My own stupidity

[madscot13]

So today I was biking to the bike shop on our fabulous Midtown Greenway, a wonderful bike/ pedestrian pathway through a rather traffic/ construction infested part of town. I was at a crossing and all of the cars stop and the lights are flashing to stop for pedestrians. Well long story short one car didn't stop, one of my tires is a taco, and I'm just a little bruised and scatched up. An officer was at the scene in two shakes, I think she was heading down the street to begin with. I didn't press charges just because I wasn't hurt and the man agreed to pay for the repairs. We head on to the few blocks to the bike shop and I am in the officers car and I learn that she is a fellow cyclist with a $10 garage sale bike and a $3000 carbon trek. Alright it was great to relate but she couldn't stick around the bike shop, you know she has to protect the streets and all. But we are at the shop and the jerk who broke my wheel won't even pay for the wheel replacement that is equal to the one I have. I am angry we start arguing. Alright fine. Then fill out this form the office gave me in the car. Okay no? The bike shop gal said the police department is just down the street. Bad man snaps at her. This guy got off easy. He didn't stop for a pedestrian cross walk, I'm not pressing charges, I just want the $60 for a new tire. We is giving me the worst sort of grief and I am sick of his ugly mug. I send him out of my sight. I shouldn't have done that, i should have called the officer back. What the heck was I thinking. I am so stupid.

[Jiffer]

I'm so glad you're okay! That's the most important part. However, I feel your pain in your "what was I thinking"! I know I make not so great decisions sometimes when I'm "in the moment". I sold my bedroom furniture for much less than I should have because the people who showed up ready to haul it away happened to "only have x amount of dollars on them" and the bank was closed, etc. I gave in because I wanted the furniture gone, but later thought, "Why didn't I just tell them to come back the next day with rest of the money and I'd be happy to let them take my furniture!"

I'm wondering if you could still press charges ... if you have changed your mind. The officer must have gotten his information. I would have probably been like you and not wanted to file charges, but yet how maddening it must be that he wouldn't even pay for what the tire was worth. Maybe he needs to be taught a lesson.

But again ... glad you're okay. :)

[RoadRaven]

Pleased to hear you are ok, MS, but very very angry with this guy.

I agree with Jiffer... go back to the cop - she will remember you, and get her to help you through the process!

Don't let this guy get away with it HIS stupidity...

[Zen]

It's probably not too late to press charges. What a jerk!
I'm happy to hear you're ok but are you sure you don't have knee problems or something ?wink wink
I get so mad at this stuff:mad:

[makbike]

First, I'm glad you are okay.

Second, contact the officer and ask her for some help.

Third, can you take this guy to small claims court? Ask the officer to supply a written statement.

[madscot13]

He gave me $40 and refused to do more. I tried to remind him of what just happened and our agreement. He started talking lawyer (who just happened to be on the scene) and I should have called the officer back. I think taking the money was my mistake but at the time I was like $40 is better than nothing. I really should have called the officer and she would have been right back.

[RoadRaven]

Call the officer anyway
Get her advice

You don't have a peice of paper anywhere saying that the $40 was "full and final settlement" and you haven't signed such a document either.

It was a down payment on the original understanding you made in good faith - that he would replace your wheel for the actual cost.

Good faith verbal agreements can stand up in a court of law over here...

You also have the arguament of being in shock - you were the victim - your body was dealing with the stress of a near miss.

Contact the officer - she will remember - she will empathise... call her...

[Zen]

This guy is a bully.

Please call the officer.

[KnottedYet]

Call the officer. The driver is a @#$ and was taking advantage of you. The officer will be able to tell you what your next step should be.

[madscot13]

Thank you guys, I thought that calling her back would be another stupid move because I didn't take the right steps initially and that each decision I made left her less and less to work with. I did call her but it was too late and she didn't answer. I will call again before work and during my break tomorrow.

I usually keep things together. My bestfriend has never seen me cry. I just don't cry in front of people but the bike store got a lot today. They were really sympathetic and although I have never purchased anything before they have seen me in the store every now and then. If I ever get it together they will be seeing a lot of me.

Processing this has been really hard. The shock has worn off and I am feeling that knee that got whacked with the Cro- Moly pipe. But worse I don't want to bike. You know how you eagerly await the call from the bike shop saying your bike is done. I am not. That means I have to ride it home. I don't know how to do that. I figured this out when I was I was thinking of how I get to work in the morning and that is usually bike. Mine is in the shop but I do have a spare I cleaned up for a friend but she has not recieved yet. But then I realized I don't want to bike. I would rather walk 4 times slower and get up at 5:30 instead of 6:00 than bike.

