One BIG apology!

[ClockworkOrange]

Have never been one to suffer from depression but I think recently I have come near it and in all honesty, there is no specific reason. http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2252/2397085728_bf8d770985_o.gif

I have one special friend on this site and after writing to her explaining my lack of communication, her reply just helped made me feel back to normal again. Big hug to Running Mommy http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/Missbe/mmd.gif

For no reason I have just felt I cannot be bothered with anything or anybody. I even went through my address book and crossed out people who I have know for many years, thinking what's the point, I will never see them again.

Have become a seriously Grumpy Old Woman.

Then there's the weight thing, have this distinct feeling my metabolism has stopped, nothing to do with eating too much or the wrong things :D

I've never been one to dislike it when my birthday is due, it was fun reaching 40, then 50 BUT...........I am not laughing at reaching 60 in 15 months. :( Keep having morbid thoughts of how and when I will die...........sheeeeesh, I am becoming really weird. :rolleyes:

Then constantly worrying about my son, even when nothing is wrong, he's not even a kid but a man of nearly 33!

BUT...........I love New Years Day and it is nearly here, New Year and time to look forward.

Hmmmmm, bet you are wondering what the apology fingie is about. Well, I put my name down for sending Christmas cards and yes, could not be bothered, how bad is that.

Then realised it was too late, however, I have just (with a lot of help from my BF), made some New Year cards so I hope that makes up for not sending Christmas cards.

Wishing you all a very happy Christmas from England.

This site is great, I have not been on here for a while but directly I sign on and check out the threads, I feel at home.


http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3242/3122678356_8b3479a6cc_o.gif

Clock

[snapdragen]

Happy New Year back at you clock! I understand perfectly where you are coming from, right now I'd like nothing better than to cancel Christmas. I won't go into details, just want you to know you're not alone!

[Zen]

Awww, Clock. Believe it or not, I think of you often. I still get a kick out of the card you sent out last year. There are many people on here I'll probably never meet but I still like to think of them as my friends.

Since my mother died I don't even do christmas anymore which is really a great big relief. I did go christmas shopping, the only difference this year is all the gifts were for me :D

Take yourself christmas shopping, start planning next years charity ride and remember you have friends here who only want the best for you.

[Mr. Bloom]

Hang tough! The days start getting longer this week and that might help a little.

Depression is nothing to apologize for or to be embarrassed about.

[shootingstar]

Glad you're looking forward to New Year's, orange. Hope to see more of you around the TE watercooler. :)

[Aggie_Ama]

((Clock)) Thanks for checking in and no apologies for the evil depression. I have gone through it and was too ashamed to admit it. It is awful, glad you are looking ahead to brighter days.

I normally love Christmas but this year I am scrooge to the max! I have tried to do fun things like decorate, go on a Holiday Wine Trail but dang I just want to fast forward to New Years Day. Eat a big ol' bowl of Black Eyed Peas and look forward to a new year.

[BleeckerSt_Girl]

Good to hear from you, Clock.
It sounds like you've had a hard year. You are not alone, many people have been experiencing a particularly awful year.
I do hope that if your depression does not go away on its own soon that you seek some professional help, since depression is very treatable and you have every right to feel normal and happy again.
I agree with you, putting this past year behind and looking forward to changes and new beginnings in the coming year is a good attitude.
Here's to a good new year for all TE members that are experiencing difficult times right now.

[LBTC]

Clock, here are some very bright and special butterflies to lift your spirits.

Many hugs,
~T~

[Selkie]

You were missed but you're back now which is what matters.

The rough spots in life are just temporary and make us appreciate the good times.

Sending good karma your way - Happy New Year.

[crazycanuck]

Clock, you're here with us :) & that's what matters. Don't fret about not sending cards out..i am sending new years type cards when we get back to Perth :o.

Have a wonderful holiday & don't forget to take care of yourself!

