretches on the way to Seattle which makes I-5 turn into an almost white out with the rain and waterspray being kicked up by trucks. Sphincter factor: 6.5. Not to mention the dread factor of thinking "weather, please don't be like this tomorrow!" Once in Seattle we visited the Mother Ship Gear Palace to just ogle the fancy stuff and possibly find a larger handlebar map holder but the bike section was picked pretty clean. Yogaangel found her dream socks; it's easy to find wool and it's easy to find pink, but rarely together. She's got a thing about pink, to say the least. Upon leaving REI we suddenly realized just why there was such an awesome parking space available right next to the store (wow can you believe our luck?) seeing that our car had gotten a little visit from the Ticket Fairy. Sigh. From there we headed to my brother's house and vegged for a while, watched some of the Tour de France and ate a big pasta meal. One very last gear run to his local bike shop (which was open 24 hrs the eve of STP) just to see if there's really any last item we might possibly need. Incredibly, I left empty handed! :rolleyes: The rain had stopped by then and the final as-close-as-it's-gonna-get weather forecast was finally available for tomorrow: Partly Cloudy!!! This made the final evening's packing much easier, though I still couldn't bear to part with all of my rain gear, if only because I'm sure it would have rained if I hadn't brought it. I decided to fit everything I needed in my camelback and not carry the trunk bag like I normally would. Got everything packed and sorted into my camelback bag to take and the one bag to put on the luggage truck. Stretched the legs out a little bit and we were in bed by 10:30 pm and I dropped off almost immediately.
My final gear list:
Worn: bike shorts, fleecy tights, socks, shoes, bra, longsleeve light wool layer, light jacket, gloves, pantyhose on head, helmet
Carried: sunglasses, wallet, cellphone, keys, light rain jacket, rain booties, inner tube, very basic toolset, tiny first aid kit, sunscreen, chamois butter mini-packets, vagicaine
Food: 2 nutella croissants, 4 nutella-cookie bombs, large bag pretzels, 2 Larabars, 1 chipotle sandwich, 10 packets Gu, 1 extra packet cytomax, 3 L water, 1 L prepared cytomax
STP:
4am arrived so very painfully early. I really would have liked to redo my fuzzy braid but there wasn't time so I just stashed it in the pantyhose-do and noone would know the difference anyway. Brushed teeth, slathered shorts in butt butter, dressed, and we were out the door. Put my camelback on backwards with the pack in front of me, and my big backpack on my back, and with this big pregobelly I had to bring my knees out wide at the top of each stroke. Now I can see why most women stop riding at about 7-8 months - I had to ride very gently so as to not tweak my knees on the short 2 miles down to the start line. I also realized during the ride to the start that my headlight's battery was fading, so I just took it off my bike and put it in the bag that I put on the truck. Bright idea #127.
We dropped our bags off and rearranged ourselves and took a quick picture, my brother went to find his riding partner, and then my yogaangel and I departed at exactly 5am. They were controlling the release of riders so that we all started in waves. I had read accounts online describing the first 20 miles as elbow-to-elbow mayhem but the way they throttled everyone it was very reasonable, busy but not overcrowded. As expected, I lost sight of yogaangel pretty early, most likely at the first downhill since she doesn't like to go downhill as fast. She was doing it in 2-days and staying in Centralia, so it was inevitable that we would separate at some point in the ride. Seattle police and event coordinators were at nearly every intersection directing traffic, which made a big difference. I had finished my two croissants on the way to the start and within the first 5 miles and also slurped two packets of Gu before reaching the REI rest stop in Kent. My feet were both a little bit numb and I'm pretty sure this was just due to temperature, not pressure or fit issues. I made good time to the REI stop (mile 24), a little over an hour. Ate a banana and a small handful of pretzels and was still feeling good so I got back on my bike within 5 minutes.