[Mr. Bloom]

Hang in there mads. Don't let this single bad experience taint your perspective on things. The anger and apprehension you feel are normal...let them process...let them pass.

I'm very glad your injuries weren't worse.

[lph]

madscot, I know how you feel. Meeting bad people in traffic is such a confidence killer, and not wanting to ride really sucks...

If you can, try to make the next rides easy on yourself. Get up earlier (or go in later) to miss traffic, try to have plenty of time, try biking in with all the time in the world just to keep your pedals turning. Stop and have a coffee on the way. Have somebody ride with you.

Hope your knee and psyche heal well!

[Torrilin]

Mads, it's ok to walk, or even take the bus. You're hurting, both mentally and physically. It's reasonable to not want to ride with a busted knee. So give yourself a bit of time for your knee to heal. The backup bike will be there after work.

You're beating yourself up a *lot* over this. You weren't stupid. You trusted that the guy would do what he said he would do. That is a reasonable thing to trust in. The accident wasn't your fault either. You need to be gentler with yourself! You were doing the right kinds of things the whole way through the incident. Now you know for next time to just press charges, but really that's the only thing to change. Pressing charges will help you some, but more importantly, the driver will have the accident on their record. If they ever hit another cyclist or pedestrian, the criminal justice system will have more leverage.

It's also ok to cry. It's part of being human. You may want or need to cry a lot in the next few weeks. You're allowed. It's a way of dealing with stress.

[SouthernBelle]

1. Charge the guy.

2. Did you get his insurance information?

3. Contact your own lawyer.

4. Go to the doctor.

[rij73]

You are being WAY too hard on yourself! Even the thread title is unnecessarily self-deprecating. Just take it easy, and you'll be back into riding in no time. The guy was a total ***. You didn't do anything wrong at all. You were shaken up as you should have been, and were disgusted with him as you should have been, and that's that. Now that he's been such a jerk, he deserves charges brought against him. You should absolutely pursue it. I'm sure it's not too late. Teach him a lesson!

And, again, don't be mean to yourself. You rock!

[missymaya]

As what everyone else has said, it's good that you're ok but you need to make sure your knee is ok and call the officer. The guy was being a jerk and HE was in the wrong, NOT you. That being said, don't be hard on yourself, you were being a good person and taking his word for it, not knowing he wasn't gonna keep his end of the deal. You're not stupid, he is. And, it's ok to be apprehensive about riding after the accident, that's normal. Just don't let it run your life. If you love to ride, start back easy, on MUTs and in the early am or late pm. Hope everything works out.

[mimitabby]

reminds me of the time I was 21 years old driving a beater vw bug and got rear ended by a businessman in a new car. He gave me $5.00!!! to repair my rear light and drove away. Granted, things didn't cost as much then as they do now (my bill was more like $40 ) but I was intimidated and young and... i still get mad today when I think about it.

[Geonz]

He's *counting* on you being bully-able. He probably lives like that: rolls over people and then just rolls *back* over 'em so they do what he wants until he goes away. I know it's hard... but for the next person this guy hurts (in whatever assorted ways he hurts 'em), contact the officer and see if just maybe there's a chance he'll not have such an easy time stomping all over people. At least make him have to *think* a little...

[cosc]

Sorry you have to deal with this selfish driver. You are fortunate not to be hurt too bad, but mentally you do need much healing. Don't force yourself to ride till you feel stronger, and yes you will soon will be back a-pedlin. I could easily made the same decisions given the circumstances. You just want to get all the nasties over and forget it. The guy needs a good gouge though to remember he's not the only important person on the road. I hope this soon will be a past bad memory.

[pooks]

I'd bet money that this guy was all nice and willing to pay for things while the cop was there, while witnesses were there, with no intention of following through.

Go after him. Press charges. And get that knee checked out.

Don't feel foolish. He's counting on that.

You were struck by a car while on a bike. YOU'RE not the one who is supposed to feel foolish, guilty, or even on top of your game. You were shaken up and took the guy at his word. His word wasn't good.

Now you go press charges. I can't imagine that it's too late.

[spokewench]

This is very typical behavior! So, this is probably a lesson to all who ride bikes and all of us on TE. If you are hit or pushed off the road by a vehicle and they stop. If they don't stop try to get their license but I know it's hard to get that when you are lying on the ground! GET A POLICE REPORT. Usually, you don't know when you are hurt under these kinds of circumstances. Your adrenalin is going and you don't feel those things that might be hurt. Also, some things are strains, etc. that you won't feel until the next day or so.

I know it is a pain to stand around waiting for an officer, etc., etc., but it is the smart thing to do!