:)C

[OakLeaf]

(((((Clock)))))

wanna know a secret? DH and I haven't sent cards in two years and depression is the reason... we're really TRYING to send them this year.

I wasn't on the card exchange - but don't be hard on yourself. Welcome back.

[bmccasland]

Hey Clock,
I thought of you when I went with a friend to our favorite Mom&Pop Ice Cream Parlor - they had a flavor of ice cream called Clock Work Orange! (I didn't have any though, don't really like the combo of chocholate and orange) So you're famous in New Orleans, you have a flavor of ice cream named after you!!! Aren't you thrilled! Glad you're back. :D

[ClockworkOrange]

Hey, you made me http://i7.photobucket.com/albums/y272/Missbe/crying.gif

Every single post was so good to read, it really was very kind of people to even bother.

Then I got home this evening and had three cards from the other side of the world!........postmarks where San Jose, NY and VA. I didn't tear them open like I usually do, I waited until I sat down at dinner. Isn't it strange how something as small as a card from a relative stranger can make you smile and feel all happy?

I was so pleased I got my act together last night and got my New Year cards all finished AND posted today.

Maybe somebody can answer why I feel so much better, being able to share how I have been feeling. I actually feel I am getting back to the old me?

Cheers all.

Clock

PS I had a cake made (below) for some friends I had made via the internet, when I did my London Bikeathon earlier this year. This cake is also relevant to this site. You can even see were the candles where.


http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2080/2810713668_6b3949805f_o.jpg

[solobiker]

Hang in there Clock. I too have been in a funk so to speak and have worked very hard to dig my way up and out of it. Just know you have my support 100% of the way.:D

[snapdragen]

Then I got home this evening and had three cards from the other side of the world!........postmarks where San Jose, NY and VA.

San Jose?! What kind of freak lives in San Jose! :rolleyes:



Maybe somebody can answer why I feel so much better, being able to share how I have been feeling. I actually feel I am getting back to the old me?


Sometimes just acknowledging that you feel bad, helps you to snap out of it. :cool:

[sundial]

Awwww honey, if you were here I'd make us both a nice cup of peppermint tea and just watch the sun set over the pond. Christmas is hard on me--it always has been. I usually end Christmas with a good cry. On top of that, all I've wanted to do was go to bed really early and hope that February will be here in a jiffy because then I'll hear the peeper frogs. :) Spring will be here soon enough but in the meantime, know that you are NOT alone. :)

[bmccasland]

CWO - Go out and have some fun food, I'm seriously thinking about having Chinese. Either that or Chicken Masala - found good (to me anyway, I'm lily white-what-do-I-know :confused:) Masala sauce in a can + roasted chicken from the grocery store + basmati rice (I can cook rice) + a veg = almost instant Indian dinner. And it isn't bland. :p

I think the ice cream parlor is close on Christmas. You'd like it - they make their own flavors, and some of them are rather... bizare.

I've enjoyed the TE card exchange more than the ones I get from family - family is almost an obligation. But TE is a gift - it's something extra, we all signed up to do something extra, and besides it's so much fun to see what people pick out. So hang in there, we're hanging with you!

New Year's will be here soon!

[ClockworkOrange]

Awwww honey, if you were here I'd make us both a nice cup of peppermint tea and just watch the sun set over the pond. Christmas is hard on me--it always has been. I usually end Christmas with a good cry. On top of that, all I've wanted to do was go to bed really early and hope that February will be here in a jiffy because then I'll hear the peeper frogs. :) Spring will be here soon enough but in the meantime, know that you are NOT alone. :)

Why does smiling make you feel so good? After reading what you wrote, I just sat here smiling and felt soooooo happy..............almost had a tear running down my face but a happy one! :rolleyes:

So many times when you guys write something, I have to do an internet search as I have never heard of it. Now I know what a peeper frog is.


CWO - Go out and have some fun food.........................