Back on the road I rode in a few mini-pelotons which were a blast, very easy to move at a good pace in a pack like that. Lots of very nice toned thighs and calves to look at, too. :) I was breezing along when I heard a voice on my left calling out "Hey Gorgeous!" I got twitterpated for all of 1 second until I realized it was just my brother and his riding buddy. Sigh. They blew on by with a group that was going fairly quick. Passing through Sumner there was an entire block of wet muddy gravel, and this was the only time when I was actually happy to be on a mountain bike. I knew that The Hill was coming soon so I ate 2 more packs of Gu. Geared down a little bit early since I didn't want to drop the chain and just tractored right up the hill at my usual 5mph. It wasn't nearly as awful as everyone made it sound. Then again, it is good to have a mountain bike with granny gears. As soon as I got to the top I could see it flattened out so I rested on the bike, just taking it easy until I caught my breath. I felt pretty decent and was making reasonable time until the Spanaway rest stop (mile 53) around 9am. Although when I got off the bike I suddenly realized how woozy I was getting. Strange, you don't really feel it when you're riding but get off and try to walk in a straight line and only then do you realize you are bonking. Headed to the food line and found some boiled potatoes which were really good, and picked up a peanut butter and jelly sandwich that was made with the driest chewiest whole wheat bread I've ever eaten, it may have contained sawdust but I'm not sure. Managed to choke it down with lots of water. I also took the first pit stop, and when all I got was a little dribble and some rabbit pellets, I realized that after 4 hours on the bike I was way behind on water consumption. I also reapplied butt butter to the rear edge of my chamois pad which had started bothering me. I sat down to rest a little, took off my tights, and put sunscreen on. My head was starting to hurt, and I switched to sunglasses. After about 15 minutes I felt better and headed out again. :cool:
Munched on a Clif bar soon afterwards to try and keep ahead of hunger, and marveled to think at how Luna can possibly be owned by Clif. How is it that Peppermint Chocolate Luna bars are so damn tasty and Clif Mint Chocolate bars are so craptastic? At this point the crowds were thinned out quite a bit but there were still plenty of riders ahead and behind. There were no more large peloton groups, just little 3-5 person lines here and there and most of them seemed to be riding buddies. I came across a group of three grrls, 2 on a tandem and one solo, all wearing jerseys that said Alaska and had pretty cool wolf-howling-at-moon artwork. We all seemed to be going the same pace so I drafted with them for a while with their gracious permission. After about 10 miles I realized I had gone into a trance while staring in morbid fascination at their (rather hairy) legs so I peeled off at the Mill Pond rest stop at mile 72. After a lovely break involving a real sit-down toilet in a real restroom, I sat down to eat a Larabar and some pretzels and right then my camelback went dry, how fortuitous. I filled it back up before leaving the rest stop. Since putting on sunglasses and making an effort to force more fluids my headache was subsiding, and I promised myself that I would finish my half-full bottle of cytomax before getting to Centralia. Since the temperature warmed up my feet were no longer numb.
A few more miles of rolling hills and I stopped at Tenino (mile 86) and ate two very tasty molasses cookies and drank a Mountain Dew. By this point I was starting to feel fatigued in my legs and sorta creaky, but I just kept onwards in spite of a light headwind and made it to Centralia (mile 100) at 1pm. My first official century, in 8 hours. Go me! Now rinse and repeat. Tons of cyclists were everywhere milling around. I rolled to a stop right in front of a massage tent like a thirsty man staggering into an oasis. Within 2 minutes of arriving I was flat on a massage table getting prodded. My neck and arms were also getting fairly sore at this point. I felt bad for the massage therapists, they must have massaged a lot of sweaty sticky stinky people that day. After that lovely 15 minute refresher I wandered over to the toilets, then checked out the food situation. There was a food tent that specified "1-Day Riders Only" but when I went over there it was really not very inspiring. Maybe I just arrived there too late, but all I saw were just some boxes of orange wedges, fig newtons, and rice krispy treats. I grabbed a half-banana and a Rice Krispy treat and saved it for later, and walked back to the food vendor area where I bought a full plate of spaghetti to eat. That really hit the spot. I rested a few more minutes waiting for it to digest at least a little bit, mixed my second bottle of cytomax, and then hit the bathrooms again and was back on the bike around 1:45pm.
The next part of the ride was fairly quiet, people were a lot more spaced out and there just weren't that many of them. I was feeling ok but definitely starting to lag at a slower pace, at first 14-15 mph and then later a more pathetic 12-13. Starting to feel more and more saddle discomfort as well, especially up front. :bigeyes: I stopped at a gas station in Napavine (mile 110), knowing that some hills were coming up. Hit the restroom and inspected the situation. All I'm gonna say is that the little man in the boat appeared to have jumped ship and it looked for all the world like a hot dog bun down there what with all the swelling. I slapped on some vagicaine which started giving relief almost immediately, albeit a strangely numb "the coochie has left the building" sort of relief. :eek: I was definitely staying well hydrated at this point in the ride as I wanted a restroom about once an hour. Bought a 6 pack of oreos and scarfed half of the pack, and then didn't know where to stick the rest. My bento box was crammed full with a few emergency gu packets and the rice krispie treat. I didn't want to stick it into my backpack and then not have it handy. I looked down and realized that the gap in my cleavage was like a perfect pocket, the way my outer layer jacket was zipped up to just under the boobs which pulled my underlayer in snugly to form the base of the pocket. I was also thinking how someone so totally needs to invent a women's sportsbra that specifically has a pocket built in. It would probably only work for C-D and larger cups, and it would separate the boobs on the inside but have a smooth shelf-like appearance on the outside, and that would form a triangular pocket conveniently right there. Aw hell, maybe I just need a strap-on feed bag.