I'm not preaching at you guys, cause I let someone go one time when I got hit by a car too. Stupid! Just don't do what I did, it is not the right thing to do.

spoke

[northstar]

Madscot...

So this guy ran a stop sign and hit you? Did he get a ticket? If not, something's wrong here! Was there a police report?

Also, this might be something his car insurance would cover (property damage). Then again, if it's only a $60 tire, he might just have to pay out of pocket...

Stop beating yourself up! Get on the phone and make this jerk pay!

[Eden]

This is a familiar sounding story. I know other people who've had the same experience - mainly because non-cyclists often have *no idea* how much cycling gear costs. The last person I remember was hit on his carbon fiber Look. The guy who hit him thought it was going to cost him $300 or something like that to replace it, so he agreed to go to the shop and buy a new frame and the cyclist didn't call the cops. The driver skipped when he found out just how much it was going to cost him...
Its good you talked to the police in the first place. Hopefully they'll be able to help you track the guy down. He should pay for all the repairs to your bike and any medical bills you might have. He hit you in a crosswalk! It's hard to get much more wrong than that..

[rapid cycler]

In the heat of the moment, I think a lot of us go to the self-blaming zone, probably because it's easier on the psyche than admitting to ourselves that we share the planet with such asshats. You are not the one who behaved badly here; to the contrary, you were very human and forgiving in a stressful situation. But now you need to nail that sucker!

I've been struggling with some rage issues lately. You want I should rough him up for you? Please forward his contact info.

[madscot13]

Alright I called the Officer and left her a message. She immediately called back and said that it sounds like this guy gave you some trouble then. Well he did, and now he is going to get some trouble. The Officer stopped by my house after work and yep I actually have 10 days to file a claim. She more than understands the situation and how we let him off so easy and how he did not fulfill our agreement. The Officer agrees that this guy made a bad choice and will be sorely regretting it and is completely on my side. Things will now be in the hands of the insurance and the law. I am sorry to see things come to this but he has shown himself to be a dishonest man and other things. Cooperation is in his best interests but not in his track record. The Officer listed how this will be financially be hurting him: his tabs that don't match up, his refusal to give me his information, insurance, tickets, and even possibly misdemeanor charges. He did not bargain with this but he thought he was bargaining with someone much weaker. He was wrong, I have the law, I have the support of my family, and friends like you guys. Without your push I don't know what I would have done. A lot of sleepless nights. A lot less biking.

So once again I have to thank you all for your support. I will be biking soon on the love of my life. The fact that I am not completely screwed over has taken some of the bitter taste out of my mouth. Thanks.

[Eden]

Way to go!

[Zen]

Power to the People!:D

[Aint Doody]

Yahoo!!!!!! Great news. Hope they put him under the jail!

[rapid cycler]

Awesome! Go, Mad!

[northstar]

Yeah!

You go, girl! I'm so glad you got the ball rolling!

[KnottedYet]

Yeah, baby!

[lph]

WOOHOO!

good cyclist - bad driver 1-0.

:D

[pooks]

This is great news. Please keep us updated!

[rij73]

Like I said above, you rock! I had a feeling the female cyclist cop would come to the rescue...

[cinnamon_toast]

Good for you!!! I hope that justice will prevail. That guy deserves everything he's got comin' to him.

[SouthernBelle]

Check and see if your wheel needs truing!

[bmccasland]

Mads,
So glad to hear you went back to the police. At least they'll "help" him learn his lesson :D .
Maybe send him back to kindergarden when we were supposed to learn to play nice in the sandbox, share our toys, and all that.

Did you see a Doc about your knee?

Good vibes coming at you from the Big Easy :) :p :)

[Torrilin]

Good :) You sound like you're in a lot better shape mentally :D

Everyone else is right, if your knee is still feeling lousy, you should check with a doctor.

[Susan126]

YAHOO! :D Glad to hear you called the police! I can't believe how he treated you! So wrong! He deserves to go in front of judge!

Please keep us all posted!

Sue

[Python]

Good for you. Well done:D

This guy sounds like he needs his a*se well and truly kicked:mad:

[pyxichick]

Mad,

I'm so glad you're okay after your incident.

Did this happen on Minnehaha Ave. by any chance? Just wondering because there's always about a 50/50 chance that cars will stop for you there.

Hope you're back on the bike soon.

Kate

[madscot13]

Thank you for all of your well wishes.

Kate, yep it was Minnehaha. That day it was 3:1 that a car would stop for me. You win some, you lose some. I keep trying to make it out to the Velobella rides but I can't ever seem to make it and here is another deterrant.