I think the ice cream parlor is close on Christmas. You'd like it - they make their own flavors, and some of them are rather... bizare.

I've enjoyed the TE card exchange more than the ones I get from family - family is almost an obligation. But TE is a gift - it's something extra, we all signed up to do something extra, and besides it's so much fun to see what people pick out. So hang in there, we're hanging with you!

You are so right about the card exchange. I absolutely loved your card, in fact it currently has pride of place on my mantlepiece, a cat with antlers, now that is cool.

We do not have ice cream parlours like you guys over in the States but they sound yummy. We might catch up one day.

It is good to be able to share this with you all but I just feel 100% since talking about things, so thank you for listening.


Clock

[NoNo]

You are so right about the card exchange. I absolutely loved your card, in fact it currently has pride of place on my mantlepiece, a cat with antlers, now that is cool.
Clock

I think you're referring to my Ruthie, but I'm glad she made you smile:) I assure you, she was none too pleased with that situation, and the antlers were off in seconds.

I'd also like to thank everyone for their cards, it's been so much fun coming home and finding something in the mail. And such a cool variety of cards, too! Way more fun than that sappy Hallmark stuff family always gives:cool:

[MomOnBike]

I'm still wondering why you felt it necessary to apologise. None were needed. Sometimes depression happens, we deal (as best we can, friends help) and move on. It sounds like you are moving on.

There. Problem solved. :)

The neat thing about this board is that we will try to help each other out if needed. No biggie. Thank YOU for giving us someone to care about/for.

[ClockworkOrange]

I think you're referring to my Ruthie, but I'm glad she made you smile:) I assure you, she was none too pleased with that situation, and the antlers were off in seconds.

I'd also like to thank everyone for their cards, it's been so much fun coming home and finding something in the mail. And such a cool variety of cards, too! Way more fun than that sappy Hallmark stuff family always gives:cool:

Hi NoNo or should I say yesyes?!?!

No, I was referring to the card from bmccasland BUT I received your lovely card this mornng, what a great idea the way you made it, I so liked the originality. Yes, I can see Ruthie was not too impressed!

I now have two cards together showing cats with antlers.......:D

Clock

[sundial]

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y186/2dogcrew/TonyLlama.jpg

This is Tony. :)

[Aggie_Ama]

I love Tony! I would hug him and love him and call him Tony if he was mine. I so want a Llama or Alpaca, is he yours Sundial?

[ClockworkOrange]

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y186/2dogcrew/TonyLlama.jpg

This is Tony. :)

OMG.......he is so gorgeous.

Pretty please, can I swop him for my 32 year old son who is called Tony?

Wait, I have a No “el” llama for your Tony. :D

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3026/3131067559_099ddf40a2_o.jpg

Clock

[solobiker]

Tony is so cute...Thanks for the pic. It brought a smile to my face. I just love the eyes.

[Smilie]

I LOVE Tony! Thanks for sharing him, he is so sweet!

I ran out of cards this year.:( And I am behind getting new ones to send out, it's on my list for tonight. I did buy stamps for overseas though!

[msincredible]

Our future next-door neighbors have 2 Alpacas! :D

[sundial]

I so want a Llama or Alpaca, is he yours Sundial?

No, he belongs to some rancher friends of mine. He loves to talk to people. :) I bet he would enjoy a nice hug from you, Clock. And yes, he'll be happy to go visit you if you can get him by customs. ;)

The llama with the reindeer antlers--LOL! :D :D

[NoNo]

Hi NoNo or should I say yesyes?!?!

No, I was referring to the card from bmccasland BUT I received your lovely card this mornng, what a great idea the way you made it, I so liked the originality. Yes, I can see Ruthie was not too impressed!

I now have two cards together showing cats with antlers.......:D

Clock

Ooops, my bad.:o Glad you liked the card, a little time and some photoshop can go a long way;)

Tony is adorable! I love how he's smiling at us, like he knows something we don't.