Headed out and was soon riding up the large-ish hill, just tractoring slowly. Passed a guy on the way up :) who was pushing really high gears and looked like he was about to puke. He complained about not having any lower gears, and I took a look at his rear derailleur and said "actually you do have one ring left". Happy surprise for him... funny how sometimes we're just too busy with our heads down to think clearly. After the crest of the hill I met the famed Banana Bread Lady! Free banana bread, which I was more than happy to donate for. Really good banana bread, too, it had this crystallized sugary glaze on top that may or may not have contained crack cocaine. A little further down the road was another home-based cookie stop, where I bought a peanut butter cookie. The young girl running the stop had hip-length twin braids. I smiled at her and said "Hey, I used to have hair like that!" and she said "oh really, what happened to it?" I said "Oh, I forgot to cut it and now it's down to there!" pointing down at my calf. I'm not sure she believed me though, especially since I had looped my covered braid into the top of my camelback so that it wouldn't pull on my neck, and it was pretty much invisible to her. She probably thought I was just some weirdo biker alien from outer space that was trying to pull her leg. Anyway.
Moving on I made it to Winlock (mile 120) and was rather disappointed by the World's Largest Egg. I guess if it's a real egg it is truly impressive, but I had been expecting something on a more massive and kitchy scale a la The World's Biggest Ball of Twine. I hadn't planned to stop but my cellphone had rung a few minutes earlier and when I saw a nice bench I decided to stop there and eat some pretzels for a while. It was 4:30 by this point and my brother had just crossed over the Longview Bridge 30 miles ahead of me and he was sounding pretty run down. (Comparing ride notes later revealed that he had a nasty crash at mile 70 and really took it hard on the knee, and the large quantities of Vitamin I he was taking as a result were tearing up his stomach and he was either bonking or puking the rest of the ride. But if Mom asks the official story is that his ride went just fine. Yes, just fine. :wacko: ) Leaving Winlock I kept going in crawl mode over more rolling hills that just kept going one after another. At some point I popped another packet of goo and ate the rice krispie treat. An Asian man with very nice calves and I leapfrogged over eachother a few times. The last time he tried to pass me he was pedalling furiously and just as he called out "On your left" he shifted and dropped his chain. I just chuckled and said "aw, I hate it when that happens" and kept plodding, he seemed rather mortified by the incident. Stopped again at Castle Rock (mile 137) sometime after 6pm. Bought a large cinnamon twist donut and a soft PB&J made with wonderfully junky white bread and those went down so nice and easy. While sitting on the school lawn a friendly golden retriever came over and decided to adopt me for a while and flopped his head down on my leg. Eventually I had to convince him to let me leave so I could keep riding, and hit the road again at about 6:30pm.
Heading out I was still moving slowly but not feeling that bad, just tired and sluggish. Passing through Kelso at around 7:10pm I took a quick call from my mom and told her where I was, she was waiting at the finish line for my brother. Then I proceeded over some really rough roads to reach The Bridge. I'd heard so many icky things about the Longview bridge that I was apprehensive, but when I finally arrived it was almost a letdown. I'd heard that there was no shoulder and a narrow car lane and horrible crosswinds. I did feel a little wind and was pleased to note that it would be giving me a nice tailwind once I crossed over to Rainier. The bridge was full of debris but there was a normal-width bike lane and thankfully not much traffic at that time of night. Coming down the other side I was amused to see about a dozen water bottles laying on the side immediately after a rather stiff bump from an expansion joint on the bridge. I could hear my cellphone ringing again and I resisted the temptation to fling it over the side of the bridge. I stopped at a convenience store right on the other side just before Rainier (mile 154). I was really feeling pain in my legs at this point, nothing that felt like a bad injury but definitely feeling overused and abused. Took a pit stop and listened to a voicemail from my brother, he had just finished around 7:30pm. Saw a Hostess Apple Pie and inspected the label: 470 calories!! Huzzah! I remember eating these things like they were going out of style in 7th grade, damn no wonder I gained so much puppy weight back then. Bought that and another bag of Oreos, this time the mini-bites. Then my cellphone rang yet again, it was Mom. She had just met my brother at the finish line and knew that I was in Rainier, and then she started doing the math and realized I was at least 4 hours away and she started freaking out. She wanted to come pick me up, threatening that the sag wagon was going to close the course and aliens would abduct me as soon as it got dark. She just wouldn't give it a rest. Yes, I know I have a 6am flight tomorrow morning, but that doesn't help me ride any faster right now! After trying to reason with her finally I just said "listen, what I'm doing is hard enough, and you're not making it any easier." I suggested to her that if she was trying to be helpful she could pick up my bag from the truck before the finish line closes. Otherwise just leave me alone, pfffft! OK, I didn't say that last part, but I certainly thought it. Back on the road around 8:00pm.
Once on the Oregon side of the river my speed picked back up to a decent 15mph rate. Probably a combined effect of a nice tailwind, the apple pie, and the 'supportive' phone call from Mom. From here on back the road was familiar and comforting. I am so very glad that yogaangel and I trained so much on highway 30. My legs were really starting to feel in pain. I was seriously debating whether or not to I would be able to make it to Portland at this rate. On my left (problem child) knee the tendon below the patella hurt, as well as that big ol' tendon in the back of the knee (where the hamstring connects?), and the top of my IT band on my right leg were the worst, and then general screaming soreness from all muscles. I forced myself to keep drinking water and ran out, and then worked on finishing my half-full bottle of cytomax. Around that time my legs started to feel less painful, most likely from the electrolytes in the Cytomax. For a while I could see a yellow-jacketed cyclist about a half-mile ahead of me, until s/he stopped at the Deer Island convenience store. I was considering stopping until I saw some kind of support vehicle pull over honking and I was afraid it was the Sag Wagon coming to fetch me so I just kept going. Bring Out Your Dead! They'll have to catch me first! I made it to St. Helens (mile 178 ) at around 9:30pm and hit a gas station to buy some Powerade. Watched a really beautiful sunset as I tried to eat more nutella-cookie sandwich bombs but they were just too rich, so I ate more oreos instead. Eyeing my stash of goo I realized that I had about 5 packs left and I could start using these again to get back to Portland.
By this time it was dark and here I am with no headlight and a mere sliver of a crescent moon low in the sky. My blinkybutt light was flashing strong though, and I could always make out the white line and stay somewhere to the right of it when there were no cars. When a car would come up behind me I could use the light from it's headlights to visualize the distance ahead as far as I could and move further away from the white line. It was at this moment that I was so thankful that they finally swept the bike lane on Highway 30. As recently as a few weeks ago it was full of junk and debris and I surely would have gotten a flat tire in the dark being unable to navigate around the junk. Passed Scappoose (mile 185) at 10pm and kept on trucking, slurping down a several more packets of goo for the few hills I knew were coming up. By the time I got to Scappoose I realized I was close enough and alive enough that I would be able to get to Portland. But then I also realized that the Finish line was long closed. At that point I made my decision: I would reach the City Limits, but not ride the last 5 miles into downtown. I called the ManFriend and told him to meet me at the Shell station in Linnton in about 45 minutes. Shortly after Scappoose I saw a mini-stop on the side of the road with a bunch of tents next to it, I gathered that the volunteers staffing it just decided to camp overnight to be available to help the slowpokes like me and be ready bright and early for the next day riders. In the pitch black they must have seen my blinky red light because out of the darkness I heard a whoop of encouragement. I choked up and barely managed to squeak out a response yelp, and had to quickly shove the lump in my throat back down to keep from getting an asthma attack. Further on ahead I saw some blinking ahead in the distance and it slowly got closer and closer. I passed a group of 4 who were dogging up the hill and we all just whooped at eachother in encouragement. Well, either that or I just scared the holy crap out of them by sneaking up behind them in the dark with no headlight, not sure which. :p
At 10:45 I reached the Portland City Limits sign (mile 193), and about a mile later I was in Linnton, very carefully stepping off my bike and clutching the tailgate of the truck trying not to fall over. What amazes me to no end is how I can be so tired and shakey that I can barely walk or get into the truck and yet be capable of hauling *** on a bike in that condition. Strange, indeed. The last 40 miles I kept envisioning the scene in the second Black Stallion movie where he's riding the horse around the track and just glued onto the horse, hands frozen around the reins which they had to cut off in order to get him off the horse. In a way I envy the wonderful camraderie of a community ride and arriving at the finish line in celebration the way my friends did, but instead it was just a very quiet and very solitary journey the last 100 miles.
This is the way my STP ends, not with a bang but a whimper.